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The year I actually made Christmas cards my DH's grandmother had mine laying down on the top of the microwave behind all of the Far Side cards and made everyone look at the Santa fart joke card (I am SO not kidding). She never even commented on it, except to say that she only likes the funny cards. I did however, notice that if I send a handmade card for no reason, she's far more appreciative. Thank goodness. I refuse to buy Santa fart stamps. But I just found out my MIL has been saving every card I ever sent her!! YIKES! I don't remember what I sent!! I've only just started putting cards in a gallery here on SCS and half the time I forget to take pictures of cards before I send them so I am only sure what ONE card I've sent her looks like... What if I duplicate? That's usually my instant reaction when I'm pressed for time to finish a card, I do something I've done before just so I get it done. I'm grateful that she keeps them, but paranoid at the same time! Some of the ladies at work have started doing the same thing... I had no idea it would be stressful, but I'm feeling pressure that someone might not like their card as much as another one I had made and that is on display in the office! LOL.
But if someone had made the "must be nice to have so much time on your hands" comment to me, I would've blown a gasket too. There's no call to be rude, ever, especially in front of children that will end up thinking that behavior is OK!
I have found that most people really enjoy my handmade cards...sometimes to the point of embarrassment. But there are always a 'few' who never say anything, mostly relatives. I just think they don't know the work that goes into them or they just don't care about handmade things. Those people get the cards "I made but don't like". I save my 'special' cards for people who care. What I have been experiencing lately is no one is responding to my RAKs. Which I think is odd because you would think splitcoaststampers would be the most appreciative of anyone! I've recently joined RAK and have sent out about 6 cards and I never got a PM or anything, so I don't know if the person received them or even cares that I sent them. Then I wonder "Why did the person join the group in the first place if they really don't care?" I will continue with RAK however cause I really believe in Random Acts of Kindness and we shouldn't expect a thank you for a kind gesture anyway. I just wish I knew which people on the list really wanted to be rak'd in the first place.
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I made a really sweet card for a little girl at church who was turning 3. It was a pinwheel card that really turned. It was the first one I had ever made like it, so it took some effort. I also included a one dollar bill. To keep the bill from falling out, I adhered it with a hermafix square. Mommy & daddy ooohed and ahhhed at the card when she took it out, she opened the card removed the $1, then her eyes lit up as she said "Look! A sticker!" Card, smard; the plain, white square "sticker" thrilled her to no end! She played with it all night!
__________________ "Worry does not empty TOMORROW of its promises; it empties TODAY of its strength." Corrie ten Boom
Avatar is my "adopted-in-my-heart-daughter" Sunitha who lives in India.
If I want someone to like my card, I upload it to SCS. Everyone on here is wonderful. I know people like the cards I send, but my joy is giving them a lift and I don't expect one back. When one comes, I am thrilled. I don't spend so much time on guy cards as most guys are not too much interested in fluff if it's not living and breathing.
I used to feel like my parents didn't appreciate my handmade cards until last year, when my DH told me that my father saves every card I make him! It may be that the person is not an 'ooh-er' or an 'aah-er' but actually appreciates them inside.
BobbiesGirl;10213336]If I want someone to like my card, I upload it to SCS. :)
After logging on to SCS, I think that if each one of us took a little extra time to comment on someone else's card it may not matter if Uncle Whozit or Crabby Gramma comments or takes the time to appreciate the cards we send.
There seems to be two kinds of people where cards are concerned - the ones who absolutely love and appreciate handmade cards - and the vast majority, who don't give a tinker's about them and whose eyes glaze over when they look at handmade cards/scrapbooking pages - these are the people who buy cards on a price basis - never mind what they look like, so I guess you have to accept it and make cards for your pleasure. I am having trouble with this concept but am trying!!!
I had the same issue with my brother who does like your FIL. I made him a card this year. It was a black happy birthday stamped on a piece of folded notebook paper. He actually called me to ask what was up. I said the effort in making it was equal to the amount of time and appreciation he had for the last card I gave him. His wife, a cardmaker, was cracking up in the background and told him that it serves him right. She hate it when he ignores her work too.
This comment made me laugh out loud. Loved it! As I'm reading these comments, I think about what we talk about from time to time in our card group - that men seem to like the spinner card made with the pennies. The moving of the image seems to appeal to them. Try a spinner card sometime!
Its a guy---I'm thinking 98% of men really dont care what a card looks like.
You got that right! Before I started making cards, here's what happened when my dh received a card from anyone: He would not even LOOK at the card first, just turned it over to see how much it cost on the back.
He's not much better now, but he does look at the front of the ones I make, and there's no price on the back to look for.:mrgreen:
__________________ Bugga in OK
"Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible." Dalai Lama
Are you sure the people not commenting on your cards know they are handmade? There has been several times I gave one to someone and they had no idea.
I agree, when a friend was going through radiation, I sent her cards every week. Later she asked me where I got all my great cards. She had no idea that I made them!
Also, an aunt never commented about my cards. I assumed she wasn�t impressed, but that didn�t stop me from making cards for her. Recently she asked me how much I would charge to make her 15 cards so she could send them to her friends. She said she knew they would love them. I was pleasantly surprised!
No, I didn�t charge her, I just asked her to buy me lunch the day I met her to deliver them.
Communicaiton is such a tricky thing sometimes and you can�t always tell what someone is thinking by their reactions.
__________________ I'm a ChemoAngel & SeniorAngel! Click HERE to learn more.
I have this problem with my in-laws. I make less expensive cards or have even bought them 99 cent cards from Hallmark. I like the idea of praying for them. I have prayed often for them but not when I make cards. It is great to hear other suggestions.
Joan
I have a touching story about my card-making. My father is very ill, in the hospital and he has dementia. Some days he just doesn't make any sense at all, and it is heart-breaking for me to see this big strong man just so frail and weak and confused all the time. I made him a Father's Day card and took it in to him on Sunday, not knowing if he would even understand what it was. He opened it up and asked me to read the verse to him. I did, then he looked over at my husband and said I have such a talented daughter! Of course I cried buckets afterward. A few minutes later he was gone again...off in his own little world. So I will continue to make him cards as long as he is here, even if I don't think he will understand.
Carole
You got that right! Before I started making cards, here's what happened when my dh received a card from anyone: He would not even LOOK at the card first, just turned it over to see how much it cost on the back.
He's not much better now, but he does look at the front of the ones I make, and there's no price on the back to look for.:mrgreen:
Thank you for sharing a wonderful, wonderful story.
Pax et bonum,
Carol
Quote:
Originally Posted by carolemartin
I have a touching story about my card-making. My father is very ill, in the hospital and he has dementia...I made him a Father's Day card...he looked over at my husband and said I have such a talented daughter!..
I just read Carole's reply. My father suffered from dementia as well . Isn't it interesting what sparks their memory. I always felt sooo great when my dad had those glimpses of reality. Hang in there. He does remember.
Joan
(((((( Carole ))))))) That is a touching and sweet moment - I'm glad your dad had such kind and tender words to share about your card made just for him. My dad had demetia and I remember how difficult those days were for us - Hang in there and lean on your family for support if you need it. I'll be thinking good thoughts and saying a prayer for you and yours.
Blessings,
Carol ~ Tres bien! Those were hysterical! I love the "Handmade just for you: dont just stand there staring at it" one, lol! I should look into these further. For these same said (ahem!) SIL that LOVES my home-made cards, lol!! ;)
First of all...This was a great topic! I have enjoyed reading what everyone wrote. When I first started making handmade cards I would be a bit sad if I didn't hear anything. Now, I really enjoy the process and if I hear something it's an added plus. If I am making one ...not giving from my stash..I do say a prayer for the person.
This is a great thread! I have found a lot of encouragement here. It is important to remember why we stamp in the first place. I really enjoy doing it, but sometimes it seems like so much trouble. For me it seems to take hours to come up with an original idea, and then when I do finally get one I make it and send it. It seems that people appreciate my cards and things I make them, but sometimes it is difficult to tell.
Something that I really have to work on is being okay when another stamper in the family makes something and gives it to someone that I did too and the recipient oohs and aahs over their card or handmade item and mine isn't acknowledged or gets a that is nice...
This is something that God has really helped me with because it used to be too big of a deal when this happened, but now usually i am able to be okay with it and just be happy that I had fun making it!
I really enjoy making my cards but I have felt that there are people out there who really don't care. The 2 ways that I have "fixed" this for myself: at Christmas this year I am only going to make 40 handmade cards (instead of 75+). This will help me and I will use up some of the store bought cards that I have laying around from before I started maing my cards. The 2nd thing I do is that I have started making handmade tags. For the people that I really think don't care I use the tags. That way I didn't put quite so much effort in it but I still got to make them something- win/ win!
My MIL love's my cards..cherishes each one she receives and sparingly gives out those that I gift to her to send to her friends. I have her go through my boxes and pick as many as she thinks she'll need for a year..she always tells me she feels greedy for wanting so many..but
I love that she adores them and they make her feel good about sending cards to her friends. Her fixed budget wouldn't allow her to do so as freely if she had to purchase them. Now my mom..loves anything I make her, but she has also said that it's (stamps) much to limiting a medium for art to her tastes...she is an awesome artist but in a different venue than I am..I can paint in oil,watercolor,make awesome cakes,etc..but I choose stamping as my main art outlet..because I love it! So I make awesome Mom cards but save the extra supplies for my MIL.
Carol ~ Tres bien! Those were hysterical! I love the "Handmade just for you: dont just stand there staring at it" one, lol! I should look into these further. For these same said (ahem!) SIL that LOVES my home-made cards, lol!! ;)
I have a stamp that says `if it was a hallmark card it wouldnt look this good`
I also find making cards good therapy.
KEEP STAMPING!
You got that right! Before I started making cards, here's what happened when my dh received a card from anyone: He would not even LOOK at the card first, just turned it over to see how much it cost on the back.
He's not much better now, but he does look at the front of the ones I make, and there's no price on the back to look for.:mrgreen:
Oh my handmade cards to DH ALWAYS have a price on the back.... I think the last one cost $1,000,000,000. :mrgreen: good thing I am "in" with the card's creator!
as for the OP - I don't tend to get too many comments on my cards but funnily enough people tend to tell the DH:rolleyes: work that out!:lol:
and I have lost the post but for the person who had the moment of recognition from her father suffering with dementia - you made me tear up and want to give you a hug - that was so worth all the cards that have gone unloved.
I've been reading this thread off and on since it started but now I dont' feel so bad about commenting/venting. I recently made a thank-you card for my boyfriend for a birthday present he gave me in May -- a pearl necklace. We're only together about 8 months and I totally didn't expect it. It was super-emotional because he wanted it to replace my original pearls (and earrings) that were lost/stolen in a move last year. It was a horrible experience for me -- all my jewelry since the time I was born, and some baby photos, and some Jewish religious objects were in a box that somehow disappeared when I put all my stuff in storage while I was traveling for 3 months in New Zealand. In some ways I still feel it was my fault. Anyway, needless to say I had a total meltdown right there and he was so good about just letting me cry and talk it through. So I made him a manly thank-you card (in my gallery) and wrote some things about how thoughtful he is and how much I appreciate him blah blah blah. As an added bonus, the card is cased from his parents' gorgeous guest bathroom (which I wrote in the card to make him smile)
THREE WEEKS later, he calls and says, oh by the way, your card is here, it was in my car with other things I never opened. I thought, why is she sending me a card, it's SO SILLY for my girlfriend to send me a card.
Me: Speechless.
Thinking: Well I'll never do that again.
I'm not sure if it's because he was uncomfortable with the whole idea of me thanking him for a birthday present and for expressing my feelings in written words, or the whole idea of the card was unnecessary.
My feelings were so hurt, because besides from a birthday card I made him in December when we were just together 8 weeks, this was the first time I went out on a limb and made him a card. He knows I make cards but I don't think it means anything to him.
My best friend who is my partner in card-making fun, said it was a nice card and she appreciated my work. But I don't want to make him a card any more. Why should I.
But why I make cards in general is different. It's sort of like Zen meditation. Mindfulness. I'm thinking of each person as I make the card and thinking of all their good attributes and why I love them, and what they mean to me. I try to put some of those good vibes into my creations. I make them only for the people who would appreciate it. I've got beautiful note-cards I bought at the Metropolitan Museum in New York for everyone else. My parents save every card I've ever made for them, and my SIL has kept all the cards I've made for my little nieces.
My job is not too creative, and to be able to do this is really a Gift from the Universe. I'm so grateful I can express myself this way. But I guess I'll express myself this way to everyone but my boyfriend.
__________________ Now I see the secret of making of the best persons. It is to grow in the open air, and to eat and sleep with the earth. -- Walt Whitman
Give him time - you may break him in yet ;)... He sound like a thoughtful, caring guy and if he loves you then he loves all of you - creative card maker and all.
I think we've all had that happen at one time or another - my "handmade horror story" happened a few years ago when my BIL passed the bar exam. I had come up with this really clever card (well, to me at least! )... He opened it, glanced at it, opened the gift, and promptly crumpled the card up along with the wrapping paper. Let's just say that I don't spend time making him "nice" cards anymore!!
I think to myself that they must think it looks soooo professional if they fail to comment on the effort put into making the card, that gives me comfort. LOL. But I do think the pleasure is in the making too.
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I have a River City Rubberworks stamp that reads: This Better Not Go In the Trash! I stamp it on the back of every card. My pastor said, "See how she is...she gives you a beautiful card and then she THREATENS you!"
__________________ "Worry does not empty TOMORROW of its promises; it empties TODAY of its strength." Corrie ten Boom
Avatar is my "adopted-in-my-heart-daughter" Sunitha who lives in India.
I am with you Pidgemom! I buy a cheaper store card for those that do not appreciate the homemade cards, but those are the few that don't appreciate a lot of things in life as well.
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I also (with a tongue-in-cheek approach) "instruct" receivers who show a less-than-adequate (imo) response to one of my cards. It goes something like this: Oh no! The proper response is "ooh, ahh...it's the best card you've ever made!" Now, repeat after me.... It always gets a laugh and you would be surprised how many people remember this mantra and automatically say it when receiving my handmade creations! I've even answered the phone and been greeted by "ooh, ahh..."! Try it!
__________________ "Worry does not empty TOMORROW of its promises; it empties TODAY of its strength." Corrie ten Boom
Avatar is my "adopted-in-my-heart-daughter" Sunitha who lives in India.
I, too, make cards for our family, friends, and acqaintances and usually receive nice comments and if not, I'm OK with that. However, my stepdaughter (whom, btw, I love very much) has an odd practice with any card, whether homemade or store-bought...she doesn't verbally make any comment, just puts the card away and that's that! I can deal with that, too, but the last time really annoyed me. :(
I made a card for our 6-year-old's b-day (her daughter) and mailed it with a gift of money for granddaughter to "go shopping" (granddaughter's request). Sd opened the card herself and went to the store and bought something granddaughter needed. Our granddaughter never saw the card or the money...I know this because I asked her how she liked the balloon card and how she spent her money. She didn't know what I was talking about. Sd explained what she had done...I was totally speechless. DH and I will not mail granddaughter cards with money any more...we will actually buy and mail the gifts...without a gift receipt. LOL
To give SD the benefit of the doubt, she has always been very prompt at sending thank you's. And, to me, it's not worth hassling over with SD...I'm just passing it off as a momentary slip on her part.
__________________ naner Give thanks to the Lord; His mercy endures forever! It's not a mess! It's a work of art.
I have two SIL's - one doesn't acknowledge anything handmade and the other has commented "You made this? You must have too much time on your hands." I have deemed them both not cardworthy. They usually get whatever $store notecard I have on hand now. I don't need to be complimented - all I would expect is a thank you.
I hate that! I stay at home 3 year old twins and a 5 year old and I am a freelance writer/designer and when someone says "must be nice to have the time to craft" I say Turn off the TV get off your butt and make something! It's so rude for them to assume they their time is more precious and you have hours of free time when you know there probably couch jockeys from 8pm on! OK that was harsh, but I hear you sister! I'm getting off my soapbox now LOL!
I have a River City Rubberworks stamp that reads: This Better Not Go In the Trash! I stamp it on the back of every card. My pastor said, "See how she is...she gives you a beautiful card and then she THREATENS you!"
There are those that appreciate all the time and work you put into the card and those that have no idea what goes into them. Try to figure out who is who and only mail to the ones you think will appreciate them.
Yeah, I've decided that I don't need people to ooh and ahh. The real joy for me is making them. I like to pray for the person I'm making the card for while I make it, but I don't always do that.
Ditto, for me it is a ministry -- most times I do not even know the person who is getting the card. When someone mentions that so & so is down or ill, I will just ask for their address and send off a bit of cardstock.
I am very blessed though through the people I do know who get a card from me and they are so very appreciative... especially my sweet dh. :-D
Maybe we are missing something here - maybe we need a stamp that says "if you don't like this card or its not your "thing" let me know and I will avoid further harassment" or "I will make yours recyclable" etc....
Thanks for the inspiration. I never would have thought about praying for the person I am making a card for, what a great tool for my spiritual life. I hope you share that suggestion everywhere you go. God Bless you for sharing it with me.
__________________ this is my favorite quote,
Give a man a fish and feed him for a day. Teach a man to fish and feed him for life.
