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-   -   unappreciative receivers (https://www.splitcoaststampers.com/forums/general-stamping-talk-17/unappreciative-receivers-355677/)

DapperD 06-26-2008 08:14 AM

I recently made a couple of cards for an aunt who is recouperating from a broken hip and hip replacement surgery. She didn't say anything about the cards I made her, nor did she say she received them, but that isn't why I made them or sent them to her. I wanted to let her know I thought about her. I don't think my aunt has any idea I made cards and that's okay with me. Maybe the receiver of the card didn't know you made it. Some people know to ask if I made it and other people assume I went to Hallmark. Either way, I agree with others, (1) don't expect anything in return, (2) support your habit!:)

Donna

ksimmons 10-08-2008 01:23 PM

Unappreciated cards
 
I'm kinda late in getting into this discussion but I just happened across this today. It made me laugh to read all of the comments about the people who do or don't appreciate handmade cards. I have an unusual situation in that regard. My 80 year old father thinks my cards are the best things he's ever seen and he keeps them all. The first time I sent him one of my stamped cards he pulled out a "card" I made for him when I was about 7 years old! He kept that card for 38 years! (Let's just say that it wasn't one of my best efforts! LOL) On the other hand, my SIL never mentions the cards I send her nor does my best friend. My mother usually says something about them but isn't as taken with them as my dad. I think it is funny that I have a number of women in my life who don't care at all about the cards I make for them but my 80 year old dad does! I guess 'once daddy's little girl, always daddy's little girl.'

I'll still keep making cards and sending them to the people who are less than enthusiastic because I love the process of making them so I'm not going to worry about whether I get lots of oohs and aahs.

bdeyes9 10-08-2008 01:58 PM

Sometimes appreciation comes from unexpected sorces...One Easter I made
cards for our family. On the back I stamped a bunny's behind and signed my name. My BIL got the biggest kick out of it. Then for his birthday I made him a card. I always stamp someting on the back to go along with the "theme"
His called me up to ask where the bunny butt was. I told the bunny was for Easter. He told me the bunny but should be my trade mark...Well you guessed it..Everycard I make for them has the bunny butt!!! In fact for his milestone BD I made him a 21 BUN salute card!!!

tootsie roll 10-08-2008 01:59 PM

I always say "look at the front" "I made this card just for you!"

Minders 10-08-2008 04:53 PM

Some people are just not observant or just don't really care about cards and stuff in the first place. Even my mom isn't that impressed but it's not her thing. She's not creative at all and just doesn't "get" it really. Most people like them. Just like some people don't like shopping, or fishing, or any other hobby. I feel the way a lot of people on here, that I just have fun making them.

anniesmom 10-09-2008 03:54 AM

I had someone tell me that they thought handmade cards were a way of "cheaping out" instead of buying a manufactured card. I was ready to wind up and give her a left hook. She had absolutely no clue how much a handmade card costs.

3 Little Love Bugs 10-09-2008 05:46 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by anniesmom (Post 11619804)
I had someone tell me that they thought handmade cards were a way of "cheaping out" instead of buying a manufactured card. I was ready to wind up and give her a left hook. She had absolutely no clue how much a handmade card costs.

That's hilarious!!! I agree, if they only knew how MUCH stuff I had and how much it all costs...of course, then they'd want to have my head examined for the money I "wasted"! :rolleyes: There's no pleasing some people, which is why I continue to please myself. :mrgreen:

ceramics 10-09-2008 06:44 AM

That kind of a reply only means they have never made anything with their hands before. They have no idea the time and thought that goes into a homemade gift or card.

I feel bad for them that they don't appreciate love when they see (receive) it.

SarahB2 10-13-2008 04:16 PM

I think it's a guy thing my FIL is like this but my DH and my dad realize how much time goes into it. Now my extended family doesn't understand either. This year only a few select ones will be getting handmade (I recieved a lot in a swap I hosted) the others will get regular ones. Now my MIL, my DHs grandma saves all the cards I make. Which makes me feel good, I also do the same any card, Christmas, bday, etc that are handmade go into a special box and I like to pull them out to look at for a pick me up or even ideas :)

tommygirloz 10-13-2008 04:37 PM

I believe every human being has the need for appreciation. BUT! IMHO, if you are giving away anything (be it a card, time or anything) the best is just not to expect anything in return. Because if you didn't get what you expect, you'll feel disappointed and you'll feel bad towards the person. You give because you feel like giving and giving makes you feel happy. Remember that giving is better than receiving. ;)

Just a thought...

stamp? 10-13-2008 04:39 PM

I know what you mean. My FIL tried to pull apart a card that I made for him - he thought there was money inside it!! :rolleyes:

(not sure what he was thinking as he had already opened the gift ...)

Sue Strozyk 10-13-2008 04:44 PM

I really love to make cards, but what really kills me is knowing all the money i spend on supplies, and i'm sure alot of people just throw them in the garbage!!

peebsmama 10-13-2008 05:12 PM

I had been sending my nephew a card once a month just to let him know I was thinking of him (we live far apart). One time when he got one, he said "What am I supposed to do with this?". That was the last time he got a card from me. I realize he was only 6 or so at the time and hadn't yet learned manners. But still, it made me realize that it was a waste to send him anything. So instead, I make the same kid themed card each month and send it to a kid's charity instead. I realize there may be a lot of people I send cards to who don't appreciate it, but most have told me how much they really enjoy them. And I really do get a lot of pleasure out of making them.

klhbenson 10-13-2008 08:28 PM

hum.....you just never know how the things you do/give affect other people. Even though you thought they didn't look at the front....they might have later. But bottom line...you enjoy the making, the art, the expression, the sharing, and the giving. You should continue, and do so with a loving and willing heart.

I too thought my cards weren't appreciated...but I kept giving anyways. (because I like making them, and I was getting a pretty big stack...lol)...and I have been blessed by months and years after I gave someone a card - which to me was a pretty insignificant thing...but many moons later, I was told how much it meant to them....

to be honest, I would never have thought they even liked the cards...let alone had the impact they did. I had never received recognition for the cards....was never thanked...didn't really even know if the people had received them.

But the cards have touched people and moved people. Share your gift to create, and let God take care of the receiver.

Taking time to say "you care", however you convey it - matters. Even if people don't want to show that it matters....it MATTERS.

kathy

SarahB2 10-14-2008 02:25 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by peebsmama (Post 11675673)
I had been sending my nephew a card once a month just to let him know I was thinking of him (we live far apart). One time when he got one, he said "What am I supposed to do with this?". That was the last time he got a card from me. I realize he was only 6 or so at the time and hadn't yet learned manners. But still, it made me realize that it was a waste to send him anything. So instead, I make the same kid themed card each month and send it to a kid's charity instead. I realize there may be a lot of people I send cards to who don't appreciate it, but most have told me how much they really enjoy them. And I really do get a lot of pleasure out of making them.

I am sorry to hear about your nephew doing this. Even a 6 year old can be taught manners. I have three children all ages 6 and under and my oldest two know that they don't say anything like that if they did they would be made to apologize to the sender. I like the idea though of instead of sending to him you send it to a charity, the child who recieves will appreciate your kindness.

LateBlossom 10-14-2008 03:12 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by klhbenson (Post 11677752)
hum.....you just never know how the things you do/give affect other people. Even though you thought they didn't look at the front....they might have later. But bottom line...you enjoy the making, the art, the expression, the sharing, and the giving. You should continue, and do so with a loving and willing heart.

I too thought my cards weren't appreciated...but I kept giving anyways. (because I like making them, and I was getting a pretty big stack...lol)...and I have been blessed by months and years after I gave someone a card - which to me was a pretty insignificant thing...but many moons later, I was told how much it meant to them....

to be honest, I would never have thought they even liked the cards...let alone had the impact they did. I had never received recognition for the cards....was never thanked...didn't really even know if the people had received them.

But the cards have touched people and moved people. Share your gift to create, and let God take care of the receiver.

Taking time to say "you care", however you convey it - matters. Even if people don't want to show that it matters....it MATTERS.

kathy

I totally agree.

whim6915 10-14-2008 03:21 AM

My mom is in a nursing home and I send cards full of family news since we are 400 miles away. She never said anything about the cards but during one visit she told me that one of the other residents was talking about how pretty the card was and who was the 'Christine' stamped on the back. Mom said she didn't know! Bless her heart, she didn't even realize that I was making them until then. Course, then she said that she never would have thought I could make something like that! LOL!

Phantom 10-14-2008 06:23 AM

I have two stamps to put on the back but I always forget to use them! One is with the crown and says "when you care enough.... to make it yourself." and the other says "No it's not Hallmark... but thanks for looking!"

I have had experiences on both ends of the spectrum... My sister who wants to frame a set of cards together -- one I made her, her son and her husband. Then I have sent cards to one person every year for her birthday and she has never commented once ~ someone I just expected would appreciate the effort. I've also made cards for someone who was surprised to find I had made them - and said, "You made those notecards?!"

Some people save them all, some display them, and some never mention them. I especially love making cards for my daughter's friends' birthdays... the kids rip open the envelope ('cuz moms always insist that they read the card first, right?!)... usually the girls stop and admire the front ~ and the moms go nuts!! They love 'em!

The latest story is a bit about my husband. When I show him cards I've made, he usually glances at it briefly and says "Yes, very nice dear..." and doesn't really want to be bothered. (Sometimes I get, "That's beautiful!") Well, a neighbor I don't know very well is getting married and the wedding is two hours away ~ I have never met his bride-to-be. The invite said "no children" for the reception. We have a 7-year-old daughter who LOVES to dance at wedding receptions and I had no intention of going without her. Turns out DH has to work anyway so we won't be going. Anyway, going through some boxes, I found a very nice Hallmark wedding card and I showed it to him and said that's the one I'd send. He just laughed. He realized I didn't care enough to make one by hand. Well... I did cave in, borrowed a couple of wedding sets, and made one. I'm glad I did - I like how it turned out LOL!! I don't care if they don't appreciate it or not. It's one more successful card and I enjoyed it ;).


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