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-   -   Does it bother you if people don't seem to appreciate your homemade cards. (https://www.splitcoaststampers.com/forums/general-stamping-talk-17/does-bother-you-if-people-dont-seem-appreciate-your-homemade-cards-606250/)

Rnruns60 12-24-2015 07:44 PM

Does it bother you if people don't seem to appreciate your homemade cards.
 
I'm kind of new to card making and am so enjoying the process, both the supply collecting and the actual making of the cards. For the first time in many years I sent out some Christmas cards. I spent so much time on them and really worked to make them special and individual for each person. I feel childish saying this but I guess I was hoping for some acknowledgement of them. I only sent the cards to close family who I thought would appreciate the effort.
It's not that big a deal and I won't dwell on it but I was a tad disappointed. Has anyone else felt this way and how do you deal with it?

jennik 12-24-2015 07:50 PM

Only special people get handmade cards. :). Not everyone is appreciative. So there you go.

Jennik

fionna51 12-24-2015 08:50 PM

I started making cards more than 30 years ago. As for Christmas cards, I've learned to have no expectations from the people I send them to. Some are appreciative and comment to me. Some I think are too busy and it slips their mind. Others probably don't care, or don't like what I make, and I don't really want to hear that anyway.

I get more comments from recipients on cards sent for other occasions...birthday or get-well or baby or wedding...than I do for Christmas cards. And I always get comments from my friends who also stamp. Funny thing! Just tonight we were discussing the details as to how we made our Christmas cards!!

And you'll always get affirmation on cards here on SCS. :)

Allistamps123 12-25-2015 01:14 AM

No, I really don't mind zero feedback but I understand why you are feeling this way.
I don't individualize Christmas cards for each person. That could make it harder that no comments have been made.

Many people don't understand what goes into making a card. Also, Christmas is a busy time. Things may have been too hectic to think about making a comment.

I've actually asked close family members, "Hey, did you like that card I sent?"

Do all your recipients realize they are handmade? It would seem obvious to us but I remember one of the first hm cards I was given I didn't realize it was hand stamped!

Also, I've gotten feedback from various people long after the fact. I may be posting a picture of a pile of supplies during a holiday card making session such as Valentine's day on facebook and someone comments on how wonderful the cards they have received in the past are.

My one daughter never comments, is not a saver yet saves my cards so I know they are meaningful to her!

So there may be some comments or affirmations coming your way still!

melissa59 12-25-2015 07:51 AM

Nope! It doesn't bother me at all if they don't comment. In fact, I don't even expect an acknowledgement of receipt at Christmas. This is the time of year that many of us gets lots of cards from family, friends, acquaintances, Stampin' Up rep, car insurance guy, etc.

wavejumper 12-25-2015 08:08 AM

I get it. ((hugs)) and steady on there.

(My) rule one: You make and send b/c you want to and expect nothing back.

This saves a lot of heartache. Even if someone said they like it, the idea of it going into the trash could make me nuts years ago.

Do you stamp or write on the back of the card so they know you made it?

I have been known to write in a card "hope you like this-I made it!"

I agree-you may well hear about it over time. I dont expect anyone to pick up a phone and call me-so it may be whenever I do talk to them again....and then sometimes not even after a mailing..I could be sitting with some family and they will bring it up.

So hang in there! :)

Dorie95 12-25-2015 09:35 AM

Some people comment, some don't.

It's usually the ones that don't acknowledge other things like gifts, phone calls, favors, that don't comment or even mention they got the card. And I raised all of them the same (if you get my drift!). Whatever...

That's okay. I make the cards and have fun doing them, once they're mailed I forget about them and then I start making another bunch. :p

muscrat 12-25-2015 09:44 AM

I only hear from them if they DON'T get one!

canada goose 12-25-2015 10:57 AM

I only send handmade cards to other card makers,and people that I know appreciate the work that went into making them. Busy time of year so I don't sweat it if I don't get acknowledgement , as I have already received the same from them.

mycatbillybob 12-25-2015 12:16 PM

Last night my niece told me she has saved every Christmas card and box I have ever given her family! Wow what news! I'm glad they love them but the secret reason I make them is that I get such joy making them all. I never make two the same.

deeth1 12-25-2015 01:24 PM

My neighbor just told me she loved the Thank You card I gave her LAST YEAR. So it may take a while to find out they really did enjoy them....

Arlene_C 12-25-2015 01:26 PM

I don't usually get any feedback from family except my oldest DD. One year I did not send out Thanksgiving cards and she told me she did not get one - I had only made 2 cards and didn't bother to mail since not all my family would get one. She informed me that she kept all the cards I sent her in an album so, I mailed her one late! She has dabbled in card making in the past, so she KNOWS!
I know most probably throw the cards away - that no longer bothers me. I love making cards. It's therapy.
However, I also love to receive cards - homemade or store bought. I only received 3 Christmas cards this year (I think it is the same as last year) - 1) my SU demo; 2) my nephew -with a photo of his family and sweet kids; 3) my BFF who lives in Calif. and LOVES my homemade cards.

muscrat 12-25-2015 01:53 PM

I sent over 100 and received 60 so that's a pretty good ratio. Nearly 40 of mine go into mailboxes at church so I imagine about 20 of mine came from my church mailbox.

STAMPTAYLOR 12-25-2015 02:11 PM

I only sent out 15 this year, but did get a message from two people how much they loved the cards. It's nice to hear from them, but most people don't realize what goes into making cards.

melissa59 12-25-2015 02:37 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by muscrat (Post 21142614)
I sent over 100 and received 60 so that's a pretty good ratio. Nearly 40 of mine go into mailboxes at church so I imagine about 20 of mine came from my church mailbox.

Wow, that is a lot of cards to send and receive!

I mailed only 11 cards and received 8. Six of those cards are from people on this site. One was from a former coworker with a photo of his new baby. The other was from my State Farm insurance guy, who sends me a card every Christmas and for my birthday.

buggainok 12-25-2015 03:46 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by melissa59 (Post 21142631)
Wow, that is a lot of cards to send and receive!

I mailed only 11 cards and received 8. Six of those cards are from people on this site. One was from a former coworker with a photo of his new baby. The other was from my State Farm insurance guy, who sends me a card every Christmas and for my birthday.

Ha! Gotta love those insurance company Christmas and birthday cards. I also occasionally get one from the dentist. Yikes!

Janet1000 12-25-2015 03:47 PM

I was surprised that an old, old friend/former employee actually asked me to teach her how to make cards because she just loved my Christmas card I made her. She went on and on about how pretty she thought it was. That's the first time she has ever made a comment about my cards. You just never know who will notice and make a point to tell you.

Otherwise, I send my cards to people I know appreciate it. And if I don't hear from them, it's OK. I made the cards because that is the joy for me. Not the recognition. Definitely not the recognition.

I am surprised at how few cards I get outside my own family. It seems the only people who mail out holiday cards any more are businesses. And us.

uncbballfan 12-25-2015 04:28 PM

Make and send send cards because YOU love doing it and you love the people you're sending them to. If you can do that, then any feedback is just gravy. Nobody but other cardmakers know that your heart and soul went into those cards...

poppydarling 12-25-2015 07:13 PM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Rnruns60 (Post 21142459)
I feel childish saying this but I guess I was hoping for some acknowledgement of them. I only sent the cards to close family who I thought would appreciate the effort.
It's not that big a deal and I won't dwell on it but I was a tad disappointed. Has anyone else felt this way and how do you deal with it?

Not at all! I think it really depends on the types of cards in terms of expectations � at least it is for me. If I make a tiny but elaborate collage or a heavily embellished card with lots of layers and steps and die cutting, it's like a little art piece. Those are the ones where it chaps me if I don't get any response at all! I've learned to only give those to people who receive them with a kind, grateful spirit. I'm expressing something by giving them that art, it's only natural to desire a response.

I told a couple of friends how gracious they were in response to the junk journals and cards that I made for them, and how good that makes me feel. Now they're even more effusive when I give them a handmade item :lol: It's a beautiful loop, because I'm more inclined to make things for them, and enjoy every minute, and they seem to love getting them.

Strangely enough, this is the 7th? 8th? year I've sent out handmade Christmas cards and I've had a few comments on them already. That's a couple more than usual. My low expectations have already been exceeded ;)

If I make a quick CAS card and jot a note inside, like I did for my neighbors' Christmas cards this year, it doesn't bother me much if I don't get a response. I just wanted them to know I was thinking of them. I'm learning to go extremely simple if I feel I want to make handmade cards for people who don't usually respond at all. I save most of my crafting energy for those gracious friends!

JoBear2 12-25-2015 08:30 PM

1 Attachment(s)
I have dabbled in alot of crafts over the years & would make special Christmas gifts for family & friends. One year, I painted 6 x teddy bear ornaments - which took me a couple of months (if you look at the attachment, you can see how much effort I put into just one of them - and I painted 6 different designs!). One ornament was for my brother (my only sibling) & his wife - & the remainder for my husband's 5 siblings. Only my brother said thank you. I was really disappointed & disheartened :(

Fast-forward a few years & I started cardmaking & even though everyone in my family & extended family knows I make cards, I rarely get a thank you or even an acknowledgement - other than my brother & his family who mostly say thank you but not always. But it no longer bothers me because I know in my heart that I made whatever it might be - for that person - and I always say that I put a small piece of my heart in every crafty item that I do. And I am sure that everyone has good intentions & want to say thank you, but they forget in the busy-ness of Christmas or their kids' lives.

People also don't realise the amount of work that goes into even a simple card because people are so used to just buying a card, signing it & posting it off - which takes 5 minutes. Once a crafty item leaves my home, I don't really care what happens to it because I had the joy of making it & I just ♥LOVE♥ to create things - it's my happy place that I can go to whenever I need to chill out. I think if I waited for someone to say "thank you", you would have to cue the crickets for a v-e-rrr-y l-o-n-g time!

When I went to Christmas lunch at my brother's home yesterday, hanging up next to where the Christmas table was set, was my teddy bear ornament. Even though I did it years ago, the fact that they still have it & they have certainly looked after it because it was in pristine condition, made my heart swell. I would just enjoy your cardmaking & not worry about any thank yous or acknowledgements as many of us here are in the same boat. At least us cardmakers understand how much time & effort goes into our creations!

jukie 12-26-2015 12:15 AM

Does it bother me? Short answer No.

I make cards because I enjoy making them & I know there is a percentage that don't appreciate the work, thought & time that goes into them but that's OK my reward came from making the card in the first place.

When my mother passed away a few years back I found all the cards I had ever sent her, it broke my heart just a little bit more but it also made it sing ...they had brightened up her day enough that she kept them.

People may not say anything but if you do not send any cards or even dream of sending a bought card ...then you will know how appreciated your cards are lol!

mheartm 12-26-2015 01:25 AM

JoBear2 - Re: Teddy Bear ornament...WOW! AWESOME!UNBELIEVABLE!

cobby 12-26-2015 07:40 AM

I've been sending handmade cards for about 12 years. I never got any feedback, positive or negative. Then after a few years, my husband's family would ask me, "did you make this"? When I responded yes, I'd get, "oh...huh". MAYBE I'd get a "nice".
Within the last three years I've had lifelong friends start to give much love and appreciation over birthday or "just because" cards I send. And I've had some family (my side) really gush over my Christmas cards; to the point of posting pics and praise on Facebook.
This year one friend she will turn my card into an ornament for her tree next year.

This is maybe 5 different people, family and friends, who have offered up some love and praise after 12 years of receiving my cards.

I share all of this to echo what others have said, you never know when someone might offer some appreciation.
AND...I agree with wavejumper....Rule #1....I make cards because I like to, I do not expect positive comments in return. I really try to live by that rule. Otherwise, all the fun of making cards could be sucked right out of me.
It's nice, after so many years to get some love back, but I can't let that dictate if I make cards or not. I do it for myself, it's my hobby of choice!

Janet1000 12-26-2015 08:13 AM

OK. After all the zen like posts I see here...

I admit I will get a little irked if a friend/family/co-worker who has historically received hand made cards and not said a thing does something that I would consider 'toadish', I do immediately demote them onto my dollar store card list. :-)

And I do get some really ugly dollar store cards (on purpose). I have had a couple people then come up to me and asked if they had offended me in some way - because it dawns on them (sometimes subconsciously) they have received some pretty spectacular, nice, or cute cards historically and today they were the recipient of a card that is uglier/nastier than a dog's derri�re and subconsciously something clicks... just saying.;-)

And when I get a really ugly card I think to myself "I really need to shower that person with love." Either their life is so stressed that they had to put a stamp on something so ugly, or their mind is so scrambled that they think it's pretty...

Yea, a really ugly dollar store card tells everyone involved that something needs to be addressed here.

Janeyrocket 12-26-2015 08:17 AM

It used to bother me but now I realize that I like making cards because of the process and not the feedback. That being said, it is super fun when a friend who has never mentioned it before said that she can never throw away my cards. :)

poppydarling 12-26-2015 08:31 AM

Quote:

Originally Posted by Janet1000 (Post 21142819)
OK. After all the zen like posts I see here...

I admit I will get a little irked if a friend/family/co-worker who has historically received hand made cards and not said a thing does something that I would consider 'toadish', I do immediately demote them onto my dollar store card list. :-)

And I do get some really ugly dollar store cards (on purpose). I have had a couple people then come up to me and asked if they had offended me in some way - because it dawns on them (sometimes subconsciously) they have received some pretty spectacular, nice, or cute cards historically and today they were the recipient of a card that is uglier/nastier than a dog's derri�re and subconsciously something clicks... just saying.;-)

And when I get a really ugly card I think to myself "I really need to shower that person with love." Either their life is so stressed that they had to put a stamp on something so ugly, or their mind is so scrambled that they think it's pretty...

Yea, a really ugly dollar store card tells everyone involved that something needs to be addressed here.

ROFL thanks for lifting my post-Christmas funk. I like your style :mrgreen:

lesliespringer 12-26-2015 09:10 AM

Well I have been making Christmas cards since '05 for all people on my list, even the ones that are in contact only at Christmas time.

Well these last 3 - 4 years I have seen a big drop on cards I receive. This year I sent out 36 hand made cards and 3 store bought cards.

I have received 10 Christmas cards this year. It's not that I don't get acknowledgement for the cards that I make and send out that bothers me, It's that I don't get Christmas cards back, and I don't think that's too much to ask.

I call it the "Social Media Problem" and lets just leave it at that.

So next year I vow to only make cards for selected family and friends. Store bought to only who sends me cards. Less stress in trying to make so many cards and different designs so relatives that live close to each other don't receive the same card.

I will spend my time, energy and enjoy making cards to just a few people. AND these cards will be soooo spectacular they will Never see a trash can and be Proudly Displayed for years to come!!!!!lol:p:smile::lol:

Takinmytyme 12-26-2015 11:27 AM

I work in a Public Library with a bunch of really nice ladies. Everyone got a Sour Cream holder of Hershey Chocolates. Only a few also got my amazing Christmas card. I have a few close friends who will get theirs late (because theirs are more elaborate.) The rest of my Christmas cards sent came from my local drugstore.
I hope every ones Holiday was special.

sunrisea 12-26-2015 01:34 PM

With all the work that goes into my cards, no two are the same, it does bother me when the effort is not appreciated; this year I solved the problem. I bought boxed cards and they go out to people I know don't care about home made cards or the time that goes into making them. It felt so good!

muscrat 12-26-2015 01:51 PM

I'm glad you are all finding solutions that make you happy! That's what card making is for me....happiness shared. Since the time I began making cards in late 2009 I have not bought a single card! Card making is therapy, sharing, caring etc. for me. I've spent a lot of money over these years on supplies so I love using them. I have some who have told me they have every single card I've ever sent, and then others who've probably only sent me a Christmas card as a felt duty to respond. Either way, I get such enjoyment out of making them and sharing them. I also use it as a ministry at church. I put a box in the foyer and many people have used them. About two weeks ago one woman even gave me $10 for supplies! (I wouldn't have taken it, but she gave it to my husband to give to me). I also use it as a prayer ministry to pray for the person who receives it. I'd say it's blessing me more than it is anyone else!

mheartm 12-26-2015 02:01 PM

Cobby - I also make and send cards because I love making them and cannot stand sitting in front of the tv for hours on end (even though I like whatever I am watching), I am going to say this. I made and sent 82 Christmas cards this year. I received 15 cards this year. That is actually more than usual. I don't even care if the cards are store bought at the dollar store as I know not everyone makes their own cards. I also send cards for every holiday and birthdays. So, now I am going to say this. There are 8 people in my stamp group. I get cards from maybe 5. And many of them don't even send birthday cards. And yes, I guess it bothers me. If we send cards to people because we care about them, what does it say when we don't send them cards. I am really going to purge my list this year. Some people (the elderly, widows etc.) will never get removed from my list....but some of the others...Hmmmm.

TexasGrammy 12-26-2015 02:34 PM

In my beginning year or two of stamping, I had hoped that people might acknowledge my handmade cards upon receipt. Over time, I came to understand that the rare comment/acknowlegement is sweet ... but not the norm at all. I find joy in sharing the art of card making. I share that joy via classes, online media, and sending/sharing my creations. If one can find joy in some or all of those practices, then it's truly a divine circle of on-going goodness & self-created blessing. It's much easier when we no longer place expectations on other people. They likely never knew of the expectation in the first place. ;)

mheartm 12-26-2015 02:43 PM

Cobby...I also have people who tell me that they love the cards I send them and keep them all. And, a friend stopped by recently and gave me an envelope and said "This is something I thought you could use." I thanked her and when I went into the house and opened the envelope I found a book of stamps. I was so touched. And sat right down to made her a thank you card and used one of her stamps on it. So, if you enjoy the process then enjoy it. I only hope I am bringing some sunshine into someone's day. I really think sending a card to someone tells them that someone is thinking of them today.

dillyb5 12-26-2015 04:34 PM

I have been sending Christmas cards hand crafted with love for years and would receive a few comments but this year I sent cards that I received in the mail you know the ones asking for donations from different organizations. Now I am getting comments about why I did not make special cards lol:)maybe next year

mungojerry 12-27-2015 02:31 AM

Making and sending cards brings me joy and I expect nothing in return. My only hope is the recipient puts the card in a recycling bin rather than a trash bin. :D

mheartm 12-27-2015 02:46 AM

A while ago I started putting a post-it inside the card with my signature on it so that the recipient can remove the post-it and send the card to someone else. I don't know if anyone does but several people had said the didn't know what to do with my cards so I thought this would solve that problem.

bdeyes9 12-27-2015 04:06 AM

This thread is a good one! I always want people to gush over my cards.. In fact I fantasize about the person receiving it's reaction as I make the card. Except for my stamp club cards I make every card with the person who I am giving it to in mind. I think of the person and what they like , how they are ETC. I enjoy this process. When I mail or am giving the card, I am actually saying I thought of you while making this card.
I have been making cards 9 years, recently I have had several people tell me they have saved every card. I have had a couple of friends pull out their cards and show me. Boy were those early cards bad!!! I do this because I love this creative outlet. If I make someones day by sending them a random card I'm happy!

QueenOfInkland 12-27-2015 05:09 AM

Rnruns60 - a resounding 'NO', it does not bother me if people don't appreciate my handmade cards, or anything else that I make handmade. It took me a little while to figure this out for myself after being disappointed when I made cards and recipients did not meet MY expectations that they would appreciate my effort, the keyword being 'MY'. Now I make whatever I make for the sheer joy that it brings to me to make it and I have no expectations whatsoever re: whether or not the recipient will 'appreciate' the effort. Of course, there are those 'kindred spirits' who totally appreciate the effort that it took for what I've created because they are like-minded.

mheartm 12-27-2015 12:28 PM

I still have the first cards I made. Due to a death in the family they never got sent out, so I get to look at them from time to time and have a good laugh. I have shared them with a few close friends. One of them said "You showed great promise". Isn't she kind?

contrapat 12-27-2015 12:49 PM

I don't send many cards, mostly just to the in-laws (Mum & Dad, and sister-in-law), in England. I always hear from Mum that they got/liked the card, and she usually tells me sister-in-law got/liked hers.

Mostly this is due to the year I sent her a handmade birthday card, and all she got was the empty envelope! (I did remake the card & resend) Now I seal all four edges with packing tape before mailing (regardless of how it affects the postage!).

International mailing can be an adventure- you never know exactly what the postal employee is going to insist on each time. There have been times when I was forced to fill out a declaration form just because the card had raised embellishments on it that could be felt! And the year that the cards were heavy, thick with layers, and contained chipboard ornaments to hang- it cost me $12 to send Mum's card that year.

I have found that anyone who crafts usually mentions getting a handmade card because they understand the effort put into it. Non-crafters may or may not comment.

My most used stamp of all is the "not Hallmark" (the word Hallmark, with the circle & slash over it) that I love to put on the back of my cards. I have an arsenal of back of card stamps, and THOSE usually prompt comments from the recipients. They range from goofy (nutrition counts for a card?) to explanatory (I took the time to make this for you...), and they all make it clear that this is not a mass produced item.


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