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Old 05-25-2005, 12:29 PM   #1
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Exclamation Vasectomy card

Hi Everyone!

I'm looking for ideas for a humorous card for an awesome guy who is going to get "fixed". Any suggestions? Any funny things I can write on the inside?
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Old 05-25-2005, 12:39 PM   #2
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Emily recommends something along the lines of "heard your boys were getting a little crazy and they needed a muzzle?"

I'm not feeling it but I thought I'd throw it out there

We're chatting.... we'll be back with more
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Old 05-25-2005, 12:50 PM   #3
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there are some in the gallery, or there used to be. Try a search!

My husband wanted no card. . . just his jock strap, some ice, a vicodin, and his favorite tv channel.
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Old 05-25-2005, 12:53 PM   #4
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Okay, scratch the gallery search. Vas just gave me a buncha vases; vasectomy, nothing. I know there was a thread last year about the Big V. . . .
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Old 05-25-2005, 12:56 PM   #5
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Happy Neutering Day!

Or a retirement card??
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Old 05-25-2005, 01:13 PM   #6
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mamak, I thought for sure you'd have a set for this! You have "gangsta greetings", but nothing for the big snip?
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Old 05-25-2005, 01:15 PM   #7
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How about a Truck and a Wrench on the front of the card with the saying "Hear you're getting fixed"..........

He'll get it.....

Sue
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Old 05-25-2005, 01:16 PM   #8
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You could enclose a little ice pack as well. (this help with the pain)

Sue
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Old 05-25-2005, 01:17 PM   #9
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How about a card that says "What's Hanging?"
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Old 05-25-2005, 01:26 PM   #10
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *AStampinFool*
How about a Truck and a Wrench on the front of the card with the saying "Hear you're getting fixed"..........

He'll get it.....

Sue
Ha! I like this one!
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Old 05-25-2005, 02:18 PM   #11
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How about a pic of you with a big smile & a blurb about him being adjusted for "recreational use only" now.
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Old 05-25-2005, 02:28 PM   #12
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In Fruit Medley there are two cherries hanging from stems. Use your imagination
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Old 05-25-2005, 03:21 PM   #13
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Quote:
Originally Posted by *AStampinFool*
How about a Truck and a Wrench on the front of the card with the saying "Hear you're getting fixed"..........

He'll get it.....

Sue
I like this one too, just right. The ice pack would be a nice touch.
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Old 05-25-2005, 03:43 PM   #14
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How about this? My DH always calls it Man Land....

"I heard they were working on the plumbing down in Man Land....

(open up the card)

I hope they got all the leaks sealed"


I'm desperately trying to talk the DH into a vasectomy, but he won't let anyone go near him with a knife, let alone down in Man Land!!! Post a picture of it when you get it done so we can ooooohhhh and ahhhhhh over it!!!
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Old 05-25-2005, 04:58 PM   #15
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How about one of the dog stamps and fashion one of those cones around its neck like the pups have to wear when the get fixed?
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:11 PM   #16
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Disneywed
How about one of the dog stamps and fashion one of those cones around its neck like the pups have to wear when the get fixed?
now that is funnyl.
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:13 PM   #17
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Hey there's nothin' wrong with shooting blanks, it makes for great target practice!!!!!
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:41 PM   #18
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You girls are so funny! I wish I could think of something funny to add, but I can't. Thanks for the great laugh!
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:50 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by prhansen
How about this? My DH always calls it Man Land....

"I heard they were working on the plumbing down in Man Land....

(open up the card)

I hope they got all the leaks sealed"


I'm desperately trying to talk the DH into a vasectomy, but he won't let anyone go near him with a knife, let alone down in Man Land!!! Post a picture of it when you get it done so we can ooooohhhh and ahhhhhh over it!!!
I TRULY hope you are requesting a picture of the CARD!!! HEE HEE!

I know Raelene gave a friend of ours a sympathy card. I thought that was pretty funny!

JOcelyn
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:52 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Disneywed
How about one of the dog stamps and fashion one of those cones around its neck like the pups have to wear when the get fixed?
Okay, this has me rolling around laughing! I can just see it!

Hm. I have got to talk dh into one of these, if for no other reason than the humour involved! I'd say poor men but after what I went through to get my kids into this world, poor man my a#$%!

Jocelyn
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Old 05-25-2005, 05:56 PM   #21
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Quote:
Originally Posted by JocelynM
I TRULY hope you are requesting a picture of the CARD!!! HEE HEE!

JOcelyn


ROTFLMAO!!!! Can you tell I didn't re-read my post before I submitted it? YES - I'm requesting a pic of the CARD!!! I can't stop laughing!!!
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Old 05-25-2005, 06:04 PM   #22
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Quote:
Originally Posted by prhansen
ROTFLMAO!!!! Can you tell I didn't re-read my post before I submitted it? YES - I'm requesting a pic of the CARD!!! I can't stop laughing!!!
OH THANK GOODNESS!!!! I was afraid to continue looking at this post for fear I would see something I really did not want or need to see!! I can breathe easy now and no longer live in fear!

Jocelyn
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Old 05-26-2005, 07:34 AM   #23
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Exclamation 24 hours until surgery

You guys have been a huge help and inspiration! I'm thinking of using SU Fabulous Fruits (watermelon & grapes) with a thanks for going seedless. Throwing around the idea of putting the peach upside down with a happy face on the inside (it kinda resembles the boys!). What do you think of those ideas?
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Old 05-26-2005, 08:51 AM   #24
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I made my neighbor a card topper with some nuts in it, and the topper said "Thought you might me needing these" and on the other side I put "got nuts?" He laughed but not as hard as his wife!!!
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Old 05-26-2005, 08:59 AM   #25
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Default Vasectomy

I think the watermelon and grapes card you came up with sounds really cute - plus you thoufht of it yourself! Hope all goes well - be SURE to have the tests done when needed for the sperm count levels - VERY important!
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Old 05-26-2005, 09:14 AM   #26
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When my husband made his v trip I found a card (yes a store bought card, it was the prestamping days) that had a bear on the front with a band aid on him. I think it was suppose to be on his belly but it was sitting a little low on the belly. I had to get it. I can't remember what it said on the inside. I think the front summed it up.
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:04 PM   #27
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How about...
"You're a cut above the rest"
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:22 PM   #28
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great ideas esp. the band-aid bear ("Fav. Teddy"?)and the target practice!lots of target practice! LOL!
how about:
"no more nappies, no more spit
just lots more late nights
... gettin' IT?"
(I'm a poet & I didn't know it 'til I started to show it hope I dont blow it!)

let's make this a challenge !ROTFLMAO!!!!

how about:
A toast to me!(the wife)
and never having to "labour under a MISCONCEPTION"
AGAIN!
-------Thanks Honey !
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Old 05-26-2005, 12:56 PM   #29
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ROTFLMAO!!!!


You gotta use the "man land" phrase though!! Too funny!!!
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Old 05-26-2005, 02:28 PM   #30
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How about a stamp of a big (hehe) gun and a box of ammo that says "blanks"
No need for words inside, I think that would get the message across.
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Old 05-26-2005, 04:28 PM   #31
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DH suggests a picture of a baby with a big red no sign through it. Like "no smoking" signs except with a baby.
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Old 05-27-2005, 12:37 AM   #32
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StamperedChef
How about a stamp of a big (hehe) gun and a box of ammo that says "blanks"
No need for words inside, I think that would get the message across.
Too funny!! My dh calls it "blowing up the bridge that the little men march across".

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Old 05-27-2005, 03:01 PM   #33
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How about "No More Swimmers" my brother had a reversal done and called me and said I have Swimmers!!!!
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Old 05-27-2005, 04:51 PM   #34
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When a friend of ours finally decided (after many requests from his wife) to go in for a vasectomy, he made a card for her that had a piece of string running through the middle of the card & when you opened it, a pair of scissors unfolded & came down to snip the string & said "I've decided to get the big snip".

Couldn't believe what a good job he had done making the card.
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Old 05-27-2005, 05:21 PM   #35
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I like the grapes and watermelon idea.

"A weed from a seed will grow,
What you reap is what you sow.
Thanks to you my garden's weedless,
You're a dear for going seedless!"
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Old 05-28-2005, 01:20 PM   #36
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If this person is a very private person then any card might be embarrassing for him! (unless it's Hubby)
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Old 05-28-2005, 02:20 PM   #37
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Hubby suggested a pair of oranges with the title of Funkist and below "All juice, no seeds"

;P
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Old 05-29-2005, 05:29 AM   #38
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Quote:
Originally Posted by serialpurrs
Hubby suggested a pair of oranges with the title of Funkist and below "All juice, no seeds"

;P
Now THAT is funny!
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Old 05-29-2005, 06:30 AM   #39
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LOL,,,, It is really true,,,,,, we will make a card for any occassion,,,,,, LOL,,
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Old 05-29-2005, 08:39 PM   #40
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Quote:
Originally Posted by BakerJoe
I like the grapes and watermelon idea.

"A weed from a seed will grow,
What you reap is what you sow.
Thanks to you my garden's weedless,
You're a dear for going seedless!"
you're a better poet than I !
and I love the FUNKIST one too !

I used to sell fancy women'swear and certain classic pieces were suitable for "weddings,funerals and job interviews" why should our cards be any less versatile ? I'm pretty sure some of those short skirts went out to bars and even home on hot dates with inappropriate men ! LOL!!! there's ALL sorts of senses of humour I'm sure that anyone's could be pleased, despite the pain and embarrassment, to have some kind of acknowledgement !
Winnie-the-Pooh says "no one is ever uncheered by a ballon"
it is just the same with handstamped love tokens .
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