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Old 09-04-2006, 02:43 PM   #281
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Andrew's asthma is back on track and he's back in his own bed.

Does anyone else have a child who does not feel pain or discomfort? Andrew feels sharp pain (falling down, bee sting, etc), but he does not feel pain or discomfort that comes on gradually (asthma attack). Consequently, we have gotten into scary situations with him because he doesn't know when he is seriously ill. As an example, he almost died from an infection at 3 yo that should have been excruciating, but the only sign I had of it was he stopped moving his neck and turning his entire body to look at things - he didn't complain a single time.

Does anyone else have experience with this and do you have any tips.
We have the opposite here. Our DS is a hypochondriac. If he even bumps his arm, it must then be broken and if someone else has a headache, his is worse. He will act like he is dying one second and something else comes up and it passes. We never know when to believe him.

As for the running away...He must hold my hand at all times if we are out. If for some reason he must let go he has to put one hand on my side so I know he is there. If he does not he wonders off even if he was told to just stand still. Any opprotunity and he is gone! I tried to explain this to my neices when they wanted to take him for a walk. They brought him back quick because he would not stay or obey.

Do any of you have kids who constantly argue with you in public? If we are at home or alone he listens ok. If we are somewhere else...example: We went to a picnic last week and everytime someone came to talk to us he would start an arguement about whatever we said, everytime. A few times I calmly told him that I was talking with an adult and he should wait and talk to me later. He then stands on the chair and says he will jump if he cannot talk. If I touch him to sit him down he sceams like he is being killed. The second they leave, he sits down and is quite. Sometimes he even says "Boy, was I naughty." and pouts. He is 5 and very smart but when other people come into the picture, he changes.
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Old 09-04-2006, 02:56 PM   #282
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Debbie, as far as your son acting up when other people are around.... Andrew gets overstimulated very easily and it's hard for us to be around people. Another thing it might be is that he doesn't socially know how to act. Aren't they so complicated? If we only knew!!

Do you guys go to any autism conferences? I've been looking for one to go to that's not to far away.
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Old 09-05-2006, 01:17 AM   #283
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Thank you everyone for the support. It was a terrifing experience, but also a learning one. Hopefully this week, Andrew will start school. Since we only have one car, I can not drive him and have to wait for the bus transportation office to call me with the pick up-drop off times. Andrew will be attending a special class for Autistic children at one of the neighboring schools within the district. Kindergarten started today - district wide and it might have been too much for him anyway. I believe Andrew will be taught a Kindergarten cirriculum, just in the special ed class. Now I worry about him adjusting to a new school, he did so well at his other in the states.
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Old 09-07-2006, 06:02 AM   #284
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Andrew had a very good first day of school. I was worried that he'd be upset getting on the van without me this morning. He looked back at me, but wasn't crying. The teacher's notes said he asked to go potty many times and went successfully. He put together puzzles and painted. Asked for his favorite cheese cracker. She said he did cry a little in the morning, but settled down after awhile.

I feel so much better, I had been thinking about him all day. I'm confident he'll do fine at his new school.
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Old 09-07-2006, 06:08 AM   #285
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Christine,
So glad Andrew had a good first day of school.

Gina, I haven't been to any conferences yet. It's hard to get away from the kids. I know RDi does conferences a lot of places. Also you might check out the ASA website and see if they have any info on conferences. Hope you find something. Well, wait I have been to a TASK(team of advocates for special kids) workshop. It was custom tailored to military families so the info was great. That would be something to ask the base EFMP coordinator about. HTH.
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Old 09-07-2006, 06:09 PM   #286
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So, wanna hear how my day went?!!

Yesterday was Andrew's first day of school. He was having some anxiety in the morning and having some sensory problems with his cords, but he actually got out of the car and went to the school when we got there!!! Yeah!

Last night when we got home, Andrew started crying and had a major melt down and said he wasn't going back to school because he has to write in cursive this year. He finally fell asleep, still upset.

Today..... Andrew gets up on the fight! He is NOT going to school and mom can't make me and on and on and on! I finally got him in the car, drove the 20 minutes to school with him crying and screaming the whole way. Get to school and Andrew wasn't going in. I take my daughter in and leave Andrew in the car, he runs in after me when he can't see me anymore. I take him to his room, he won't go in. The principal comes to talk to Andrew and he runs out of the school. About 5 minutes later the principal comes in and asks for my car keys... Andrew locked himself in the car and wouldn't come out.

Finally about 30 minutes later, he gets Andrew out of the car and to a picnic table closer to the school. I was waiting in my room (I do preschool and afterschool program), and at 9:00 I heard someone screaming down the hallway, sure enough...... it was Andrew. At 9:15 he was still screaming, cussing, kicking, punching and destroying everything he could get his hands on. The principal FINALLY got him calmed down and then he totally loses it AGAIN! The counselor had to come in and help. He finally went into his classroom, but it was after 11:00. So, we had 3 hours of having a big meltdown....... I AM SO EXHAUSTED TONIGHT!!!

Sorry to ramble, I just had to get that out, though!

Here are a couple pics.... first one is yesterday, first day of school. Second pic is today, second day of school! (Yes, he is hiding under the covers on the couch and not moving!!!)
Attached Thumbnails
first-second-day-school0004.jpg   first-second-day-school0006.jpg  
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Old 09-07-2006, 08:25 PM   #287
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Gina,
(((HUGS))) I'm so sorry you and Andrew had such a bad day today. Hope tomorrow goes smoothly.
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Old 09-07-2006, 08:38 PM   #288
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Gina (((HUGS))) wow you had quite a day i'd be totally wiped too, it is so hard to see them go through these meltdowns and not jump in and do what moms do, but to let it run it's course. I know when Megan has a meltdown at school and I happen to be there it is so hard for me not to say OK I'm taking her home! But instead I let her aides do what they are so good at calming her down and refocusing her to be able to go on with her day. I am so thankful everyday that I have a wonderful team of people to be with us every step of the way. As they say it takes a village to raise a child.

Wishing you all the best tomorrow!
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Old 09-07-2006, 08:49 PM   #289
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Christine, that's wonderful! I'm glad the new school is working out so far

Gina, ugh! What a difficult day you had. HUGS! I would have wanted to just take him home. It is so hard to see them upset and sad.


Our Andrew has had a good time so far at his new school. His only real problem was at afternoon recess today. He fell and bloodied both knees quite badly - blood had run quite a ways down his leg. He is usually very quick to look for attention when he falls, but he was so scared about not knowing the recess supervisors that he didn't tell anyone. He just suffered in quiet - he must have terrified because that is so atypical. I think I'll mention it to the teacher tomorrow and maybe she can have the recess supervisors (not teachers) to come into the grade 1 class and introduce themselves and maybe spend a few minutes with the kids to make the kids more comfortable.
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Old 09-07-2006, 08:51 PM   #290
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BTW, Andrew is tbe boy in my avatar. In the picture he is working hard at clearing the beach of all driftwood. He got everything into the water that was less than about 6-7 feet long.
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Old 09-08-2006, 07:43 PM   #291
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Thanks everyone! Andrew did much better today. I really thought he was going to have a bad day because he had to go to school on a Friday. We have a 4 day school week and don't go on Friday's usually. Since this was the first week of school, we had to go today since we didn't start until Wednesday. Anyway, he kept telling us last night that he wasn't going because it was Friday and he doesn't go to school on Fridays!

Karen, your Andrew is so cute and reminds me of my son! Looks like something he would be doing!
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Old 09-08-2006, 07:46 PM   #292
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Hey everyone, I have a question for you!

What color of hair does your autistic child have?
What color of eyes?
Is your child female or male?

The reason I'm asking is when Andrew was about 3, his OT told me that 90% of her patients were boys with blonde hair and blue eyes! I found this very interesting!
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Old 09-09-2006, 06:48 AM   #293
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Glad Andrew did better yesterday. My guys both male... Caleb has brown eyes and dirty blond hair, and Luke has blue eyes and blond hair. There are some blond and blue eyed kids in Luke's class, but not too many in Caleb's. It is interesting though.
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Old 09-09-2006, 06:52 AM   #294
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Megan has
Green eyes
dark brown hair
female
Guess we are the other 10%
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Old 09-09-2006, 09:03 AM   #295
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Quote:
Originally Posted by emmiestamps
Megan has
Green eyes
dark brown hair
female
Guess we are the other 10%
Yep! I just thought it was interesting! After she said that, I did notice that many of the kids at Children's Care Hospital did fit the male, blue, blonde!
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Old 09-09-2006, 10:35 AM   #296
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Josh has blonde hair and green eyes

Quote:
Originally Posted by usbornegina
Hey everyone, I have a question for you!

What color of hair does your autistic child have?
What color of eyes?
Is your child female or male?

The reason I'm asking is when Andrew was about 3, his OT told me that 90% of her patients were boys with blonde hair and blue eyes! I found this very interesting!
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Old 09-09-2006, 12:00 PM   #297
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Quote:
Originally Posted by usbornegina
Hey everyone, I have a question for you!

What color of hair does your autistic child have?
What color of eyes?
Is your child female or male?

The reason I'm asking is when Andrew was about 3, his OT told me that 90% of her patients were boys with blonde hair and blue eyes! I found this very interesting!
Male
Hazel eyes
light brown hair that used to be blonde through preschool

Most of the students I have taught that had autism had dark brown hair.
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Old 09-09-2006, 02:53 PM   #298
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My Taylor is a male - blond hair, blue eyes. He's the only blond in his class this year though.
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Old 09-09-2006, 08:40 PM   #299
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My Brandon (6) has blonde hair and green/blue eyes.
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Old 09-10-2006, 06:02 AM   #300
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Gina,
What a tough day you had last week. Isn't it great to have people to share it with who understand exactly what you are going through? I know when I try to tell others some just say "Boy, was he naughty" not wanting to understand how he works.

My Seth is 5, light brown hair and beautiful blue eyes. He has my sister's eyes (His birth mother)
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Old 09-11-2006, 03:36 AM   #301
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My Andrew has blonde hair and blue eyes....very interesting.
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Old 09-11-2006, 04:44 AM   #302
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Quote:
Originally Posted by usbornegina
Hey everyone, I have a question for you!

What color of hair does your autistic child have?
What color of eyes?
Is your child female or male?

The reason I'm asking is when Andrew was about 3, his OT told me that 90% of her patients were boys with blonde hair and blue eyes! I found this very interesting!
My Andrew has blond hair and blue eyes. I'm also beginning to wonder after reading this thread, what percentage are named Andrew
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Old 09-11-2006, 10:00 AM   #303
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Interesting on the survey! I don't think it's 90/10 though!

Also, on the name Andrew.... it's not the first time I've met other Andrew's like our Andrew's!! Hmmmm....!!!

My Andrew had another bad morning going to school. I left him in the office with the principal. Andrew was screaming when I left. I'll have to see if he made it to his classroom before 11:00 today. Ugh!

I hope everyone's having a good day. How are all of your kids coping with school?
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Old 09-14-2006, 03:58 PM   #304
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Hi, I just found this thread. We have been going through a really rough time for the past few weeks and Heather recommended that I come over here. I have a 13 yo DS who was diagnosed with Asperger's & ADHD in 4th grade. He is bright, but has the usual Aspie problems with social skills, stress, noise etc. For some reason he hit rock bottom with 8th grade. Every day when he got in the car and I asked how his day went the answer was "Stressful." His mid-term report came home and he had 2 Fs! He forgot to mention that when I had pneumonia, he just wasn't doing his homework. I decided to step back as a demo for a while so that I can be there for him. I have been to school twice this year meeting with the Asst. Principal (who is wonderful) but the teachers on his team didn't know what Asperger's was! I gave them handouts and talked to them about him specifically, but a few of them just don't want to deal with anything but NT. His biggest fear is failing. He has been picked on by teachers and peers for most of his little life.

I am fortunate in that I have read everything I could get my hands on so that I can stop trouble pretty quickly. I feel so bad for him because he has talked about suicide and keeps asking me why he isn't "normal." I have Lupus so I tell him some days I feel the same way. We just have to work through it and take one day at a time. I wish I could just make it all better.

I do feel like I have landed in Holland some days and so does he.
Thanks for letting me vent a little.
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Old 09-14-2006, 04:13 PM   #305
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Hi and Welcome Katiestamper, I'm sorry to hear that you are having a rough go lately. The ladies here are great pillars of support, so vent away.
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Old 09-14-2006, 04:24 PM   #306
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Katie,
This is a great place to read and vent! I'm still in the major read, read everything I can. I hope things go smoother for you!
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Old 09-14-2006, 09:21 PM   #307
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aw, hi katiestamper - we're all wondering around in Holland too - welcome! some days are wonderful and some days are rougher than any of us could've ever imagined - vent away our new friend - you're in the right place!
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Old 09-15-2006, 11:47 AM   #308
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I have some books that I bought when Connor was younger for teaching social skills and just general info about working with these guys (girls). They need a new home as they are too far in the past for us. I am currently reading about sex and adolescence. Very scary. The one is "Social Stories" by Carol Gray. I also have the Mind Reading software, but I need to find the registration key. I will post the titles of the other books when I get home. I found most of them very helpful.
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Old 09-16-2006, 01:19 AM   #309
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What is Mind Reading? Jacob's social worker is using biofeed back with him and the title is mind something, and it is computer program that plays kind of like a game. Just wondering if it is the same thing.
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Old 09-16-2006, 08:01 AM   #310
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It is a computer program and probably the same one. It teaches them how to read facial expressions and learn to interpret tone of voice. I was playing with him one day and I didn't get them all right. It is much more subtle than just happy, sad, angry, confused. I need to get the key though if I want to pass it on. Hope that helps. It is a really good program and very expensive to buy on your own. I wish we had a lending library between us to keep the costs down.
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Old 09-18-2006, 07:30 AM   #311
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Quote:
Originally Posted by katiestamper
Hi, I just found this thread. We have been going through a really rough time for the past few weeks and Heather recommended that I come over here. I have a 13 yo DS who was diagnosed with Asperger's & ADHD in 4th grade. He is bright, but has the usual Aspie problems with social skills, stress, noise etc. For some reason he hit rock bottom with 8th grade. Every day when he got in the car and I asked how his day went the answer was "Stressful." His mid-term report came home and he had 2 Fs! He forgot to mention that when I had pneumonia, he just wasn't doing his homework. I decided to step back as a demo for a while so that I can be there for him. I have been to school twice this year meeting with the Asst. Principal (who is wonderful) but the teachers on his team didn't know what Asperger's was! I gave them handouts and talked to them about him specifically, but a few of them just don't want to deal with anything but NT. His biggest fear is failing. He has been picked on by teachers and peers for most of his little life.

I am fortunate in that I have read everything I could get my hands on so that I can stop trouble pretty quickly. I feel so bad for him because he has talked about suicide and keeps asking me why he isn't "normal." I have Lupus so I tell him some days I feel the same way. We just have to work through it and take one day at a time. I wish I could just make it all better.

I do feel like I have landed in Holland some days and so does he.
Thanks for letting me vent a little.
Welcome Mary Kate. Isn't it so stressful. My son doesn't understand that he's not normal (not that I know of anyway), and it just breaks my heart to know that these kids do eventually realize they are not normal.

Hugs to you.....
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Old 09-18-2006, 07:34 AM   #312
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I meant Mary Kay.... not Mary Kate. SORRY!

Andrew is still having a terrible time going to school. He has been running away everyday. Last Tuesday he didn't get in his classroom until 11:30. He was gone Wed and Thursday because he had appt's Wednesday and oral surgery Thursday. We don't have school on Friday's so he was off 5 days. I left him at school today screaming and kicking, etc.

Ugh.
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Old 09-18-2006, 08:59 PM   #313
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Hi everyone,

My DS Garrett 4yrs, was just diagnosed with autism (asbergers they think) on Thursday. Poor guy has had such a rough start. Injured during birth with a brachial plexus injury, right arm paralysis. 2 1/2 years of physical therapy and by the grace of God recovery.

I've always known something else was off, but everyone here was not on the bandwagon with me. He has been so borderline, they have had to fudge his reports to qualify him for services. He started Speech at 2 1/2 which seemed to help, then transitioned to our school district speech and language pre-K program at 3 years. I finally got his doctor to realize something wasn't right at his 4 year check up....ie.. his picky PICKY eating, trouble in large group or overstimulating settings etc.

Some of our specialist think the dx may be off and it may be a Sensory Integration problem, but since that is not a recognized diagnosis, he will be settled here. Not sure what to make of this inconsistency.

Thanks for the thread!
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Old 09-18-2006, 09:06 PM   #314
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Bobbi,

Children with very high-functioning autism have it the worst...many aren't diagnosed until middle-to-late elementary school. The fact that he has a diagnosis is a good thing...even if the diagnosis is incorrect. At least he can begin services. If, at a later time, they feel the diagnosis is incorrect, they may redo his evaluation, but in the meantime those services are going to serve him well. Early intervention is key!

Good luck to both of you.
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Old 09-18-2006, 09:14 PM   #315
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Hi, Bobbi

When my daughter was diagnosed at 18 months the specialist gave her Autism , he said at that age he was pretty certain it would be correct but also stated at that age alot could change but would give her the autism dx so she could receive the most services. She is high functioning and a few others have said maybe pdd autistic tendancies, but now that she is 10 and we can see more clearly now she definatley has autism, I am glad I never let her dx be reconsidered.
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Old 09-19-2006, 05:56 PM   #316
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Sharon & Kelly,

Thanks to you both! I agree that the services can do nothing but help him! I'm sad and relieved all at once! Finally he's more than just a high maintenance child, but still.... My Pediatrician was worried I wouldn't be ok, and I said "I might cry and whine right now, but funny thing is ... I walked into this door and out of this door with the same exact child with the same exact behaviors - but now you named it - a label. My kid has been labeled, but I'll be fine after I act like a crybaby for a day or so!" Goofy Mommy that I am, at least I'm secure with my whiny-ness!

I'm thrilled that we were able to get him help this young. After everything else he has already gotten through, I know this one will be fine too! He's one heck of a trooper! Now if his parents could be so strong and together!!!

Thanks again for everyone's input on this thread! You've all helped me a bunch!
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Old 09-19-2006, 07:47 PM   #317
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Gina, Sorry Andrew is still having such a hard time. It really wears on you I know. Hopefully, it will get easier as the school year goes on. I'll be thinking about you.

Bobbi - Welcome. What a good attitude you have. I have to agree with the other gals. The label opens lots of doors for therapy especially in CA with the regional centers. Good luck on your journey, and feel free to come here and vent or ask questions anytime.
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:03 PM   #318
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I have a question for everyone. What do you mean by "services." We have and IEP in place, Connor is considered disabled. He is in a Social Skills group at school. But everything else that gets done for him with the school I spend time documenting and setting up meetings. I also pay for the Pediatric Neurologist and Psychologist. What am I missing? Thanks for your help.
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:58 PM   #319
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We have had
EIBI before kindergarten
Speech

And in school we have
Speech
RDI (relationship development intervention)
Lifeskills
Adapted swimming
Fulltime aide

Becuase we are canadian all specialist (dr's) are covered we pay nothing.
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Old 09-20-2006, 12:59 PM   #320
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Sorry we also have the IEP.
I hope this helps, the other ladies will probably have more to add to the list.
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