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-   -   well... you have a job... (https://www.splitcoaststampers.com/forums/general-stamping-talk-17/well-you-have-job-169422/)

cutiepatutie 07-28-2006 08:25 AM

well... you have a job...
 
Not sure if this is where I post this, but... I have been trying to get a stamp club together for sometime and finally was able to get everyone in the same room. We are talking about the minimum, which is going back and forth between $40-$50/month. I don't think that is unreasonable to spend on stamps. We want the 400 buck hostess benni and that is what we have to spend to get that. Well, one of the ladies said to me "it's easy for you, you have a job." I'm so sick of hearing that. Yes, I do have a job, but you can get a job too! Don't use that lame *** excuse and don't put *your* money issues back on me because you choose not to work! And... if this was such a problem for her, why on earth did she show up for the meeting?? I just don't understand some people.... She did join, but I don't know why.

ok- so I'm done, flame me if you must. :???:

j

sma499 07-28-2006 08:34 AM

She must not have that much of a problem if she joined. People can say nasty things unintentionally.

I have a job, but I couldn't afford a $40-50 commitment every month.

LeahsCreations 07-28-2006 08:43 AM

Personally, I think that's a high commitment EVERY month whether you have a job or not.

Did you see the Friends episode in Season 2(?) where Rachel, Joey and Phoebe don't have as much money as the other three? The Haves forget what it's like to be the Have-Nots; meanwhile, the Have-Nots hate not being able to do stuff so they do it and suffer the consquences.

I'm not justifying what she said, but I think she was just tying to say that it's going to be a stretch for her but she does want to play.

jewelchicdesigns 07-28-2006 08:58 AM

Does she have another friend not in the group that would like to split the $ amount with her. Yes she would have to share her bennies with them but she could play without breaking her bank. I work, and for our area I have a pretty good paying job, however even as a demo I don't have an extra $40/mo the spend on stuff. If I weren't a demo I couldn't justify spending $ on that to my fiance, and I do work full time! Did she know the $ requirement when she signed up?

craftygirl04 07-28-2006 09:07 AM

Have job...Couldn't afford $40-50 a month. Sorry, it's too steep for me.

sassyat30 07-28-2006 09:13 AM

NO way could I afford $50 every single month...too much for me!

jlcghs27408 07-28-2006 09:31 AM

I don't think it's too much. If she's that interested in stamping she probably pays that much for stamps every month anyway.

I don't really know what kind of stamp club you're talking about, but I'm gathering that every month a different member is the hostess. So if she leaves, does the price go up for everyone?

Also, if she can't afford it, then oh well - she can't join. If she really wants to, you're right, she can get a job.

I have friends that don't have any money, or a desire to work, and it irks me!!!!!! It wouldn't bother me, except when they complain about money problems or how they can't do anything fun. Um hello? Get money like everybody else? We're aren't heiresses!

sassyat30 07-28-2006 09:57 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by jlcghs27408
I don't think it's too much. If she's that interested in stamping she probably pays that much for stamps every month anyway.

I don't really know what kind of stamp club you're talking about, but I'm gathering that every month a different member is the hostess. So if she leaves, does the price go up for everyone?

Also, if she can't afford it, then oh well - she can't join. If she really wants to, you're right, she can get a job.

I have friends that don't have any money, or a desire to work, and it irks me!!!!!! It wouldn't bother me, except when they complain about money problems or how they can't do anything fun. Um hello? Get money like everybody else? We're aren't heiresses!

It isn't that we don't have any money or no desire to work ...it's that I don't think $50 a month is a very reasonable request for a stamp club. I never spend that much on supplies every single month! I usually make one or two large orders ($150) a YEAR...big difference there.

But, if she knew that ahead of the meeting, and still showed up, then why would she bother. BUT, if the amount was sprung on her at the meeting, then I think she had every right to not join.

cutiepatutie 07-28-2006 10:20 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sassyat30
It isn't that we don't have any money or no desire to work ...it's that I don't think $50 a month is a very reasonable request for a stamp club. I never spend that much on supplies every single month! I usually make one or two large orders ($150) a YEAR...big difference there.

But, if she knew that ahead of the meeting, and still showed up, then why would she bother. BUT, if the amount was sprung on her at the meeting, then I think she had every right to not join.

$40 bucks a month is very reasonable, IMO. That will buy someone 2-3 stamp sets a month from the cattie. This is something that we (all the potential members) discussed 2 months in ADVANCE. We all want the $400 benefit, and we are all willing to pay $40/month to get that. So... $40/month is a non issue, or should be at least.

I guess I needed to add some history, she has been telling me for a month that she just can't find $40 worth of stuff to buy. So... where does the "you have a job" comment come in? If the problem is that she doesn't want anything in the cattie, then she shouldn't join the club. If it's that she doesn't have the money to spend, then she should get a job or shouldn't join the club. But... she shouldn't make me look like the bad guy because I have a job and can easily spend $40 a month of stamps. My budget is actually more and I'm sure it will net her a nice little hostess beni.

ndeelou 07-28-2006 10:48 AM

So the point is if she wishes to join or not. what she chooses to spend her forty dollars per month on is her business (stamps. groceries. child care. alcohol. vacations. rent. manicures. cigarettes. clothes, tuition, gas,,_)
Just as your CHOICE to COMMIT forty dollars each month to stamp club is YOUR decision. But she could gracefully bow out as "not able to join at this time" without making a big deal in front of the other players who have already decided they want the four hundred dollar benefits (and not the one fifty bennies)

Good luck. hope she follows thru..

betsy

LeahsCreations 07-28-2006 10:48 AM

Based on what you've written, it sounds like this woman caved to peer pressure because she wants to be in the club. Also, based on what you've said, I would fully expect her to flake out in the near future.

boobookittysgranny 07-28-2006 11:12 AM

If she can't afford the $40, then she shouldn't join but she shouldn't make you feel bad because you can afford the money. I also agree that she should "bow out". Maybe you can find someone else to take her place.

sassybee 07-28-2006 11:22 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutiepatutie
Not sure if this is where I post this, but... I have been trying to get a stamp club together for sometime and finally was able to get everyone in the same room. We are talking about the minimum, which is going back and forth between $40-$50/month. I don't think that is unreasonable to spend on stamps. We want the 400 buck hostess benni and that is what we have to spend to get that. Well, one of the ladies said to me "it's easy for you, you have a job." I'm so sick of hearing that. Yes, I do have a job, but you can get a job too! Don't use that lame *** excuse and don't put *your* money issues back on me because you choose not to work! And... if this was such a problem for her, why on earth did she show up for the meeting?? I just don't understand some people.... She did join, but I don't know why.

ok- so I'm done, flame me if you must. :???:

j

Ok, here come the flames----JUST KIDDING! I do think she was out of line with her comment and should not have called you out like that in front of everyone. She could've just said "We are only on one income right now and I am not sure I can afford to be in the group at this point in time". Better yet, she could've just told you this in private.
I am not quite sure why she has chosen not to work. Does she sit around all day eating bon bons or is she a stay at home mom? Yes, it is a choice. In my case, it is a choice because I choose not to put my child in daycare. I don't feel like it is a lame $%& excuse. It is a sacrifice I have decided to make in the best interest of my child. Although I am proud of my choice, I must admit that sometimes doing without gets very old. Sometimes I am excluded from things because we are on one income. If she has a good reason for staying home, then I think a little compassion and understanding on your part would be very considerate.

Consuelo 07-28-2006 11:28 AM

I do think she was wrong to compare herself to you. Every person's situation is different and it was completely uncalled for.

Having said that, I also think the $40-$50 is steep. I proabably do spend that much every month, but wouldn't want to be held to it by a contract. KWIM?

cutiepatutie 07-28-2006 11:42 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sassybee
Yes, it is a choice. In my case, it is a choice because I choose not to put my child in daycare. I don't feel like it is a lame $%& excuse. It is a sacrifice I have decided to make in the best interest of my child. Although I am proud of my choice, I must admit that sometimes doing without gets very old. Sometimes I am excluded from things because we are on one income. If she has a good reason for staying home, then I think a little compassion and understanding on your part would be very considerate.

I don't think I've been inconsiderate in the least. Everyone makes their own decision. If she doesn't want to a job, or can't get a job, or wants to stay home with the kids, that is her perogative. However... she probably should have said, "I just can't afford this." Not "well you have a job." Meaning that I am putting her in this position because I have a job and she doesn't.

I too have the feeling that she will be bowing out at some point. Probably after she gets her benefits. I was astounded that she joined in the first place. I'm glad that she joined, I do like stamping with her and she truly is a very nice person. That comment just pissed me off.

basketwilma 07-28-2006 11:54 AM

I am currently in a stamp club where the minimum purchase is $15, which on my budget is all I am willing to commit to at this point.

A $40 a month club, IMO is very steep for a few reasons. The order is never $40. There's what you choose to purchase and it never comes out even, it could come to $40, $43, $47 and that's without any taxes, shipping and handling. So for me a $40/month club ends up being at least a $50 in reality.

In the end NO ONE should judge any one when it comes to finances. NO ONE ever knows any one's financial situation. It doesn't matter if you stay at home, work a job, work two jobs... you never know what people can/cannot afford.

pammybaby 07-28-2006 12:16 PM

This is a very interesting thread! There are so many things involved - the job vs. no job; dollar amount of the stamp club; why did she say what she did in front of everyone, then go ahead and join anyway. Try not to let her make you feel bad - she does have a choice, and didn't HAVE to join. I'm thinking that she really WANTS to be a part of it, really WANTS to spend the $40 per month - but perhaps was having an argument with herself about spending the money when they are living on one income, and it came out at you. Good luck with whatever happens, and I hope you still remain friends!
(Take a deep breath . . . !)

Consuelo 07-28-2006 12:44 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutiepatutie
However... she probably should have said, "I just can't afford this." Not "well you have a job." Meaning that I am putting her in this position because I have a job and she doesn't.

I totally agree with you there.

Consuelo 07-28-2006 12:45 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sassybee
I am not quite sure why she has chosen not to work. Does she sit around all day eating bon bons or is she a stay at home mom? Yes, it is a choice. In my case, it is a choice because I choose not to put my child in daycare. I don't feel like it is a lame $%& excuse. It is a sacrifice I have decided to make in the best interest of my child. Although I am proud of my choice, I must admit that sometimes doing without gets very old. Sometimes I am excluded from things because we are on one income. If she has a good reason for staying home, then I think a little compassion and understanding on your part would be very considerate.

I don't think it really matters why she doesn't work.

sassybee 07-28-2006 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutiepatutie
I don't think I've been inconsiderate in the least. Everyone makes their own decision. If she doesn't want to a job, or can't get a job, or wants to stay home with the kids, that is her perogative. However... she probably should have said, "I just can't afford this." Not "well you have a job." Meaning that I am putting her in this position because I have a job and she doesn't.

I too have the feeling that she will be bowing out at some point. Probably after she gets her benefits. I was astounded that she joined in the first place. I'm glad that she joined, I do like stamping with her and she truly is a very nice person. That comment just pissed me off.

I didn't really mean that you were inconsiderate to her, per se. I just think you need to keep in mind that she may be struggling with not being able to participate. Also, I may have taken what you said about it "being her own choice, and lame #$% excuse" a little personally because I am a sahm. Personal feelings aside, I agree that it was wrong for her to front you out like that. It was actually pretty tactless on her part.

sassybee 07-28-2006 01:05 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Consuelo
I don't think it really matters why she doesn't work.

Point taken, Consuelo. I was getting all caught up with my emotions. You are correct, it doesn't matter why she's not working.

Consuelo 07-28-2006 01:10 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sassybee
I didn't really mean that you were inconsiderate to her, per se. I just think you need to keep in mind that she may be struggling with not being able to participate. Also, I may have taken what you said about it "being her own choice, and lame #$% excuse" a little personally because I am a sahm. Personal feelings aside, I agree that it was wrong for her to front you out like that. It was actually pretty tactless on her part.

Oh I see! I totally don't think she meant it that way. More of a defensive response, I think. I'm a SAHM, too. And I know for a fact that WE ROCK! ;)

{{{{Hugs Brenda}}}}

BethScrap 07-28-2006 01:55 PM

I wasn't there and didn't hear the tone in her voice when she said it to you, so please take that into consideration as you read my response.

I have sort of been in her shoes. I was a sahm mom by choice, along with that choice came the choice to live a less expensive life style. A similar situation arose with me and a girl friend at the time. She called me one day to see if I wanted to go to lunch. Sounded great, we always went to someplace like Don P'ablos (and I always had all kinds of coupons to make it cheaper for both of us). Well this one day on the way to the restaurant she decides that she would rather eat at this expensive steak place. So instead of it costing me around $10-15 (which I could barely afford) it was going to be more like $25. It was very difficult for me to tell her that I couldn't afford to eat there. It was difficult for her to understand that we didn't have the money for everything. I probably shouldn't have even done the cheaper restaurants, but I so enjoyed the opportunity to get out and spend the time with her. I am guessing that your friend has the same problem. Shouldn't spend the $40 a month (maybe even $20), but really likes stamping and really wants to be a part of the group. (There was a member in my first stamping club that we found out later never even took her orders out of the bags. She only came to stamping club for the friendship. She liked making the cards, but had no interest in stamping on her own.) Please consider whether her comment was one of spite or one of frustration. And being frustrated because you want her to spend $40 a month to play with you and think it should be no big deal, is different then her thinking that she should get a job, maybe she wants you to be more understanding of her choice not to work and to spend less.

I also have a couple of questions for you. You said that you talked a couple of months ago about having a $40 min so that the parties were $400. Well, did you talk about it or were comments made like "you know if we all commited to $40 then we could all get the benefits of a $400 party", but not really said "we are going to have a $40 min."

If you really think that she might flake out or have to quit the group, maybe you should consider helping her find a person to split her min order and her hostess benefits with. Another person where they could both spend $20 and when it was their turn to be hostess they would each get a hostess set and split the dollars. If possible may be a great solution.

Beth

craftygirl04 07-28-2006 02:34 PM

Could she not just come to this stamp club just to stamp? Like the above poster said... she may just want to be there for the friendship.

annabelle1974 07-28-2006 04:11 PM

I think that is very steep. I belong to 2 and spend $15 at each. In our group are teacher's aides who make $800 a month total, nurses aide's who make less than that. We have mothers who only work part time if at all to tend to their children. I wonder why you cannot set a reasonable minimum and if others want to bump it up they can for themselves. Those that do $15 a month get Level One when it is their turn. Those who order $40 a month can have the Level 3 when it is their turn.

SammyStamper 07-28-2006 04:19 PM

I think as long as you were up front with the costs per month, go for it. I think many would be happy to get $400 worth of benefits (I know I would) over $150. I have belonged to stamp clubs as well with the $15 and I always spent more. I agree that $40 a month would be hard for some people, but obviously not for the other 9 people that signed up. I also don't like when people make comments like that to me. I think it is great that friends of mine stay at home with their children and I really try to be considerate of their financial situation (ex. I cook dinner at my house instead of going out) but I don't want to hear how you have no money all the time. We all make choices and you need to live with the consequences but I won't feel quilty about what I spend either.

annabelle1974 07-28-2006 05:01 PM

What would be cool would be for demos to offer Level 1,2, and 3 clubs and you could join the one you could afford OR the one where you loved the hostess set. I actually love the Level 1's more than any others this year!

cutiepatutie 07-28-2006 06:14 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by BethScrap
I also have a couple of questions for you. You said that you talked a couple of months ago about having a $40 min so that the parties were $400. Well, did you talk about it or were comments made like "you know if we all commited to $40 then we could all get the benefits of a $400 party", but not really said "we are going to have a $40 min."

If you really think that she might flake out or have to quit the group, maybe you should consider helping her find a person to split her min order and her hostess benefits with. Another person where they could both spend $20 and when it was their turn to be hostess they would each get a hostess set and split the dollars. If possible may be a great solution. Beth

We all made the decision together about the $40. We talked about it and went back and forth about which benni we wanted, etc. She was hmming and haaing at that point. We decided as a group on the $40/month thing. This was not a surprise, to anyone. I'm not about to help her find someone else to split her min. order, she can locate that person herself - I don't have time for that (I have a job :p ). I agree with you though, that would be a great solution for her.

craftygirl04 - yes, she absolutely could come and only stamp and pay a workshop fee, rather than join the club.

cutiepatutie 07-28-2006 06:21 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by sassybee
I didn't really mean that you were inconsiderate to her, per se. I just think you need to keep in mind that she may be struggling with not being able to participate. Also, I may have taken what you said about it "being her own choice, and lame #$% excuse" a little personally because I am a sahm. Personal feelings aside, I agree that it was wrong for her to front you out like that. It was actually pretty tactless on her part.

The lame *** excuse has nothing to do with whether or not she is a SAHM. In fact, I work from home, with my two kids, 3x a week. I didn't like her using my job as an excuse for me to be able to spend $40. Like another poster said, she doesn't know my situation. Maybe I am up to my eyeballs in credit card debt (I'm not, but she doesn't know that).

I think SAHM have the toughest job there is. They are the most underappreciated workers in the US and it's pathetic.
We are responsible for raising future presidents, humanitarians, etc. and we get little to no respect (I'm on my soapbox, but I'm off now).

Korillian 07-29-2006 05:16 AM

I'd be a little worried that she's not going to stick to her commitment. That's she's stretching herself in order to join the club but it may not work out in the end, KWIM? But there's no way to know that for sure.

Clownmom 07-29-2006 05:35 AM

I agree with the people who said that $40 a month, every month, is pretty steep for many people. Why don't you make it $40 every other month. Granted, you wouldn't get your benefits as often -- but you would eventually get them. If, on the other hand, everyone agrees -- with that one exception -- that $40 a month is how you want to go, she needs to bow out. . . which is probably what she's going to do in the long run.

stampintoothfairy 07-29-2006 06:11 AM

This comment was totally out of line. She should not have made that comment in front of the group. I have a long time friend who refuses to work very much. She is single, no kids, no husband, 1 dog, no health issues preventing her from working. No reason not to work. She is always putting her money issues on me. I quit a good job to go back to school, went into student loan debt, lived on next to nothing for 2 years, worked my @ss off, and am now enjoying my success.

I, in no way, rub it into her face, but when we go shopping, always her idea BTW, she makes comments like "Like you need to look at the sale rack" and if I pick a few things to buy "why don't you just buy the whole store?" She also gripes to her family, whom I was close with, that I "am on a name brand store kick". Hello, I got a few nice summer dresses at a high end store ON CLEARANCE. I was excited that I got a $100.00 dress for $19.99.

I had to finally tell her that I am tired of apologizing for success that I worked very hard for and if anyone doesn't like it, they can do exactly what I did, make the sacrifice and go back to school (which she also has 10 reasons why she can't).

Oh, another bit of history, she has had a boob job, LASIK for her eyes, and laser hair removal that she is still paying on. Her choices on how to spend the little money she does earn, but don't put your wowes on me.

HER CHOICES SHOULD NOT MAKE YOU FEEL BAD. Ignore her comment, maybe she just got done paying bills and realized that she couldn't afford it comfortably. Also, make her the hostess last so she won't bail after she gets her bennefits. CYA (cover your assetts). ;O)

stampintoothfairy 07-29-2006 06:15 AM

Oh, and when I was still a customer, I was in a club where the minimum was $10.00 and I ALWAYS spent over $30.00. I got 3 pads and 3 matching packs of CS a month. Easy way to get all the pads and CS, (she doesn't have to buy stamps) so I don't think $40.00 is unreasonable if it was discussed and the group agreed. Heck, for my $30.00 I only got 1 level 1 set and bennies, I should have taken 3 spots in the club, but it was my choice to spend more. Chin up!!

frankie 07-29-2006 06:31 AM

Well I think her comment was out of line -- just as you might not know her circumstances, she doesn't know yours either. It's always wrong to assume and that's just what she did imo!

I don't think $40 a month is steep at all for a stamp club to get a $400 workshop and those benefits. When I used to have a hostess club that was usually the average a month anyway. I hope your club works out an you have fun!

NancyK. 07-29-2006 07:31 AM

I'm with those who feel she just should have not joined the club. Everyone has their own budget to deal with and must make choices accordingly. In my stamp club we agree to $25 per month, just to get the minimum hostess benefits and we all agree to that. Along with this, I had signed up for an online stamp kit club (min 3 mnth membership) and while I absolutely loved the kits, it was costing me over $60 per month and I had to cancel. Perhaps you can get together once a month just for fun and stamping with your club so that this person can enjoy the social tilme?

mcschmidty 07-29-2006 07:41 AM

you have a job....
 
First off, I am not a demo, I do have a good paying part time job....

I think if you are a demo, you are a business- you are the face for Stampin Up to all of these ladies. You have an awesome place here on Splitcoast to vent, but to her face, it is all about Customer Service BABY!!! You cannot react to comments like that, or comments made by a customer screaming in your face! You are the face of Stampin Up.......

In my humble opinion- and I am not making an argument for or against, remember that most non-demo's do not work for SU and we have other things to do everyday that Stamping- this caould be easily misunderstood.... Stampin is not how we make $$$, so it is not as high on our priority list is a better way to phrase that. I would love to stamp everyday, but I cannot! I have a hard time using all of the stuff I buy being in a $25.00 per month club!

In the end, if you work her just right, she could be your best customer ever...maybe by your excellent example, she will even sign on to be a demo someday!!!

Good luck with your club!

Shelly

mcschmidty 07-29-2006 07:46 AM

job
 
One more thought- I love the challenges that are posted here on SCS. Maybe you could have a challenge for your club to present one card per month, and people win something if they participate??? It does not have to be a huge prise, but everyone LOVES to get something free or at a reduced price!!! I am going to assume you do a technique or something when the club meets?? That would encourage the ladies to use what they buy....

One of my friends buys with me once every 3 months or so, and I offer to mount her stamps for her....otherwise she will never use them. That is a stretch, but may be wise for your business to keep these ladies with the rubber to the ink!!!

Shelly

GWTW Junkie 07-29-2006 07:48 AM

I have a friend who works full time and commutes two hours every day, and she thinks my SAHM life is all bon-bons and soap operas and is envious.

I work my backside off with kids underfoot all day every day and I look at her Starbucks & designer clothes lifestyle, free time and spotless house and am envious.

The thing is, we women think that the grass is greener on the other side of the fence, and it isn't. Her comment just reflects that attitude. It was a little tacky, but I hear similar jealousy all the time from people sighing, "well, YOU have time to stamp." You just have to shrug it off. She doesn't understand that having a job doesn't solve all your financial problems. Just like becoming a SAHm doesn't solve all your family/housework/time issues.

In my case, my friend is seven months pregnant and is quitting her job to become a SAHM. I have been giggling to myself ever since I heard the news! Maybe it's mean spirited a little, but I can't WAIT for her to see what being a SAHM is all about!!! : ) hee hee She is in for a BIG shock.
(and yes, don't worry, I will be there with lots of chocolate and a big shoulder to cry on when she figures out what life is going to be like with a new baby)

GWTW Junkie 07-29-2006 07:50 AM

Forgot to add I personally could NEVER commit to $40 a month... way too pricey for me. But I wouldn't allow myself to sign a contract because I just know I couldn't do it. This gal needs to be realistic and not be in denial about her finances.

Shelley Davis 07-29-2006 08:01 AM

Do you realize that .....that is a huge amount of money! That is $5,100 a year? Sorry I think that is way to much of a committment! I don't care who you are. We have a $25 committment, and most of us spend more than that. Even if you have a job I couldn't find $50 a month times 12 worth of things I have to have in the catalog. I think that just because you can afford this doesn't mean that every one can. Why don't you open the group so that the hostess can invite up to 4 friends to her show. Then those who want a big hostess benefit can achieve that if that is the whole purpose of your group. I am with Sassybee on her thoughts. If it is a club.....every member and their needs should be considered!
You have been torched!
Shelley

lilorangemouse 07-29-2006 08:45 AM

I run my clubs with a $40 min. purchase - but I have 6 members in each club and we meet every other month (this is Canadian funds too). I like these numbers. It guarantees the hostess at qualifying party. But, most members spend more than $40 - maybe an average of $60. Plus, with only 6 members, there's room for each hostess to invite others to her party. I've never had a hostess club party add up to less than $500 - most are around $750. The hostess club members do not feel stretched, but they all get a lot of benefits.

Kerrie7301 07-29-2006 09:07 AM

Hmm - ok. I just really feel the need to say something here. While I think that she shouldn't assume that it's easy for you to meet a minimum of $50 a month because you have a job, I think it's totally unfair that you all but accuse her of beaing lazy for working.

You said Yes, I do have a job, but you can get a job too! Don't use that lame *** excuse and don't put *your* money issues back on me because you choose not to work!

You're assuming that she chooses not to work - do you know her family situation? She may not have a choice. Maybe she has no one to watch her children if she just goes out and gets a job. Maybe she couldn't afford the childcare even if she HAD a job. Perhaps her spouse works shifts, making it more difficult for her to find a part time job because she cant count on him to work a set schedule and therefore can't commit to an employer that she will be available for set shifts. It's not always as simple as choosing not to work.

As I'm sure you can tell by my ire, I am a SAHM, partly by choice and partly by necessity. Yeah it sucks not being able to spend as much as I want whenever I want, but honestly even if I WAS working I STILL couldn't commit to $50 a month as my family's needs come before my stamping habit.

paperquilter 07-29-2006 09:50 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Shelley Davis
Do you realize that .....that is a huge amount of money! That is $5,100 a year?

Hmmm, check your math here... 12 months x $40 =$480 plus shipping/tax. Still a considerable expenditure, but no way it's over five thousand dollars per person! Maybe you meant the total club order for all ten members?
--Liz

Doodah 07-29-2006 10:11 AM

OMG
 
Had fun reading all the posts to this thread!!! I agree with most and disagree with only a few.. I was a SAHM for 8 years and loved it. I left a HIGH paying job to stay home and had to gve upa few things but it was well worth it. My kids are my life. My husband made great $$$ and so it wasn't soo bad but I think $40 a month might be kind of steep for some, you just don't know what unexpected expenses might come up that month. I always spent the minimum until it was my Hostess Monthn then I placed a big order to bump me to a Level 3 and got outside orders too. Are minimums were $25 dollars which most people spent more anyways.
How many people in the club??? Maybe you could do it every other month if there's 6 of you??? JMO
I feel the comment was unnessecary and or should of been done in private. I agrre w/ stampintoothfairy: Make her the LAST hostess so if she bails out it won't be after she gets her beenies. LOL..
Also, don't take it personnally maybe she doesn't realize she struck a nerve with you. I would also talk to her about this issue so it doesn't happen again.JMHO.
Good luck in what ever happens!!!

Kittypaws 07-29-2006 10:39 AM

We had a situation like that in our club last year, only the person happened to be first on the hostess list & bailed out right after.

Our commitment is $15 per month, which most people could probably handle without any problems. However, we all spend considerably more, but it is nice to know that we can fall back on the $15 minimum if there are bad times. I think $40 is too much to be commited to each month.

As for the comments made, she should never have said what she said, and I can understand your frustration. However, perhaps she had a very bad day and just spouted off. I do agree with the others, though, to place her as the hostess the last month.

Good luck with your club.

trefoil 07-29-2006 10:48 AM

No flames from me! Sorry she was so rude. :(

Everyone makes the choices for their lives that lead to the drawbacks and benifits that they are currently have. Shame on her for complaining that, in her mind, your lifestyle has a benefit that hers does not. We all have the lives we want given our individual priorities. If she wanted that particular benefit in her life, she could have it, but she'd have it at a price she doesn't want to pay. That's not good or bad, it's her choice given what she wants out of life. Given that, the only reasonable response to the hostess club would have been, "I don't think this will fit within my budget, so I'll have to pass. Let me know if you start a club aimed at the $150 hostess benefits (or ... if you want to just hang out and stamp)."

There are things I can't afford to do and things I don't have time to do, because of my choices. I would imagine complaining that someone else either has more money or more time. I could have more of either if I chose. I'm just not willing to sacrifice what I would need to sacrifice to get more. That makes it very easy to be happy for friends who have more than I do (of whatever). They have what they most want, just as I have what I most want. What is there to complain about?

Anyway, whatever her problem is, don't make it yours. Her remarks only reflect on her, not on you.

kelwil 07-29-2006 11:12 AM

I have 3 groups going, most of the women spend more than $40 a month, the min. order is $25-30 depending on the group.
It's nice that this person acknowledges the fact that what you do is a JOB! Most people, my relatives usually, don't see what I do as a 'real' job. They think I sit on my butt all day stamping. But in June, with my GR cheque, promotion bonus, Instant Income and Volume Rebate, I made more money doing SU than I did when I worked at a 'real' job. I don't have to pay for daycare, and with my 3 groups meeting at my house, I don't have to drive all over town.
One of my groups doesn't understand commitment. The group is falling apart and I'm not sure why. They are from the same school and know each other. One dropped after 2 months, another tried but she had just gotten all her free stuff and another woman told her she couldn't, and I told her that too. I make them sign a contract outlining what I expect of them and what the can expect from me. 4 months in to it the hostess for that month decides she doesn't need anything so didn't put an order in and I told her she doesn't get the free stuff either. So I think it's safe to say she's gone too. Some people just don't get it.

Why not recruit this woman so she can earn money to buy her stamps?

Kelli

senovia 07-29-2006 11:26 AM

I have a job as well, but 75% of my money goes to day care. It's not an "if you have a job" issue. I personally think $40 is WAY too high and I would never join it if I have to pay that much per month. Find richer guests!

aniam215 07-29-2006 11:53 AM

I am a little confused. Are you a demo or not? I am assuming you are not since you are not posting this in the demo forum. If you are the demo, maybe this lady resents the fact that your making a commission based on her high minimum purchase. Just a thought ...

The minimum $ is really not the issue here since everyone knew ahead of time. It's not a government funded club, it does not have to be accessible to everyone. I would love to belong to a health club but I can not afford the membership so I do not join, I don't demand that they lower the dues.

The real issue is the lack of respect for people's life choices and living with the results of our own. She should not have said that to you, especially in front of others. Maybe, as others have said, it was out of frustration. Maybe it was also frustration that made you lash out about her not having a job. I am unclear on the relationship you have with this woman. If she is a friend then maybe you should talk to her about her comment.

Another idea on the minimum if you did want everyone to be included. Set the minimum to a lower amount and those that can afford the $40+ can save the extra $$ for when it is their month to boost their hostess total. Ex: min. $20/mo; save $20 month; add the $200 saved to the $200 min. order total = $400 order. Just another thought ...

Jocelyn1224 07-29-2006 12:34 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by cutiepatutie
I think SAHM have the toughest job there is. They are the most underappreciated workers in the US and it's pathetic.
We are responsible for raising future presidents, humanitarians, etc. and we get little to no respect (I'm on my soapbox, but I'm off now).

AMEN! We've been a one-income household for a few months now, and there are people in our lives who seem obsessed with mentioning in every conversation, how much they pay for this, that, or the other. Really, I'm glad you're doing all this big stuff and going on vacations, and I love and fully accept that we've signed up to live a more modest lifestyle (BELIEVE me, I'd rather have time with my baby than stamps or other unnecessary stuff), but enough is enough. It gets to a point of flaunting and showing off and it disgusts me. I'm alienated from conversations, because all I can add is, "I just spent $35 on diapers...but have fun in Maui." I keep quiet, but it's hard not to get up and leave after the thirtieth, "we just got ___ and we paid ___" :rolleyes: Get over it...if you want me to know how much money you have, bust out your bankbook and let's move on!

Sorry...rant over :)


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