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Old 03-02-2008, 10:22 AM   #1  
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Default Memorial/Teen Death layout ideas??

Hello ladies, my name is Kristen & I am a longtime lurker, but first time poster. I have learned so much from all of you, and I am hoping you can help me again, for a much less happy layout.

My 15yo DD broke up with her BF of 2 months last Wednesday night. Within hours he had committed suicide. She is very upset and we are trying to help her all we can. We have done the obvious "it's not your fault" ad nauseam, but she still feels horribly guilty. She says she knows logically she is not responsible, but still emotionally feels responsible. We all know how hard it is to get the mind & the heart to agree. Counseling will be the next step as well.

DD has some photos of her BF and I asked if she might want to use them in some sort of scrapbook project as therapy, and she said she was interested. However, I don't know where to start... Does anyone have any good tribute/memorial layout examples they can share? Or sites w/examples? I have been unable to find any so far...

Thank you in advance so very much -

Kristen
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Old 03-02-2008, 11:20 AM   #2  
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OMG...this is so incredibly sad. I don't have any real samples but maybe something just highlighting the good times...the joyous occasions...just something like Remembering Our Time at *blank*

Good luck. I can't even begin to imagine the heartbreak. She's in for a long ride and hopefully a good counselor can help her heal.
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Old 03-04-2008, 03:26 AM   #3  
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Default Some ideas

I'm incredibly sorry for her loss and the entire situation. I agree scrapbooking can be therapeutic, but timing needs to be when she is ready.

here are some sites I found:
http://www.princesscrafts.com/scrapb...book-pages.htm

http://www.scrapjazz.com/topics/Themes/Memorial/168.php


These are examples, but my personal feeling is start with a suggested layout, but try to keep it away from being "dreary". This is an unusual situation as it is always so difficult to lose people so young and in such a tragic situation. Creative Keepsakes has great layout books as well - I just bought one for a reference book for my Mom to use for ideas. You can also search in Google for scrapbook layout ideas. Another great book of layouts is Cherish - can be found at Borders, Amazon, Barnes&Noble, and apparently Walmart (online at least)
Hardcover: Cherish: Scrapbook Layouts Made Beautifully Simple
Publisher: Gibbs Smith
Publish date: Jun 2006
ISBN-13: 9781423601548
ISBN-10: 1423601548
Format: Hardcover , 128 pages

more generic layouts:
http://www.alysta.com/stamping/scrapboo.htm

Hope this helps!
Linda
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Old 03-04-2008, 03:11 PM   #4  
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Thank you ladies so much for the replies, it is much appreciated. Linda, I agree that timing can be everything & she will do this at her own pace. We got photos developed, and she has looked at them quite a bit. We bought some supplies and she picked out a 8x8 album & papers in colors that reminded her of him.

She asked me today if she should include his obit... I told if she wanted to she could, as this was a memory book by & for her. She said she thought it was a good idea. So she is thinking about it and that makes me happy, as I hope it means she is dealing with her feelings & that will help her heal. Thursday is the funeral (open casket), and this is her first one. Its gonna be a tought day for us all...
Thanks again for all the ideas & support.

Kristen
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Old 03-29-2008, 10:23 AM   #5  
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I completed a memory album for my parents. I placed only pics that show them in a happy pose. Combined pics with some vintage 50's tags & nice stickers. I included some things that they said to me over the years by journaling them around the pages. Hope your daughter does get that professional help because in the long term, she will need it. Our daughter was the friend of a girl with a similar tragedy; my sincere sympathy.
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Old 04-16-2008, 07:20 PM   #6  
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I am so sorry to hear of your daughter's loss.
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Old 04-22-2008, 10:38 AM   #7  
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The only caution I would have with this project is that it be a crutch for her guilt. Also, it is becoming "popular" to photograph a funeral. I wouldn't let her include any photos of him in the coffin or anything from that day. It should celebrate his life and their friendship.
I will pray for both your families as your hearts heal and life goes on.
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Old 05-08-2008, 05:11 PM   #8  
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Kristen,

My heart goes out to your family and community. I think a scrapbook is a wonderful idea for your DD. I think she should include any pictures that she feels connected to. I don't think the scrapbook has to all be happy, esp to be theraputic. His death is going to affect her forever. The funeral will affect her forever. I think if she feels compelled to include things from this day, by all means let her. A therapist could then help her process the scrapbook and the feelings that it invokes in her.

Many hugs to you and your daughter. You will be in my thoughts.
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Old 05-22-2008, 04:58 AM   #9  
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Hi, Kristen,
I am so sorry for the pain your daughter (and your entire family) in having to endure right now. As a pastoral counselor, allow me to recommend a resource that I believe will be immensely beneficial to you and your daughter now - and in the future. "Adolescents in Crisis" by G. Wade Rowatt is the book I turn to again and again to remind myself of the developmental, emotional, and social issues that our children live with. Grief, peer pressure, and other issues are addressed in a sensitive, authoritative manner. (Wade Rowatt happens to be one of my seminary profs and he's such a caring professional.)

As for your layouts, I'd suggest pages that contain one or two larger photos along with a vertical or horizontal matted space for journaling. Putting feelings into words can limit the power they have over us. This also allows her to LITERALLY have "the last word" that her former boyfriend tried to take from her. Keeping a daily journal may help her express some of the feelings she may not want to make a part of the photo album, but still get 'em out and on paper.

I wish you and your family God's shalom during these trying days. May you be comforted by God's Spirit of grace and love.
Lisa Wood
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