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Old 10-30-2012, 05:41 AM   #1103
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scrappingramma's Avatar
Join Date: Mar 2008
Location: Southeast Florida
Posts: 480

Sadly most divorced fathers just don't "get it". When I stopped making my self responsible for his relationship with his children, they started to learn the truth. They just aren't that important to him. My daughter is 33 and her father is alone again (3rd wife has left him, he is living in his 5th wheel, a couple of hours away from my daughter). He has called her, texted her for her birthday, and even came over for an overnight visit. This is the way he acts when he doesn't have a woman in his life. He has ignored her birthday for the better part of 7 years, because his wife didn't like my daughter. My daughter knows this, it hurts her feelings, but she is biding her time, waiting for him to screw up again. He did make a smart ***** remark to her and she let him know that she would not tolerat being treated that way in her own home. I'm so proud of her.

My daughter married someone just like her father, they are divorced and my granddaughter didn't have a relationship with her father for a long time. He requested to be stationed near his daughter in KY. She did the right thing and went to visit every other weekend. It took him a year to get a bed for her to sleep on. It wasn't that he didn't have the $$ to buy one, he had the $$ for trips and things he wanted, but she was not a high priority. When she would visit, he would go in his bedroom and leave her alone in the livingroom. After over a year of this, she finally decided that she didn't want to visit anymore,(she is 15) of course he took offense to this and behaved like a child. He told her that he didn't have to pay anything for her college, and she told him that when he is old and sick and she is a Dr. she didn't have to take care of him. She is a really good student, and will most likely get lots of scolarships for college.

In the long run, these men do nothing to build a foundation for their relationship with their kids and are surprised when the kids don't have the desire to have a relationship with them when they are grown.

Stay strong ladies.
Happiness is in the Heart, not in the Circumstances
My avatar is me with my grandchildren
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