Insensitivity is a national epidemic these days. I guess everyone feels that "Freedom of Speech" entitles one to say whatever they want, regardless of who it hurts. Because, after all, they are the only ones that matter, right? Ok, that came out way stronger than I had intended.

In my mind, this little idea I had would be poetic justice, I'm just not sure I'd have the guts to do it. But, here's my snarky :twisted: suggestion. Go ahead and buy a cheap $1 card but distress the paper, bend corners a bit, warp it so it bows in the middle, touch it with greasy fingers. You can buy cards just like that in the grocery store, because no one gives a rip what they destroy.

All right, so I wouldn't do it quite like that, but I would bump the corners and darn, if a little stain was on it, well, it wasn't homemade so it's still "better," right???

Also, and please don't take this the wrong way. I do keep the vast majority of cards from swaps, they are usually fabulous. But there are times when a card just doesn't sing to me, or has maybe a coffee cup or something that just isn't me. Not that it isn't a nice card but they are often times more appropriate for other people. That way you can still give them a homemade card (thereby preserving your image, hehe) but not use your time and materials for someone who doesn't appreciate your thoughtfulness. Just a suggestion.

Stampin' Hugs - Linda T

:?: I posted something here. I don't see it? Did I say something that caused it to be removed? Sorry, if I did!

My comment to the one who said to me I have too much time on my hands...."No I really have very little time on my hands, but I just love to waste it on people like you"! Never spoke to me again!!! Who cares!

Re: sigh
 

I love the idea of the worthy and the unworthy!!!

This is exactly why I don't make my Christmas cards. Every year I was making them all, it would become a chore and I'd find myself thinking "well THEY won't appreciate it" and they'd be crossed off the list forever! The list was shrinking so I decided it would be better to send shop-bought ones. I even buy them in the January sales every year to stop myself from wavering in October! Now the only people who get homemade at Christmas are VERY close family (my brother and family are definitely unworthy) and fellow stampers. At least I know that other stampers, even if they don't like the cards, will appreciate the effort![/i]

The server is undergoing changes which might cause posts to be lost. Chances are, if you repost it, it will become one of those mysterious double posts! Sit tight and it might turn up.

Thanks
 

Can't decide if it is my computer or the site being jinky. I noticed several someones had respnded to my first response, but now I can't get it. My computer shows only six pages of post. When I go to page 6 to see it, mine isn't there yet when I go to review the recent replies it shows page 17 of 6. :? Which makes no sense but then I can see my last post about my missing post. I think aliens have invade my computer! Yikes! I better leave the computer and take my dd to girl scouts! Maybe the aliens will be gone when I return! :D

I also think that some of my uncrafty friends just do NOT get it & think I'm "cheaping out" on them by giving handmade cards & items.

The last few years I have made one of those 12x12 calendars for my mom for her birthday. She has loved it! (A big reason is because it is filled with grandkid pictures.) She mentioned about how many folks comment & flip through it when they come over.

This year at Christmas I was trying to come up with a new idea for my SIL, and thought of this. Other than cards, I've not made her anything with stamps before. She is about as uncrafty as they come (I don't think it is because she can't be, or doesn't have the time - I think it's because she CHOOSES to be uncrafty - but another story!).

Anyway, I told her I was working on a Christmas gift & needed about 24-30 of her favorite pictures of her family. They have a digital so I knew it would be no problem for her to print off some for me & I started work on this. I put a lot of time & effort into it & around the holidays it wasn't like I had bunches of it to give! When I finished I was so excited to give it to her. She said thank you, but I think she was honestly disappointed at her gift. I could see her face fall when she opened it. She had spent a little extra on my gift this year & I think when she saw what I gave her she thought I was being cheap. I was so disappointed. I know how much I spent on supplies etc, and if you figure in the value of all my time, my gift to her "cost" more than hers did, but she doesn't understand that.

I know the price tag isn't the important part, but I ask my DH (her brother) how can you get someone like that to understand the value of what they've been given? If they don't appreciate the time & energy you put into it, then it was not worth it. I won't be handmaking her anything again. I don't want to sound like it is only about the 'thank you', but really my time IS too valuable!

Ok, maybe I take the comment the wrong way but when someone tells me "you have way to much time on your hands". I consider it a compliment on my ability to organize my life well enough to have time to do what I like and enjoy.
I get that comment all the time because I have sewn all my curtains, did hand sewn things at craft sales and my yard is full of flowers too.
I just enjoy making things pretty. And now I stamp too, I have exchanged other crafting activities for stamping/scrapbooking, so that I am not overwhelmed with my own activities.

At Christmas I took my basket of cards to my Mom's house. Original plan was to make up a collection of cards to give to my Mom, sister and SIL but I was afraid of the reception/rejection so I just took the basket and said they could just take "a few" if they wanted some. Well my sister probably took about a dozen and my Mom took another 8, my SIL asked about them later after I left. So I felt pretty good.
I sent my sister a St. Pat's day card, they were so much fun to make I had to send them somewhere. Well she sent me an e-mail and told me how she was going to incorporate my card into the St. Pat's day scrapbooking page she was working on.
I haven't heard from my MIL on the card she got.....or from my Aunt/Godmother who is the buyer at a Hallmark.

So have fun with what you do and enjoy it for yourself and those who will appreciate it!!!
I will gladly accept your stamped and cello'd post it pads. Way better than the plain ones.

Uh oh! Part of the reason I am now in charge of making cards for my family and for my husband's when I have the time, is to save on cashola. Keep in mind that I am using supplies I have accumulated over a few years, so to me it is already money long since spent.

For me, the kinds of store-bought cards I feel good giving my family cost $6 or $7. So, spending half an hour of my time to achieve a card I feel as good giving is a savings from our perspective. Plus the fact I enjoy making cards, and also if I didn't use my supplies at all, the whole process would just have been a big waste of money!

:)

For me, its my father....he is so into looks, brands, and labels that he just doesn't appreciate anything handmade. Actually he doesn't really appreciate too many gifts at all. Very disheartening to hear, "Oh. Neat." whether it's handmade or expensive store bought. The funny thing is that he is so cheesy, his clothes, jewlery (yes, he wears his version of bling) and cologne are just so lounge lizard!!

if anyone ever made a comment about not appreciating a card i send--that is exactly what i'll do for them. and if they aren't the type to send a card to me, guess what they won't be getting? :twisted:

i'm fortunate that i've not had this happen to me (yet). everyone i've given cards to has loved them. though sometimes people don't realize i actually made their cards! during christmas i gave cards to everyone in my boyfriend's family and until he commented that i'd made them--noone realized. it was quite funny too, i had to disassemble his parents card and prove to his dad that yes, i did in fact make that--he couldn't believe we didn't buy it!

i don't expect everyone to save the cards i make. they don't save storebought cards either. i'm the kind of person who saves everything--my niece actually handed me the wrapper from the first set of chopsticks she'd ever used and asked me to put it in a scrapbook for her! but i know not everyone is like this, and i'm ok with that. i send cards because it makes me feel good. i make the cards because it makes me feel good. if someone doesn't want a card i made, they won't get a card from me (or i'll recycle what they send!) because i'm not buying cards anymore. but i'm not going to get upset because they don't hang on to something i made for them, it's enough for me to be happy creating and sending it.

lack of appreciation
 

It's been my experience that people who don't have the talent for art or crafts usually don't understand the concept when they receive a handmade gift or card. Luckily my entire family and most of my friends do "get it". Our family (well at least the girls) have all become addicted to stamping along with the other crafts we do and have decided that from now on only handmade cards will be distributed................... :D

Keep stamping and keep sending those great gifts to those who appreciate the love put into them. I love it when my DH looks over my shoulder and says.............geezz I don't know how you do that...it's amazing!!!!!!

We have a Factory Card store here...cards are .39. If you want, I can get a bunch & mail them to you. Then you can send all your lovely handmade cards to me....I will appreciate them immensely. And so will my family. My SIL loves everything I make for her....and all the rest of my family does too. Even my kids & grandson would rather have something I made for them then something from the store.
My best friend has been a Hallmark junkie for years, I even have her turning around to SU cardmaking......

I run into this kind of behavior with my MIL. For Valentine's Day my kids made her cards, really nice cards with Toucan my Love, and not even a phone call, we called her to make sure she had gotten them. They only live about 10 miles away. And I made her a card for her birthday last month (it got 60+ comments here) and she looked at it like it was a generic store card. I even tried to engage her on how I made it, no luck there, either. So for Easter, I went to Wal-Mart and got her a .49 card, had the kids sign it, and popped it in the mail. I wonder what her reaction will be?

Valerie

Hallmark has spent loads of money to brainwash people that into thinking that sending their cards is a sign of thoughtfulness - I guess it worked! Don't let it get to you!

I'd do the gas station cards, or the 99 cent cards at Hallmark. What!? They're store bought!

I'm sorry people were so rude to you! :( I think they just don't know any better. People at my work say things like that, or I bring in cards or a scrapbook to give or show and they say "I just don't have time for that." As though my time is not as valuable as theirs, or they're just better than me because they don't "waste" time like that.

I'd like to think that my time is being invested in things that people will look at and think of me-- and remember that they were important enough to me that I would spend time thinking up and creating something special JUST FOR THEM.

I quote again: STAMP ON!! (so cute!) ;)

I found the stamp again
 

The stamp I saw that seems to fit this post is: "HANDMADE CARD. Don't throw it away or those same hands will make a doll in your image and stick pins in its butt." HA!

Michelle, I looked at your gallery. You can send me a card anytime, and I will appreciate it!

:shock: If someone did that with stitching (especially one so large- AND professionally framed) I'd made!!?! I'd-- I'd-- There are no words. :x I'm glad you rescued it from her!

I have to laugh at the "too much time on your hands comment" too. It happened to me at a craft show. a woman made it to her friend (loud enough for me to hear, naturally) that she'd never have time to do stamping. I wanted to say that I don't have time to wander around on Saturday mornings through rec halls looking around, but I kept my mouth shut.

As for MIL, well I had one of those once. Trust me when I say that criticizing your card making is minor.

Too much time on my hands....
 

I am a fairly new stamper and I recently joined SCS, joined DSS and a swap and I was so excited about it and shared my excitement with my mom. I was so hurt when she said that I have WAAAYYYY too much time on my hands. I'm a SAH mom and am fairly isolated and so happy to have found a place to meet people in the comfort of my own home:rolleyes: I normally don't give a fiddler's f@rt what people think, but, wow, that stung coming from my own mom. I felt like I needed to justify myself. I started to wonder if I really do have too much time. But, alas, I have come to my senses once again, and continue to love and enjoy what I do! So there! Don't let anyone let you doubt yourself, your talents, your gifts.

When my SIL said, why do you think it says "If you care the very best, send Hallmark"!

She will not be getting one of my cards again! They may not be the Mona Lisa, but they are from my heart! I have learned to make them for those who care and for myself!

Karen

I like that my cards are appreciated here. And I like that my DH likes them! And I love that my 9 yoa DD loves to stamp with me! She makes cards for her friends and they love them! Yay! :) I really love that I love them!!!!! :) :)

Yuck!
 

People can be so mean to each other. Don't let the co-workers discourage you. It's already been said but I will say it again. They are most likely jealous of your ability and the fact that you have something that you love to do! And maybe they really just don't get it. I used to have a co-worker that was totally into making ceramics. Gave me a whole set of animals for my 1st DS's baby room. Nice but not my thing, to each his own you know..
As for you MIL, ugh. :roll: It would be nice if she at least pretended to enjoy the cards but since she can't be polite you can appease her by getting her what she wants. Buy her the 99 cent cards at WalMart that everyone else will get her. Save your best efforts and time! for the people who love your cards, I'm sure there are plenty!
So far I haven't had those experiences. My family has been very kind about my hobby. DH mumbles about the money and grumbles about how much time I spend on this site now but always asks "do you have a card for them?" My MIL saves every card I make her which is nice because sometimes she is hard to break through to. I'm sure the 1st time someone throws one away infront of me I will cry:o . Right now I live in the land where all my gifts are treasured forever and keep stored away just like all my notes from middle school!:lol:

Sonia, it's wonderful to have so much support from those you love! I'm thankful that the people that I love the most and with whom I live, support me, that is DH, DDs and DS (even though perhaps I do possibly spend maybe a little bit too much money....maybe:roll: )

You know, I love the fact that this thread has come back to life. I remember when it was fresh, and I was upset with all the rest. I have to tell you all that things can change FAST. My mother-in-law has been one of the nastiest people in my life. My husband and I have had an on-and-off relationship with her for several years at a time. She has made the most hurtful comments over the years, and I would never have sent her one of my cards (although I definitely have received those "too much time" comments from people at work). Well, I have been married for 26 years, and I cannot believe this: It took a horrible death of her daughter, and we are all so very sad to lose this lovely person who was only 32, but my mother-in-law is now a GEM! Can you imagine? And I do send her my cards, and she says nothing but nice things. There is hope for mean people! :) - Gay Howe

Gay, your comment almost made me cry (okay, I did cry)! I am so glad that you and MIL have a good relationship now. I had a very rocky start with mine and now we get along so well. We sometimes sew together. She teaches me quilting. She is wonderful to me and my family. I really am lucky to have her in my life. I think I have changed my perspective quite a bit since my dear, dear sister died suddenly three years ago at a far too young age of 34 :cry:. Life's too short! Let's make the most of it! Yay!!:D

I spent 4 months cross stitching a picture for my nephew just to have my SIL tell me that I, too, have way too much time on my hands. Never mind that she told me his length was wrong and I had to take a whole side apart and redo it. Some people are so gracious.....

Sorry you got pooped on! People can be pigs sometimes and really not worth the effort. Often the "you have too much time on your hands" comment is in jest from friends... this is acceptable but for those who are serious 3 replies come to mind. As someone already mentioned - "thought you were worth it.. sorry". #2 - " just the same hours as everyone else - guess I am just a better manager." and #3 my personal fav. "I believe the correct response is Thank you".
Keep up your good work and don't let the "pooheads" of this world get you down. Life is too short to waste your precious time.

For Christmas I made my MIL, 20 cards and I put the in a box that I decorated and made seperate file areas, so she could continue to use it. My MIL sends out cards tons of cards to friends and family, and she sends cards to the sick for her church. When I sent these cards along with other gifts at Christmas I didn't get much response, but I thought she realized the effort I put into them. Well I was wrong... Last week we went to visit (shes in NJ) my hubby asked if she used any of the cards she said NO, I don't want to send them to the sick people, so my hubby said I know send them to your friends and family. She didn't answer, then went and grabbed some cards from the dollar store and mailed out about 4 or 5 for family birthdays. So she has no intention of using the cards I made! I really wanted to ask for them back, the cards and the box came out so nice (if I do say so myself), but I know better! Anyway, I really am diappointed, I like to make presents for people because I feel it's so much more personal. I knew she sends tons of cards, and that they can be expensive. I guess I won't be doing that again!

Dina

oh for christmas last year i made my MIL 20-30 cards and a handmade book to store them in on each page i wrote the month and put lines on it so that she could write birthdays on it it turned out so cute and it all took weeks to do. she looked at it and said oh how nice really crappy then in january for her bday i made a post it note holder that also turned out really cute she looked in the gift bag and said oh she didnt even take it out of the bag. then for a thank you gift for her boyfriends aunt i made her a stamped candle and a card. she gave her the card and we found the candle in the GARBAGE can at her house. she didnt even give it to her!!!! never again will i make that women anything i swear.

I agree with you Mrs. Noofy! Let's focus on those who appreciate our wonderful talent! It is a gift, just like some are pianists or writers!:p We're artists!!!

Your post made me so sad I can't believe someone who loves your husband could be so heartless. There are people out there who think it's "cheap" to send homemade gifts if they only knew! It would be so much easier to go out and buy something they just don't get it and probably never will. Move on it's her problem not yours. By the way can I have that candle?:D

I agree with the other posters - don't let those negative comments get you down. I would like to say though that some people just don't appreciate cards at all - homemade or store bought. I know personally I love to MAKE cards but I don't like recieving cards or other "knick-knacks" (except scrapbooks, I love pictures). I just don't know what to do with them since I don't like to have any thing out where it can collect dust, and while many of the cards are beautiful I just can't keep them (that's why I love the galleries - beautiful cards, all dust free!). Fortunately I know many people who love recieving cards so I try and recycle some to them. Also happily my mom and MIL are eager to recieve my creations to give away so at least my hobby doesn't go to waste. :)

It brings me so much pleasure to make them. If the ones that don't like them, or don't respond to them, feel that way, I guess I refuse to take it personally. I have finally found something I love to do.

I have found that alot of people are not letter/card/mail people. I love mail and am so excited someone thought of me. But, others just toss anything aside, whether it is handcrafted or not.

If anyone hurts your feelings in an obvious way, just stop sending to them, period. There are soldiers, people in nursing homes, and many others that would love a thoughtful card.

I have been the 'gift giver' in my family for the last 30 plus years. I have two thoughts on gift giving. One is that we give gifts that 'we' enjoy making and giving--we give what 'we' think someone should want or need. The other thought is that we know the person well enough to give them what they will want, need or appreciate.
I have no problem giving someone a gift certificate to their favorite resturant instead of a handmade gift. They love the gift card---but don't care for hand made items. That is fine by me, afterall I'm trying to give them something they will want and enjoy! It is about them not me!!!
My mother loves to make porclein figurines, she goes to a class and it has been a great hobby for her. But....I live in a small house and don't love clutter, how many 'figurines' can one house hold???? Does this mean I don't love and appreciate what she creates??? No, but I only have so much space!!! I guess what it boils down to for me is trying to know the people I give to well enough to give them what they want and need, not just what I think they should want! Good Luck!

I just don't think ANYONE (even the gracious recipients) appreciates these cards as much as we do here. THAT'S WHAT I LOVE ABOUT HERE!!!! We are all in this together and love what we do. Let's all just keep doing what we love. The heck with anyone else.

:mrgreen: LOL Debbi, my thoughts exactly. Michelle, your gallery has awesome cards and I would be so happy to receive any of them!

I am just starting to make cards, and so far I have only given my hand made creations to people who know that I'm starting this wonderful hobby. A bunch of us at work all started together because a co-worker is a demo, so we give each other birthday cards and other little fun projects because we know we all will appreciate it. I did a few graduation cards this year and was pleased that the recipients liked them. One of them was an 18-year old young man whose aunt is also known for her hand made cards, so when he opened mine he thought it was from his aunt!

I think that the comment that "you must have too much time on your hands" can also be taken as tongue in cheek - I've heard that alot when people are really making compliments because it's unbelievable to create something so beautiful in such a short time. It's our own little secret!

Yup, give MIL or whomever, a gift card, flowers,purchased note cards, whatever she likes....and do not try to make her like your work. Not worth it. Life is too short. Don't let her likes/dislikes rent space in your brain.

However, do what you love to do, and share it with people who enjoy it also.

Your MIL needs lessons from my 10yr old niece. My sister sent me an email "Shannon says I'm to ask you to make more "thank you" notes. She doesn't like the store bought ones. "Aunt Cheri makes better ones". Her brother's Bday was last month and I made him a dozen TU cards and Shannon told her mother "see Mom, that's what I want!". Her birthday was yesterday...guess what she got in the mail for her bday :-)

I wouldn't waste any more time giving your MIL handmade anything. And as for the gals at your husbands work...nadda.