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Hi all - thanks for reading. OK, so, one of my friends at work was talking a couple days ago about how he scheduled a prenatal massage, manicure, and pedicure for his wife for her birthday and that he didnt know how to surprise her with it. I offered to make a card for her with a little coupon/certificate type thing about the spa package. So I did. And I was SO excited with how it turned out - and it took a lot of time...it was great. SO I brought it in the next day and handed him the card (inside it's envelope, which was stamped and the flap was covered in coordinating paper), he took it, said "thanks" and just set it on the desk. He didn't even take it out of the envelope and look at it!!! And he didnt say anything during the rest of the day that he looked at it or anything... :-( I was so excited b/c I thought I did a great job for his wife...
Here are links to the different parts of the card:
You card and coupon are beautiful. I can see it must have taken quite a bit of time and work. Some people are just not "card-worthy" and don't appreciate the time and talent it takes to create hand-made custom cards. Perhaps when his wife receives it and enjoys it, he will get a better understanding.
I don't think it's a "man thing". Maybe he's under a little stress, and just wasn't really thinking (not that it's an excuse). I know I would have said "Hey, aren't you even going to look at it?", but that's just me.
I think it is a man thing! Men just don't take the time to look at the details. My hubby does the same thing and it drives me nuts. The card is beautiful--know that the wife is going to love it and appreciate it!
I think it is a man thing. A lot of the men I know would react the same way. They don't appreciate a great card like yours. Next time, tell him to go buy a one. Then he might at least have to look at the front of the card.
What a beautiful card! I am sure his wife will just love all of it...the card and the gift. I DO think it is a man thing...in my house, if it doesn't have to do with fishing or guns, there really isn't much interest!
I guess it's a man thing, but it's still a little rude. I think it looks fantastic though!!! His wife is probably going to wonder where he got such an awesome card. Very very cute.
It's beautiful! The guy's wife is going to be so surprised. I hope that when she asks, "where did you get this lovely card, honey," he will say, "My Friend Amazing Card-Maker at Work made it for you" and then you will get your props. It is definitely a man thing. I made a thank-you card for my boyfriend and he didn't even tell me it arrived until 2 weeks later and was totally off-handed about it. I think some men believe we fold construction paper like their toddlers and that's a card. Many men have no aesthetic sense. Too bad for them....
Don't stress about it. Know that you did something so nice for someone. And that's a very good feeling!
__________________ Now I see the secret of making of the best persons. It is to grow in the open air, and to eat and sleep with the earth. -- Walt Whitman
I think it's a man thing. Even if he did take it out and look at it, even if he did think it was fantastic (which it totally is), he probably would have muttered a few words and left it at that. Not like a woman who would be oohing and aahing over it. I'm sure his wife will love it!!
I know how disappointed and unappreciated you're feeling. The same thing happened to me. I made a Birthday card for my DH's best friend. I spent a lot of time to make it a very special card. I watercolored a sailing scene and used twinkling H2O's on the frame. It was a couple of years ago and I still feel it was one of the best cards I have ever done. I had showed it to some stamping friends when it was finished and they all loved it. I had even asked for help on this forum to find out how to write Happy Birthday in russian since that was the friend's native language. When he got the card he barely glanced at it. It probably went in the trash after we left.
I don't think that he was a bad person or that it was a "man thing". I think what it comes to is that some people don't understand and appreciate handmade cards. Some people even feel more honored that you spent money on a Hallmark card. They don't think about the fact that you spent hours or days creating a work of art just for them. Since that experience I have quit creating my cards for everyone and only give my special works of art to those who I think will appreciate them.
Don't stress about it. Know that you did something so nice for someone. And that's a very good feeling!
Thank you - you are so right about that! I do feel good that I did something nice, and I know it turned out well, I don't need his approval! I'm sure his wife liked it.
I would feel unappreciated too...and then call my GF...and she would tell me the latest stupid thing her hubby did...and then i would decide it was worse than what happened to me...
The guy's sister-in-law probably told him what to get his wife for her B-day, and was taking credit at work for being so 'thoughtful'. And you KNOW when his wife gets the card and gift she is going to be thinking WHO HELPED YOU DO SOMETHING SO NICE???
__________________ Cher No longer stamping...on to bigger things.
I was wondering if this is his first baby? I remember my husband when our first one was on the way...he was STRESSED! That may be one reason he was a little whacked out when you gave him the card. Pregnant women are not easy to life with sometimes :-) He does seem like a nice guy because that is an awesome gift for his wife...so maybe cut him a little slack. I have found that people who make cards themseles appreciate handmade cards more than others because they realize the time, though and effort of each technique you put into it. Other people just say thanks and move on.
Don't let it get to you..just be proud of your beautiful card and yourself for being a great co-worker.
People who don't craft, especially men, have no clue what goes in to making a card. Even when you say it's handmade, they think you bought a kit and just assembled it or something.
They just don't know, so please don't be offended. It's adorable!
It's a man thing. She'll LOVE it!! My husband looks at the cards if I show them to him but he could take 'em or leave 'em. I put a lot of thought and effort into a card for his best friend's daughter's graduation, told him how proud I was to have finally come up with something appropriate.... he lost it. I had to remake it last night and I'm pretty sure it's not the same and it's sitting on his dresser now ~ I wonder how long it will take him to write in it this time LOL!!
I will say that I made a set of notecards for a good friend and when I got a thank you email from him, I replied that I was happy to have had the inspiration because it helped me to step out of my usual style. He replied "You made those notecards? Consider this notification of my standing order." Which is a HUGE compliment from him and I'll love to keep him supplied with cards! I made him a couple of greeting cards before and I bet it never occurred to him that they were handmade.
So I guess not all men are like that .... there was a great thread awhile back about wonderful ways husbands embrace, support and appreciate their wives' craft. Not mine LOL!! But, he's color deficient anyway so everything looks different to him ;) .
I'd give your coworker a bit of a break because of the baby coming and if he was at work maybe he was distracted from your card, etc., by his job ... who would have thought!?!
All I have to say is that if you had handed that card to my husband, he knows that he better take a good look at it and tell you how much he appreciated it. When I come back from places where I have made cards I always show them to him. Of course he isn't into cards, but he knows I am and he has seen how long it takes to make them so he is very aware of how much it means to me. Many people have no idea how much time and effort it takes to make some cards. I have found that getting my friends and family into my craft room and having them actually make a card helps them appreciate it when they recieve a card now.
I don't think its necessarily a "man thing" but he probably just doesn't know anything about handmade cards or the time that goes into making something as special as you did. I wouldn't take it personally, although I hope he did say "thank you"???
I will say that I made a set of notecards for a good friend and when I got a thank you email from him, I replied that I was happy to have had the inspiration because it helped me to step out of my usual style. He replied "You made those notecards? Consider this notification of my standing order."
I really think you hit the nail on the head. Usually when I give a card they get a lukewarm response, I mean, the cards are cute and all but they are completely different then the bright, flashy, musical cards from the store. Most people are not generally conditioned to see the value of handwritten notes and gifts anymore, so they don't get much of a look. But once they find it out it was hand-made, the recipient really freaks out. I think it means so much to receive something that was made especially for them. And even though the co-worker knows you made the card, that may not mean anything to him. He doesn't understand that you really "made" it, did all the cutting, coloring, embellishing, etc. KWIM?
Am I over-reacting? Is it just a man thing?
