It's taken me a while, but I finally have the evidence those of us on the Naughty list need. There had been rumors that Kelly (aka Shirmcat) had obtained her list of Naughty People by fraudulent means.
Being a Texas native, I contacted the Texas Rangers to find out the truth. They also had heard the rumors and were deeply distressed that a New Yawker would malign a Texan and give false info to another Texan (Jenn Balcer). They asked me to go on assignment to investigate. I was sent to the North Pole where the rumors originated and what I found was shocking, I tell you SHOCKING!!!
An elf who cannot be named (and is now in the witness protection program) had managed to snap this unretouched (ok, it's a little touched) photo of Shirmcat holding these characters hostage. At gunpoint, they were forced to name names and falsely accuse the people on the now infamous Naughty List. (The gun was later recovered and found to be a toy stolen from a Lone Ranger play set.)
You can see for yourselves, all these poor characters being made to stand w/ arms raised and in fear of the really tall and scary looking Kelly, disguised as a Dolly Mama. The Texas Rangers now have her on their wanted list and the sketch of Kelly is now posted throughout the country. It won't be long before she is apprehended.
Her motive is still unclear, but it is believed that Kelly wanted to make sure she received the best goodies at Christmas. When contacted, her family was not surprised and stated they always knew she would end up in a striped jumpsuit.
My blog:The Write Stuff. Sorry! I had to delete a bunch of really old posts from my blog & this is one of them.
Date: Wednesday, December 3, 2008 GMT Views: 1138
Favorited:10
Registered: March 3, 2005 Location: the frozen north Posts: 26930
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 8:10 AM
The Dolly Mama is known for violent tendencies . . . on the list of wanted characters in foreign lands . . . poor little Christmas peeps look so skeeered!
Registered: June 28, 2007 Location: SW Ohio Posts: 26692
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 8:13 AM
This is a RIOT! Too darn funny! This is really quite an amazing work of art! Even if it does have Kelly on it!! (Hee, hee, hee). The title and story are hilarious! This will be going into my fav's.
Registered: August 30, 2006 Location: Saugus, Massachusetts Posts: 65214
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 8:18 AM
Well - all these santa characters with their hands in the air really puts a different light on things - I am so confused about Kelly now - what ever has happened to her - or are you just trying to pull a fast one on us 'nice list' girls Julie?:???!?!?!?!
Kelly - Kelly - do you have any response to this severe accusation?????
I love your card Julie!!
------------------------------ Julia Aston Proud member of SCS Fan Club and Dirty Dozen Alumni, former DT member on Color Challenge My Blog
Registered: March 20, 2005 Location: Butler, PA Posts: 77633
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 8:21 AM
WELL, being one of the 'nice list gals' myself, I can only say nice things - like this is just too friggin' hilarious - what talent; what a devilish mind, what a naughty gal you are Julie!!! Sheer revenge perfection!!! Wonderful creation - sorry, Kelly - she really did do a great job with this - the imposter should be duly impressed!
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Registered: April 15, 2008 Location: Seattle Area Posts: 25018
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 9:33 AM
Ah do declare Julie! This is just hilarious! Y'all did such wonderful work on this! Ah do love that evidence you have uncovered! Ah nearly got the vapors. Ah'm just so sorry it took me so long to respond to Y'all. It's just that being a D*** Yankee, Ah had to go find a translator!
Well, I nevva! OK, perhaps once I did!
------------------------------ Twisted SistahCoping without Copics and Blogless in Seattle
Registered: September 12, 2004 Location: Redmond, Washington Posts: 54468
Thu, Dec 04, 2008 @ 10:01 AM
Julie, this is hysterical!! I am a character reference for Kelly and I think this may constitute defamation of character or some such legal mumbo jumbo. I am from the Nice list and I will be submitting a full report. This couldn't possibly be her, she would NEVER wear that thing on her head.
------------------------------ This is the day that the Lord has made. Let us rejoice and be glad in it.