What kind of card do you send....
 

...when a friend's husband commits suicide? This is a good friend from work whose husband I never met. I just can't imagine what kind of card to make. Any help would be appreciated. Thanks.

Maybe a "thinking about you" card? I'm not sure, I've never had to do one for that ... but at least she will know that you are thinking about her ... kind of like a sympathy-type card with flowers or something on the front ... that's what I would probably do.

I have an old stamp that says Gentle Thoughts for Difficult Times, which would be perfect. My husband's brother committed suicide. Trust me, this woman will not care what the card says as long as it is heartfelt. She isn't going to notice the details, but she will remember that you cared enough to send a card. Most folks find it horribly difficult to acknowledge a death that is also a suicide, so kudos for you for not ignoring this.

I think any kind of Sympathy, Thinking of You will work, especially with a note that says you are thinking of her and realize that this is a very difficult time..

Wow-that would be a tough one. A lot depends on how good a friend she is, I think. I guess I would just send a "thinking of you" card and say something on the inside like "I'm so very, very sorry to hear about your loss. I don't know what to say other than to let you know that my heart goes out to you and to remind you that you have friends like me who care about you. I am only a phone call away." Or whatever.

If you know her fairly well, and you don't think she would take it wrong, you might do a little research to see if there are any resources in your community (support groups?) for family/friends of people who have committed suicide. There is often a lot of misplaced guilt by the "survivors." You could confirm time and place and volunteer to go with her, or just send her the information in a card in a couple of weeks.

Maybe someone out there who has more direct experience with this has some better suggestions to offer.

Good luck.

a nice condolence card. You don't have to get specific. maybe something simplistic and sweet. I've seen a few done w/ flowers. The support and kind words is what's really going to shine throw too :)
Sorry for your friend's loss. It must be hard for her....

shine through... not throw... ugh with the typos!!
sorry

Thank you for your suggestions - they were a big help. I am combining a little of each suggestion into the card. Thanks so much.

I had the same situation a couple months ago. I sent a Sympathy card at the time as I thought that's the most appropriate for a death in the family. At Christmas time I sent a "Thinking of You" card because I figured that would be a hard time for her. People always need TLC in the months following a death when the numbness has worn off and the memories are flooding in.:(

I actually had this happen a few years ago. She is a good friend and co-worker and I knew her husband a little bit. There are no words, really, so a "thinking of you" simple card is best. Once she realizes your genuine care and concern for her by this gesture, what she may really need is a lot of hugs and heartfelt talks. At least that's what my friend needed. She just didn't know who she could talk to about this - no one seems to want to talk about it. But once she received my small note, she knew I was willing. Just my experience...

I like the idea of a simple sympathy card now, and then sending her a thinking of you card in the future. I believe it would be a comfort to know that others are still keeping "you" in their thoughts and prayers.

Nancy

I lost my brother to suicide three years ago, and I can tell you that every card, every kind word, every gesture was very much appreciated, no matter what. Any kind of thinking of you or sympathy card will work just fine. An organization that my family has come to support a lot is the American Foundation for Suicide Prevention - www.afsp.org - a contribution in memory of your friend's husband would be a nice gesture if that's the kind of thing you like to do.

Just send something. I had no idea until I lost someone how much those cards really mean to a person. I now send every single time no matter how hard the circumstances are.