The "you have too much time on your hands" comment has become the catch phrase for anything done for pure pleasure. I am sorry your husband's coworkers did not appreciate the gesture.

Frankly I believe the type of people that make those comments are those that plop down on the couch immediately after dinner and are glued to the tv until it is time to go to bed...they complain that they never have time for anything (God forbid they miss a rerun episode of "Friends"), but if they only would break that tv habit they would have lots of time to do anything they desire. I know I used to have that ball and chain tied around my neck. Thank goodness for stamping, now I can't stand to just sit and veg in front of the tv.

I got the "comment" a couple years in a row at work around Christmas when I bought in the 10-15 various kinds of Christmas goodies. I love to bake and would make about 1000 cookies/goodies and bring them in all during the week before Christmas. I didn't do it this year and boy did I hear it! "Why didn't you make your goodies, aren't we going to get some Christmas cookies?" I told them that this year was extremely busy (I went on a cruise the first two weeks of Dec when I usually make the cookies) and was hit with "But how can you be that busy, you don't have kids or a husband to take are of?" These "comment" makers don't understand the gift of giving and the joy it brings to those of us that do understand. They are the takers of the world.

I believe that an appropriate response to someone who has just received a card/gift and then says "You have too much time on your hands" would be...

"Oh, but I think you are worth the extra time, energy and love that it took to make this."

A more snarky response would be "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were worth it. My mistake."

That made me laugh! :lol: SO TRUE!

MIL are like that.....
 

It's not just making cards that arouse those types of comments.

I used to design painted projects for magazines like Crafts n Things, Country Marketplace and several others and I did fairly well at it.

My MIL would nag me all the time with "Why don't you get a real job instead of playing at your publishing hobby?" I wasn't playing at it, I was very serious and sold a couple of new designs to the magazines each month. It sure hurt when she so openly devalued what I choose to do for a living.

The funny part was, when I did get a real 8 to 5 job, she was still unhappy and complaining because I wasn't available to take her to the doctor or run to the store when she needed something as I spent all day at work.

The moral of the story is with that kind of MIL, NOTHING you do will ever be right, so just IGNORE them..... If it's not the cards she picks on you about it will be something else....

So sorry this happened to you. I had a similar thing happen to me when I made a composition book, pen and thank you cards for someone who gave me some used clothes for my son. She said, "Well aren't you Artsy Fartsy!" I almost wanted to cry!

I laughed so hard when I read this, KOLEY! SO TRUE!! :lol:

So sorry this happened to you. I had a similar thing happen to me when I made a composition book, pen and thank you cards for someone who gave me some used clothes for my son. She said, "Well aren't you Artsy Fartsy!" I almost wanted to cry!

I laughed so hard when I read this, KOLEY! SO TRUE!! :lol:

How Frustrating!
 

So sorry this happened to you. I had a similar thing happen to me when I made a composition book, pen and thank you cards for someone who gave me some used clothes for my son. She said, "Well aren't you Artsy Fartsy!" I almost wanted to cry!

I am so sorry that you received such a rude comment. I have received that type of comment before, and I told them that it does not take that long to create a card and that I could teach them how. I have seen my handmade items in the trash and laying around on the floor and it was disheartening to see it. A lot of times I would pick it up myself, and re-use it. They questioned why I was picking it out of the trash and that they loved my card and I told them obviously they did not love it enough because it's in the trash. I MADE that card myself and it was hard work to make it. I told them I would re-use it and give it to someone that would appreciate it better. The look on their face was priceless. Nowadays I limit who gets handmade items from me. My boyfriend loves all of the items that I make him, and he has had cards that I made him before we were dating and those cards are like 2-3 years old and he still has them.

Please continue to make handmade items and don't let their comments get you down.

I am so sorry that you received such a rude comment. I have received that type of comment before, and I told them that it does not take that long to create a card and that I could teach them how. I have seen my handmade items in the trash and laying around on the floor and it was disheartening to see it. A lot of times I would pick it up myself, and re-use it. They questioned why I was picking it out of the trash and that they loved my card and I told them obviously they did not love it enough because it's in the trash. I MADE that card myself and it was hard work to make it. I told them I would re-use it and give it to someone that would appreciate it better. The look on their face was priceless. Nowadays I limit who gets handmade items from me. My boyfriend loves all of the items that I make him, and he has had cards that I made him before we were dating and those cards are like 2-3 years old and he still has them.

Please continue to make handmade items and don't let their comments get you down.

I am so sorry that you received such a rude comment. I have received that type of comment before, and I told them that it does not take that long to create a card and that I could teach them how. I have seen my handmade items in the trash and laying around on the floor and it was disheartening to see it. A lot of times I would pick it up myself, and re-use it. They questioned why I was picking it out of the trash and that they loved my card and I told them obviously they did not love it enough because it's in the trash. I MADE that card myself and it was hard work to make it. I told them I would re-use it and give it to someone that would appreciate it better. The look on their face was priceless. Nowadays I limit who gets handmade items from me. My boyfriend loves all of the items that I make him, and he has had cards that I made him before we were dating and those cards are like 2-3 years old and he still has them.

Please continue to make handmade items and don't let their comments get you down.

I am so sorry that you received such a rude comment. I have received that type of comment before, and I told them that it does not take that long to create a card and that I could teach them how. I have seen my handmade items in the trash and laying around on the floor and it was disheartening to see it. A lot of times I would pick it up myself, and re-use it. They questioned why I was picking it out of the trash and that they loved my card and I told them obviously they did not love it enough because it's in the trash. I MADE that card myself and it was hard work to make it. I told them I would re-use it and give it to someone that would appreciate it better. The look on their face was priceless. Nowadays I limit who gets handmade items from me. My boyfriend loves all of the items that I make him, and he has had cards that I made him before we were dating and those cards are like 2-3 years old and he still has them.

Please continue to make handmade items and don't let their comments get you down.

Oh my! people can be so rude! I think you should stop giving your work to these people start taking those cards (you would have given to them) and package them in bags (put a sticker and amount on the back, then people know that they are for sale). put them in a basket and sell then to your friends, co-workers, etc.
then you can start "dropping" the number of cards that keep flying out into the conversation w/your MIL. you just won't have time anymore to give your work away (to her).
My friends know the value of the cards I make. A local store here sells hand made cards, very simple layered cards for 5-6$ each!! They love buying my cards and sending them to their friends. Just a thought.

I'm so sorry you have felt so terrible about what some thoughtless people have said. I think that people just don't think before they speak.

For Christmas, I made my mother and my MIL each a 6X6 desktop calendar. They took me a very long time, deciding what the perfect thing to put on each page was. Anyway, MY MOTHER opened the gift, didn't even look at it and threw it down. UNBELIEVABLE!! My MIL, on the other hand, loved it!! I have learned not to work to hard on gifts for my mother. I have made cards for my mother and father for the last few years and have NEVER had them mention anything about them. I make them, because I love to do it. It's too bad that they don't appreciate them.

We quit buying gifts for our mothers and fathers on Mother's and Father's day and their birthdays because no one ever said, "Thank you" and we never saw the gift again. Why should we spend our hard earned money on something that someone else doesn't appreciate?? family............

Just keep enjoying your cards and give them to people who enjoy them, even if it means giving them to your neighbor or someone you don't know!!

You know, this conversation has made me think.

When I send my cards, I often find myself questioning my motives.

I so much want to send cards to be a thoughtful person, I used to send cards (before kids) to people all the time--get well, congrats, thinking of you, etc. Then the kids came along and I got out of the habit.

Now I'm sending cards--but what is my motive? Much of the time I'm thinking of ME. Are they going to like MY card? Are they going to praise ME the next time I see them? Are they going to be so excited about this card I created that I absolutely love that they drop everything and call me to thank me? Will they like this so much they will want to come to a party and order some stamps?

That is so wrong, in my opinion. Sure, I want to bless others by being thoughtful and send them something pretty. But, my motivation should be THEM, not ME. I should be doing this crafting as a ministry to others, sharing a bit of myself to bless them, not to bring praise to myself. If they do praise me, fine. (really, they are praising all of you, for I mostly CASE from SCS!! :lol: :oops: )

If I can bring joy to someone's life through cardstock and ink (and, especially, a handwritten message), that is wonderful. If they don't make a big deal out of it, so be it, it IS just cardstock and ink.

And, please, don't feel that I am insinuating that any of you are gifting others your work with the wrong motivation. As I said at the beginning of my post, this thought has been going through my mind very often lately. Tonight, even, as I made up some cello bags w/trail mix in them w/a really cute topper for my dks teachers for snacks during parent conferences, I kept thinking, "I wonder what they'll say about these cute toppers when I show up to conferences?" Gee, whiz, Emily.

If someone thinks I have too much time on my hands, maybe they're right, but maybe they're wrong. Am I accomplishing the things I need to be accomplishing for my family, or am I stamping when I should be doing something else? (or, in my case, am I spending too much time on the computer?) I think it could be the case that they are envious of you having time to do something fun. It's a matter of priorities. You can make time for whatever you choose to make time for. I'm blessed to be a sahm and to have a more flexible schedule and more free time than moms who work full time outside of the home, but, if they really want to do something creative, they could find time for it, too.

Some people don't get it when you've given a part of yourself to them. You are trying to show them that they matter, that you value them. You were being thoughtful, they were being thoughtless. Hopefully, they will realize how their words sound before they hurt someone else's feelings.

You can send me a card or post-it note holder! I KNOW that I would appreciate it! :D

When I started scrapbooking (started that before card making)....my sister would call it 'crap' booking. I found out at a workshop one night, I wasn't the only one putting up with cracks like that.

After a few years, this same sister fell in love with a craft and now knows what it is like to really love something that you feel makes a difference.

I also think we should realize a gift is a gift. We cannot dictate (nor do we always want to know!) what the receipient does with what we give them!

Years ago, on a tight budget, I shopped around and found piece by piece extra items for my mom's new place settings. I was hurt, shocked and just stunned when within 5 years she sold it all at a garage sale! A LOT of time, money, love and effort went into getting those things! I don't even want to know where the things are I have made for her all these years! Needless to say, I ask my sister what to buy my mom now - she always finds out. I don't spend lots of time making her things or shopping for her.

As for cards, I KNOW not everyone I give one to appreciates them or keeps them. For me, it's not about what they do with them, it's about the thoughts and love I put into making it and where my heart is.

Anyone who takes the time to create a handmade gift for someone is sharing part of who they are....not all who receive these gifts see that.

The come back to "you've got a lot of time on your hands" for me is, "well, it's not so much I HAVE the time as it is I TAKE the time. I really want to bless 'you' (or others) by taking the time to make you a handmade gift. My handmade gifts are a way to say I appreciate you."

When someone at a craft booth says you have too much time on your hands, let them know this is a BUSINESS for you. No, you dont have to be a demo for this to be a business either. If you have a booth and you are SELLING something, this IS a business at that moment! Say, "yes, this did take a little time, although stamping is actually really fast...but I took the time because this is my business. Purchasing my hand made cards not only allows you to get handmade stationary products at a great reduced cost than from a specialty store, it allows you to give a handmade gift to someone you love! Is there any occasion you have coming up I might can help you with?"

Lastly, for the poor souls who really don't get it...so much so they assume because you are paper crafting you are 'poor' (and who isn't !! LOL), I'd say, "Wow! I'm surprised you haven't heard of paper crafting. It is one of the fastest growing hobbies in the nation. Many are building profitable businesses in the industry and even more, like myself, are excited to be able to create and share useful items with others".....then add on something like what I said in the first quote. that should work!

Ann

Why is it so often the MIL???

A couple years mine said to DH, "Your father misses your funny cards." I told DH that he could now take care of sending them cards. I will remind him a week ahead of time that he needs to get them a card.

Then after a couple years of MIL's old friends getting cards I made (for various occasions), they must have said something nice, because then she asked me if she could BUY some from me!! So I got the SU! set to comply with their angel policy in anticipation, and asked around, and came up with a price of $15 for 8 cards, including envelopes and postage to send them to her. She said, "oh never mind, I can get a box of 25 at the dollar store." ! ! ! ! !

But then last year, she travelled to visit all her old friends and came back asking me again to make cards and she would "pay me what I said before." She wanted a bunch of thank you cards to send her old friends and so I did that for her.

Sigh. In-laws drive me crazy. I'm just glad they live 3000 miles away.

Unappreciated "Homemade" Items
 

There are a lot of people out there who just prefer to have money spent on a gift or card, even if they don't like the gift. They never go in craft/hobby stores, never go to craft fairs, etc. I look at it this way - They just don't know what they're missing... I'm very very lucky - Many in my family & DHs family are very crafty (paint,quilt,all types of needlework, knit,stamp, scrapbook, sewing, ) so both families want to see what everyone is working on, even those who aren't 'crafty'! Most are great cooks & turn out wonderful goodies. This includes the guys who are as interested as the ladies. My friends & co-workers, even if they don't craft themselves, ohh & ahh over they things I've done. It's great!! I've always given handmade gifts with no apologies & no expectations that the receiver will say 'thank you'. I love to do it & know they might not 'get it'! It doesn't lessen the fun I have doing what I do. As far as the MIL, I'd still give her your handmade cards & couldn't make myself spend a dime on a store-bought card. Just enjoy what you do!!

I'm sorry your mother-in-law feels that way. I have to say my MIL loves my cards and has saved every one of them she has received. She understands that as a SAHM I don't have all the time in the world to just sit and stamp, that taking care of my family and home are a full-time job (I have but one child - she had five!).

As many have said before me, I would continue to create cards and continue to send them to your MIL...perhaps she might get just the right one from you that will change her mind!

Jenice

I agree only certain people get special cards from me. I do buy only the $0.79 Hallmark cards that are from my son and let him put his handprint in it for the grandparents and whoever else we send a card too. At Christmas time I made 46 cards homemade and sent like 30 non-homemade to those I know wouldn't appreciate them. I figure I am not going to waste my time on someone who will throw my card away. I keep all my cards that people send me I am very sentimental and I definately love homemade cards people send me.

I am sorry your MIL wasn't nicer about your hardwork, I am just blessed to have a MIL who loves my cards more than anything else, she puts them in shadowboxes and hangs them in her sewing room. I would say you're lucky to get a card from me if you're going to be unappreciative, it is the thought that counts. Yeah someone mentioned to send her an e-card, I would do just that, it is free and you only wasted like a couple minutes e-mailing it. :) We all know where you're coming from, so hang in there and keep being the artist you are :wink: don't let them drag you or your creations down. You got us here :D

I really apprecated everything people wrote on this topic.....my family is pretty good about it, thank goodness, but some people have made comments about my having to much time on my hands, ...the cards and crafts is what I do, I had made some really nice cards for our church shut-ins, and got great comments back from the folks who got them and people who saw then in their rooms, but there is always one person that implies that you have made "too great" an effort .....this one particular lady sends generic postcards to people with a little freebee sticker on it and and old stamped greeting that I gave her....it's ok, and at least she makes the contact with folks, she's one of those folks that doesn't get it....she wouldn't say to the preacher..."You spent too much time preparing that sermon" or to the mechanic, well you didn't have to go to all that trouble for my brakes a half &*$$ job is ok, or have the heart surgeon only replace one valve, casue he or she didn't want to bother....I don't know...I guess some of it is different....but if you have a "gift" you should be encouraged to share it....and those who receive it should be gracious....my niece is a lawyer...and has pretty much everything she needs....I gave her a scrapbook of her daughter....with places to add pages, and I wasn't sure how she'd accept it.......she absolutly loved it and just beamed.....it was the best gift I could have given her....and is looking forward to adding pages...I'm looking forward to making them....I think some people may be jealous of your creativity ....but you all are right...some folks get it and others don't, and those that get it....get my best work!

I would have to use a quote from my SIL that I have adopted as my own. I would have told both the coworkers and the MIL, "The proper response is THANK YOU."

Ginger

I believe that an appropriate response to someone who has just received a card/gift and then says "You have too much time on your hands" would be...

"Oh, but I think you are worth the extra time, energy and love that it took to make this."

A more snarky response would be "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were worth it. My mistake."

Even the girls in my stamping group use the statement 'you have too much time on your hands' because of how much effort I put into my cards. I don't take that one as a shun at all, a lot of people just don't know how to gracefully say thank you.

The other comment about store bought cards, I would never give her anything again.

I am so sorry that you received such a rude comment. I have received that type of comment before, and I told them that it does not take that long to create a card and that I could teach them how. I have seen my handmade items in the trash and laying around on the floor and it was disheartening to see it. A lot of times I would pick it up myself, and re-use it. They questioned why I was picking it out of the trash and that they loved my card and I told them obviously they did not love it enough because it's in the trash. I MADE that card myself and it was hardwork to make it. I told them I would re-use it and give it to someone that would appreciate it better. The look on their face was priceless. Nowadays I limit who gets handmade items from me. My boyfriend loves all of the items that I make him, and he has had cards that I made him before we were dating and those cards are like 2-3 years old and he still has them.

Please continue to make handmade items and don't let their comments get you down.

I've had this before but replied something like "yeah, I wish, actually it was a nightmare to get it made what with my 2 year olds demands and my part time evenign work and housework etc, but I feel handmade cards are so much more personal" I think that shut them up!

Its hard though, even my own mother doesnt really appreicate stuff like this. I wanted to make a paper bog book for someone, first thought was my mum, but then I thought of the countless cards I have made her which had a quick glance, "thats nice" and are put down again. So I am making one for a stamping friend instead who will know the hours I spent making it and really appreciate it.

For easter I have made everyone a baggie with eggs and a topper with a poem, OK mostly for the kids, but everyone has the same and I hope they all like them, but dont expect any "wow your clever" comments. But I enjoyed making them, cant have it all.

Hugs
Caz
x

I can tell you this, if I ever even stepped foot in a Hallmark store, my husband would divorce me on the spot. He can't imagine me ever purchasing a "real" card after all the money I have invested in SU. I gonna continue to stamp my heart out, and if there are people out there that don't appreciate it, that's their problem.
As to the , "financial difficulties" comment: reply: I have money, it's not that I am poor. I would just rather spend it on more stamp sets that to "waste" $3.50 on you!

Unappreciated "Homemade" Items
 

I didn't know how blessed I truly am with my family and friends until I read this thread! I make all of the cards that we send and DH is proud of everyone of them. He even makes suggestions if I get "stuck" on a card that doesn't look quite like I think it should. The comments that I receive are "Don't see how you can find time to make these - thank you." Our grandchildren even have special books (bought by their mothers) to keep the cards that are made by Grandma.

I cannot imagine anyone receiving a gift made especially for them and not appreciating it. I am sorry that this happened to you. Don't let others rule your life - be proud and happy with what you do even if others do not know how to feel happy.

I would just forget those comments and continue doing what you love. I never really heard any comments expect from my hubbie and he loves them. But recently for my Grandma's birthday I bought her a really sweet card for her 80th bday and was told by my Mom that she told her I did not make her card. I was shocked that she said that because she never told me she liked them or even that she knew I made them. What a feeling. Well I sat down and made her a card right then and their to tell her I love her. So I say keep doing what you love and give them to people you love. :!:

Okay, I've now tried to post this about 10 times. Let's hope this one actually gets on.

I believe that an appropriate response to someone who has just received a card/gift and then says "You have too much time on your hands" would be...

"Oh, but I think you are worth the extra time, energy and love that it took to make this."

A more snarky response would be "Oh, I'm sorry. I thought you were worth it. My mistake."

Please don't let these insensitive comments from people who don't think before they speak bother you.

What to give as a gift is always the choice of the giver
what is done with the gift is always the choice of the receiver.
You have no control over a gift once it is given.

life is good.

kk

Re: Unappreciated "Homemade" Items
 

I agree. I'd rather give a quick and easy card that costs me next to nothing to make than fork out good stamping money on a shop-bought card!

I find the "you have too much time" comments usually come from people who feel inadequate because of your talents. It makes them feel better to think we are time-wasting layabouts who sit and colour in pretty pictures all day!

I used to get a bit bothered about people who just said a casual "thanks" for their card, but then I realised I was probably making cards for the wrong reason - I shouldn't be making them in order to get effusive thanks and attention, should I?

Re:
 

I started stamping only 2 years ago, but I used to make cards with other materials long before that... For Christmas-2003 I stamped all of my cards myself and I've been doing that since September since we have family and friends in 2 countries plus I made each card different and very fancy... Well, my BIL's wife has a display board for her X-mas cards which we look at every year as we go there for dinner... My card was NOT there although everyone else's (including the dollar store ones from other members of the family) were... I noticed one stamped card on the board and had to ask about it, of course!!! She said her sister was into stamping and made the cutests cards ever!!! Hello??? Mine must have been the ugliest, then, since it didn't even have a chance to be displayed??? Needless to say, she got the ugliest store bought card I could find in my FIL's collection for X-mas 2004!!! Oh, we have just moved into our new house and all of my house warming invitations were handstamped except for guess, whose???

Cre*tive jewles I love your post, you're right, your sister is jealous of your time at home.

But I must say, COme on, do you really expect people to save your cards? I finally threw out my Valentines cards yesterday (the one's I received) they were all store bought, I am the only stamper in the family.

I just don't have the space to save everything & I have to pick & choose. If someone had written a touching note then I might have saved it. I am not a saver & I do expect that my cards will be thrown out in the end by the receiver. I had fun making it & hopefully they appreciate that they were thought of.

Not to sound harsh but if you want apprecaition then join a swap or post in the gallery, us fellow stampers will appreciate your work!

I can't believe that your MIL said that! Ew!

I feel very lucky right now that my immediate family (mine and DH's) does appreciate what I make for them (I stamp and quilt). In fact, I wish that MIL would step back abit in her over-eagerness to see all much stuff (let me breathe, WOMAN!)

I made shower invites, thank you notes and candle favors for my sister's baby shower. They weren't very good bc I am still learning, but they meade me feel like there wasn't a thing that could be purchased that could compare. But they are all crafty (not in the Beastie Boys way) so they know that I enjoyed making them and I did it bc I wanted to make something special for them.

I am about to make bridal shower favors (tags for candles again) for a friend. I am curious how they will go over in the single, "sex-in-the-city" type crowd.

Amy

Follow-up
 

Looking back on what I posted yesterday in this thread, it struck me. Last week, I sent my sister and BIL a gorgeous blue (his favorite color!) anniversary card for their 30th, watercolored asters, multi-toned blue ribbon, 6X6. NO ACKNOWLEDGEMENT AT ALL! I'll have to dig out of her that she even got it and it'll be like, "Yeah, we got it. Nice." I think I'll ask her to return to me any cards she's not thinking of keeping. I so hated to send her that card, it turned out so gorgeous. :roll:

Oh, as an aside, I recognize lots of double posts all over the place from yesterday. It says it didn't go, error or something, so you send it again and they're all there. :oops: You can ask Jenn (jbalcer) to delete the extra posts. She HAS THE POWER! 8)

First of all I only read the first page of this thread and jumped to the end so if someone has already made these comments Sorry.
As far as the girls at your husband's work I would send a handstamped card to them saying that it really was not all that time consuming and that they to could do this. I have made these and at first I struggled( but of course they don't need to know that )but after I figured it out it doesn't really take all that long. Then invite them to a workshop at your house. It really does seem like the green eyed monster is at play here to me.
The MIL issue..... I would have had to say something like But if I give you a store bought gift then I am not giving you a piece of my heart that goes into making something for someone I love.
I have always been a big fan of Kill them with Kindness. When you get upset with someone and react in the negative they are getting the reaction they wanted. If you smile and walk off lord does it burn them up. I am not saying that sometimes my butt doesn't overload my mouth but general I try to Kill them with Kindness.
You do what you do cause you want to NOT because you have to or can't afford to do anything else. Don't let anyone bring you down for it. You just keep on being you and if they can't handle that then I would say they are the one with the problem.
Just my 2 cents

First of all I only read the first page of this thread and jumped to the end so if someone has already made these comments Sorry.
As far as the girls at your husband's work I would send a handstamped card to them saying that it really was not all that time consuming and that they to could do this. I have made these and at first I struggled( but of course they don't need to know that )but after I figured it out it doesn't really take all that long. Then invite them to a workshop at your house. It really does seem like the green eyed monster is at play here to me.
The MIL issue..... I would have had to say something like But if I give you a store bought gift then I am not giving you a piece of my heart that goes into making something for someone I love.
I have always been a big fan of Kill them with Kindness. When you get upset with someone and react in the negative they are getting the reaction they wanted. If you smile and walk off lord does it burn them up. I am not saying that sometimes my butt doesn't overload my mouth but general I try to Kill them with Kindness.
You do what you do cause you want to NOT because you have to or can't afford to do anything else. Don't let anyone bring you down for it. You just keep on being you and if they can't handle that then I would say they are the one with the problem.
Just my 2 cents

I just looked at your gallery and from the few cards that are there, I suggest that you forget everyone else and send your cards directly to me.