I feel your pain!
For #1...I think I just put up with the deckle/feathered effect when I did it. I tried to apply the cream very lightly but evenly at the edges of the stencil, which helped some. Maybe using sticky strip right at the edges would help? (Making a mental note to try it myself!)
#2 Have you tried reheating the embossed area, then scraping (with a tool, not bare hands) while it's still hot? I've seen reheating remove the embossing accidently, so maybe it will work deliberately.
Good luck!
Valli
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