This is such a personal page I almost didn't share it. But then, I think that's why I am sharing it, because I may not be the only person who has gone through something like this.
I donít even know how to address you. Are you Grandma Gail? Are you
my former stepmom of 21 years? Everything has changed. in the last
year. When you left my dad, you had a lot of choices. You could have
remained in our lives. But you have chosen to walk away from us. And at
first, I was really sad. For us. For my daughters. I really hurt because
I wanted them to know you. I wanted them to have a special bond with
you and I was sad for what they will be missing out on.
But as time has passed, my girls have thrived. Theyíre fine. They have
Keith and I. They have each other. And they have other grandparents
who have stepped in and filled the void you left behind. Katie has never
known you. You left when she was a year old. And at 2, she has no memory
that you were ever a part of her life. And Libby has forgotten you. She
doesnít remember the things you did when she was younger. She has a
new Grandma, Grandma Cindy. And Grandma Cindy has given her joy.
My pain has changed. I used to lament the things that my girls were
missing with you. But now I hurt on your behalf. Surely it must hurt to know
that your grandchildren donít know who you are? Surely it must
be hard for you to know that you are missing out on the delight and joy
of two adorable little girls?
I donít know what it is like to be you. I donít know how you made the choices
you did. But I do know that weíre okay. We made it through to the other
side of this and weíre moving forward. We had months of hurt, months
of pain, but we have forgiven. And I wish that things had been different.
But I know that we are not the ones missing out here. You are. And I
just wonder if you know what youíve really given up?
Date: Thursday, July 20, 2006 GMT Views: 580
Registered: April 18, 2005 Location: Somewhere over the rainbow... Posts: 1091
Thu, Jul 20, 2006 @ 7:56 AM
Thank you soooo much for sharing. I started crying when I read this. It brought back so many memories/feelings for me. My daughter's father left when she was just 6 months old. He just decided he didn't want to be a part of our lives anymore. So I understand your pain.
She is now 8 and has no memory of him as he has never contacted us in anyway. She asks me about him often lately and it's hard to explain to her.
I could go on an on I guess, but my point was that sharing your personal page was brave, and there ARE a lot of us that can relate!!
I'm glad that you have been able to move on!! Take care.
Registered: January 20, 2005 Location: Buffering.... Buffering...next to Okiechic :) Posts: 15053
Thu, Jul 20, 2006 @ 8:47 AM
(((HUGS))) to you mamak...I remember sending her a card, and that you were so upset when things were happeneing. I'm glad to see you are getting through the pain, and knowing that SHE is the one missing out.