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Old 09-08-2010, 04:52 AM   #1
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Hi there,

Just needing a little advice.

I don't participate in the creative criticism threads because that isn't why I'm here. If I want advice on selecting images etc then maybe I would but I like what I use alot and that's why I use it. I also have other people that I trust that will tell me if I have erred in making a card etc.

I just wondered how to respond to a comment left on one of my cards.

I was told that the image was not their thing but that they liked the card anyways.

I tried to take that as a compliment that I could get someone to like something I made even if they didn't like what I made it out of.

But to me that was what my home ec teacher called a marshmallow. A compliment that sounds sweet but is laced with something sticky that won't go away and makes you feel bad. And this sort of brought me down until I realised that I can just ignore the part where she said the image wasn't her thing.

She makes lovely cards herself and I have only ever left positive comments on hers. I was tempted to go leave a marshmallow for her but didn't. I just posted on one of her cards that she made a lovely card and thanked her for the comment on mine and that I took it as a compliment that she liked my card even though she didn't like the main image.

I mean I know that all the lovely, super, cute comments are sugar, pure sugar but I put my cards on here because I like them. I don't take the sugar too to heart either but I'm not posting to get told that people don't like my images. And the image wasn't offensive either. Just a little girl. She even had a nose and a mouth.

Images are a matter of taste. I would never go and comment on someones card that I didn't like their choice of image but liked the card anyways. It just felt a bit mean to me even though I'm sure that she never meant it that way at all.

I just felt I needed to respond to that comment. I try and comment on people who leave comments for me.

I'm rambling, sorry.

Like I said, I'm trying to take it as a compliment... Now I just have to let it go right???

What I did was the right thing to do wasn't it???
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Old 09-08-2010, 05:44 AM   #2
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I understand how comments can hurt and that's also not a comment I would personally make about some one's card but unless you are the artist of that particular image I wouldn't take too much offense to the comment.
I know it's hard but you're right to try to just let it go.
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Old 09-08-2010, 05:47 AM   #3
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I would just focus on the good things they said and take it as a compliment. For me the hardest part of making a card is picking the right colors and getting the layout right. I've seen lots of cards where I love how it was put together even if the stamped image isn't my style. It sounds like this person liked your creative part of the card so I'd be happy with that.
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:01 AM   #4
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It wasn't necessary and a bit off if you ask me! It would hurt me also. You are a good sport for leaving a nice comment for her!
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:10 AM   #5
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well....I probably would have been a little bit offended because I am kind of sensitive and proud of my cards that I share but then since I am on the outside of this I can see where she probably meant to say that she would have not normally thought that was a pretty image but that you are so talented (true) that you made it look beautiful
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:36 AM   #6
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I looked at the comment and the card in question and had a totally different reaction. her "criticism" wasn't of you -- it was of someone else's image.

of course I could be wrong, but I thought her comment was quite nice. She was basically saying. Hey, that's not my style, but nevertheless you took an image that I don't like and turned it into something wonderful.

to me that is the highest compliment!

in any event, i'm sorry that your feelings were hurt. the gallery can be a very difficult place sometimes...
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:44 AM   #7
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I agree with Joan. If I see something that is taken that is totally not my style, but you manage to make it into something I love, I think that's awesome!
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:54 AM   #8
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I agree that the comment was insensitive, but you're right to just let it go. It's amazing to me how some people in the SCS world just write whatever they think without any filters. I don't believe in censorship but really...what happened to common manners? I usually just figure they have a lot of issues and can get some relief here anonymously!!
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:55 AM   #9
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I would just take the comment as a compliment and let it go. She may not have expressed her comment well, or the most likely meaning is that even though it is an image she would not use, she really liked what you did with it. I personally don't think it was some type of backhanded compliment or "marshmallow" compliment. There are plenty of cards out there that I personally don't like the image, but love what was done with the card and image. Another thing is that it can be hard to convey or interrupt meaning of comments in cyberspace.

Now I am worried that I may have offended someone last year with one of my comments. It was a Halloween card made using the MS border punch with the rats. I made a comment something like "even though I hate rats I love your card." It was not meant to be a marshmallow comment at all. I am terribly afraid of all things rodents. They make my skin crawl to the point that it is my worst fear to be surrounded by rodents. Therefore, in my own card making I would never choose images with any type of mouse, rat etc. As we all know, there is a very popular line of stamps featuring a mouse. Not my thing, but I still have seen cards I like with those images. Now back to my comment... what I truly meant was that I loved that person's card using the MS punch so much that I would actually reconsider my refusal to purchase anything with a rodent and actually use that particular punch on my Halloween cards. Case in point of not expressing ones self well while trying to be succinct in my comment. Since that card maker didn't know me, she probably has very similar feelings about my comment as you do to yours. Again, just take it as a true compliment. I don't know many people on here that take the time to comment on a card unless they really like it.
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:59 AM   #10
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Oh, my. All of your cards are just gorgeous. You are so talented.
I would definitely take it as a compliment. I think the commenter loved your style and talent and realized that you could take any image and make it awesome.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:04 AM   #11
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I tend to agree with Joan, I read the comment and honestly I think she meant it in a positive way so take it as a compliment. It seems as though she just didn't care for the image itself, not your card. Try not to upset yourself.

I know how you feel because I had a comment about my cards (it was in a thread not in my gallery) and the person went on to say that there was nothing special about my cards and that anyone would be able to copy them. I was so hurt and VERY upset, but I ignored the comment in the thread and I just brushed it off.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:09 AM   #12
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Oh, I'm with Joan and Jenn. You created a beautiful card with an image that was not her style, but you drew her in with your talent, and you are very talented!! We don't all like the same images and that's okay. If she didn't like what you did, she probably wouldn't have commented at all. I would definitely take her comment as a *big* compliment, I'm sure she meant it that way

Sending hugs and I hope you have a good day.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:17 AM   #13
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Oh, I agree 100% with Joan!! My gosh girl, your work is awesome! I usually hang out on the SU Demo side and look mostly at those cards, but I'm glad I found your stuff through your thread here!

I also have to tell you that I went to your blog, and I looked at the card about your Gran (just LOVE the card), and read the story. You're not only a good stamper - you're a good WRITER!!! I was very touched about the story of your Gran - it made me miss my Grandma, whose been gone almost 20 years now! And my own mom, at age 90, is the one in the nursing home. Less than two months ago, my DD's and I took her out to lunch and told her that a new great-grandbaby is on the way. She was very with it. Now she doesn't know anyone but me, and doesn't remember her two great-grands or her 3 granddaughters. It's very sad... She does have a bladder infection, and I've been hoping that once that got resolved, her mental state would improve, but it hasn't happened yet. It's hard on my kids and it's hard on me.

But thanks for the lovely story and your lovely cards!
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:36 AM   #14
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I wouldn't let it bother you...I think it was meant as a compliment and would take it as such.

There are thousands of images out there for the simple fact that we all like something different. That image may not have appealed to this person but it was nice that she took the time to compliment your layout/design.

Now that said, I wouldn't point out if I liked or disliked a single image on a card if I liked the general card design but that's just me.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:44 AM   #15
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I think sometimes What is typed is not really the way it would appear if the person was standing in front of you talking.

I would take it as a compliment and not fret about it.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:50 AM   #16
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I think you need to stop over analyzing it and move on. You need to keep in mind that may times things said online are maybe not written in the way they are intended to come across. I would have seen that comment and not thought twice about it.
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Old 09-08-2010, 07:57 AM   #17
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I agree with Guitargerle. The comment about the image hits a sour note. Because it comes first, it carries more weight than the praise following. While the praise is specific about parts of the design, and that's fine, the whole comment seems a little acrid to me. The way I'd find comfort here is in the touch of envy conveyed. Your cards are beautiful, lively and very professional! It's natural to envy your talent.
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Old 09-08-2010, 01:52 PM   #18
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Oh dear - that was me, wasn't it! I am truly sorry if it left you with a *marshmallow* feeling - that was most certainly NOT my intention. What I meant was that even though the stamp wasn't my style, I DID like the card. And that is a compliment. It's just as well we all don't like the same style - I am all for Vive la Difference, the world would be very boring if everything was the same.
I'd better not say any more in case I dig a deeper hole (because what we write doesn't always come across as we mean it to, even if we take time to think and edit and re-write), but please accept my apologies for in any way causing offence.
And I'd better not comment on any more Halloween cards either.
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Old 09-08-2010, 04:01 PM   #19
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Quote:
Originally Posted by LaLatty View Post
I tend to agree with Joan, I read the comment and honestly I think she meant it in a positive way so take it as a compliment. It seems as though she just didn't care for the image itself, not your card. Try not to upset yourself.

I know how you feel because I had a comment about my cards (it was in a thread not in my gallery) and the person went on to say that there was nothing special about my cards and that anyone would be able to copy them. I was so hurt and VERY upset, but I ignored the comment in the thread and I just brushed it off.

Oh I'm so sorry. That was mean of them to say that about your cards. I've seen your cards and they are lovely.

I think you are all right that the comment was likely meant as you've said and just came out funny in cyber space.

Thanks for all the comments.
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Old 09-08-2010, 04:12 PM   #20
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Cook22 View Post
Oh dear - that was me, wasn't it! I am truly sorry if it left you with a *marshmallow* feeling - that was most certainly NOT my intention. What I meant was that even though the stamp wasn't my style, I DID like the card. And that is a compliment. It's just as well we all don't like the same style - I am all for Vive la Difference, the world would be very boring if everything was the same.
I'd better not say any more in case I dig a deeper hole (because what we write doesn't always come across as we mean it to, even if we take time to think and edit and re-write), but please accept my apologies for in any way causing offence.
And I'd better not comment on any more Halloween cards either.
Sabrina,
I sent you a PM...
I think I was too sensitive and I'm sorry I over-reacted. I guess I was still upset about something else and not in the right mood.
Please accept my apologies for not seeing what everyone else here has kindly pointed out to me. That you liked my card DESPITE the fact that you aren't into large headed goggle-eyed girls wearing old fashioned clothes. And all of that is said tongue in cheek.
I like the Magnolias and those sorts of stamps. Obviously I guess because I use them. But I do know that lots of people don't.
Anyways... I'll stop now because I think I've already dug myself a big enough hole. And I may be naive but I honestly never expected all of you to troupe off and find the post I was talking about. Lesson learned for me I guess to not be so sensitive and try and see a compliment is a compliment and not a marshmallow.
Now let's just let this thread die a natural death OK.
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:01 PM   #21
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I think it is right that u let it go. I can understand how u feel but the other party may not mean anything bad about it. Sometimes I like a card's layout and embellishments used to decorate it but don't like the image. That doesn't mean the person who created it is lousy. I don't like Tilda images but alot of other people like it. I find housemouse images cute but the cards that I made with it nobody wants to buy.
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Old 09-08-2010, 06:12 PM   #22
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I don't think she meant anything bad from the comment (I just read it and didn't feel that at all). Honestly? Some of the stamps out there aren't everyone's thing. I was in the -- I don't even know how to describe it but, let's just say you had to have a thick skin and a great sense of humor. I was almost embarrassed at the images I received in that swap. I did not even show my husband!!! However, the workmanship was awesome. I moved a few things around on the cards and used all but one. That one I still have because it is such a good idea.

Your work was very nice and the compliment/comment was not what you think. I read it as she liked it but those stamps are 'not her thing'--that's all.

And, thank you for spelling advice correctly. That 'advise' for 'advice' thing lately is driving me crazy!
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