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Old 06-27-2006, 06:45 AM   #41
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Kristin,
Your Dh looks great bald!

As far as sleep- Luke sleeps well. Caleb not well at all. We've recently started giving him melatonin which is helping. He would not be able to fall asleep until like 11:00 and then often wake in the night around 3:00 ready to party. That makes for one grumpy Mama. He would do that a couple of times a week. He doesn't take naps, but he alwaya acted tired. It's better since the melatonin. He goes to sleep around 8:15. And only wakes up once a week or so. And he isn't it quite the "Party, party" mood when he does. He's much more mellow and usually will stay in bed and look at books or play quietly.
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Old 06-27-2006, 06:46 AM   #42
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Okay I meant your DS.
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Old 06-27-2006, 06:50 AM   #43
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Question how well to your kids take to bathing, haircuts,etc. Megan used to be good for bathing now a nightmare, hates bathing but loves swimming? haircuts have always been difficult, the last year she has been better, actually asks to have it cut but still has a hard sitting still through it.
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Old 06-27-2006, 07:28 AM   #44
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Question how well to your kids take to bathing, haircuts,etc. Megan used to be good for bathing now a nightmare, hates bathing but loves swimming? haircuts have always been difficult, the last year she has been better, actually asks to have it cut but still has a hard sitting still through it.

J hates hair cuts and toe nail cutting - both a battle requiring major rewards/bribes! I let him bite his fingernails so that's one less battle!
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Old 06-27-2006, 07:35 AM   #45
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Megan does the same thing she bites at the corner of her nail and pulls it off, one less fight over here, she loves her toe nails to be painted. Brushing her teeth and hair herself most of time as well, so I don't have to fight her on that either. Mostly bathing she just hates taking off her six watches at bathtime, next time I will buy waterproof ones.
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Old 06-27-2006, 08:33 AM   #46
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J loves the water so that's OK - he fights with the toothbrush - in fact he's just lost his front two top teeth in the space of 3 days - makes brushing a whole lot easier as they wobbled for nearly 4 months!
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Old 06-27-2006, 08:34 AM   #47
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Kelly - what do you do? Maybe we could find out a bit about each other as well?
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Old 06-27-2006, 10:46 AM   #48
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Oh! I would love to join this thread!! Boy do I need some support around here! We think we have at least 3 of our kids with aspergers (age 6,4,3). We also have a 4 month old baby, so I haven't had much time to post anything in a while. I did'nt even have time to read most of the posts on this topic yet, but will try and catch up when I'm feeding the baby. I just wanted to intoduce myself and I hope to get to know you all!! I'll check back in really soon!
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Old 06-27-2006, 10:51 AM   #49
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Luke loves baths. Doesn't like getting his hair washed, but he does okay. Caleb was the same until last week. NOw we practically have to force him. My husband asked me, "Don't neurotypicals want to walk around all smelly at this age?" We're hoping it will pass.

Haircuts- We bring lots of those little dumdum lollipops. This is the only time the kids get them. It all started when Caleb got his first haircut and the stylist gave him one. He sat so nicely she gave him one everytime we went. Now we live somewhere else, but still give them suckers. I think you have to find an understanding stylist too.
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Old 06-27-2006, 12:13 PM   #50
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Hi Andi welcome, wow you have a lot on your plate,glad to have you here.
Well as Fioana asked we should get to know one another. I'm Kelly age 33 I did work part-time at a local health food store, I recently quit always worked weekends, it was hard to never be able to take the kids camping etc. I'll take the summer off and look for employment in the fall, maybe at our local grocery store, I used to work as a recptionist before the kids since then just kind of part time work, I like being home with them.
I am married (2nd marriage) to a wonderful man he loves these girls so much, we had been friends for years before we got together so he is my very best friend. I have only one sister my hubby has 3 sisters and 3 brothers. We are really laid back don't care much for the fast lane, I love stamping and scrapping, I also like to spend time with family and friends, church activities, not much of an outside person, don't like the heat at all yet I live in the sunny okanagan.
I would like more children, my tubes are tied trying to save to have them reversed need $5250 ouch, in order to raise it I may have go back to work full time in fall. We have one dog 2 cats and hundreds of fish hubby breeds bettas in his spare time.
I can't think of anything else at the moment.Looking forward to hearing about you ladies.
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Old 06-27-2006, 12:17 PM   #51
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I totally agree with needing a understanding hairdresser we now have a hairdresser that has had success with Megan she is actually Megan's aides niece, she has been busy so i did the last cut myself, but she was great brought a couple of mirrors, brushes, siccors, asked megan whitch ones she wanted use, went over really well. Megan is always happier when a choice is available.
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Old 06-27-2006, 02:25 PM   #52
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Wow Kelly - what a busy life you lead - glad to hear you like scrapping as well! I've just started, guess what my favourite topic is!

Well let me tell you a bit about me - My name is Fiona, usually answer to Fi, I am 39 married to Bruce for 14 years (where has the time gone!) have one son (would like more!) and a dog Bassett Hound Sam plus numerous goldfish! I live in Kent in the UK and love crafting of all sorts especially stamping.

I work part time teaching PSHE and Childcare in a Special Needs school and in my spare time (ha!) I run a craft club and do demos and classes with a friend. We don't have stampin up over here so I use lots of the techniques here but using stamps from the UK. I love music, sing with a choir, enjoy cooking and reading.

DH has retrained as a teacher after being made redundant in the City and is now very happy with a life at school and all the long school holidays off!

That's me and mine - look forward to hearing about everyone else.
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Old 06-27-2006, 04:08 PM   #53
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You all are busy ladies. I'm Laura. I've just got the 2 little boys, and one crazy dog. I'm married to a wonderful man who also happens to be one of the few, the proud, the United States Marines. So we get to see all sorts of new places and meet new people. We're currently in Riverside, CA. We'll be here another year or so. I was a preschool teacher before we had kids, and now I'm a stay in the van (and cart these boys around) mom. I'm also a Stampin' Up! demo, but I'm my own best customer.
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Old 06-27-2006, 04:38 PM   #54
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[
Eating is tough for us. Aaron prefers cereal. Both prefer junk. It's hard keeping them out of junk, so I tend not to buy it. For a long time they only hate yellow or white things (chicken nuggets, mac-n-cheese, fries, corn). Then of course we've been on the PB&J kicks, then just plain PB, then PB&Fluff...each for about 1.5 years. Neither kid is much of a meat eater. They'll really only eat chicken. No casseroles. I hate meal planning.[/QUOTE]


Funny who somethings are so second nature, I forget they are not normal. We also deal with eating issues. He will not try anything new if he doesn't like the look of it, likes french fries but won't try any other form of potato. He's been a picky eater from birth but has gotten worse the older he is getting. Used to eat grilled cheese sandwiches, won't touch them now. Planning meals are so hard, a lot of times I end up making a meal for DH & me and something else for David.

Obsessions are trains, trucks and spongebob. He left a train at daycare one day and realized it after we were home, he had a major meltdown and wouldn't calm down until we went back to get it. His meltdowns are not as frequent as they used to be. He mainly has them if something like the train incident happens, when his routine is off track. He has also become a lot easier to deal with when it happens as he's become older. He normally can be reasoned with.

David sometimes likes to make "train" noises while playing with his trains. They can be really high pitch and annoying at times, we've learned to tell him to park the train at the station to quite him when it gets too loud.

His social skills are really improving, he will introduce himself to people at the park and ask them what their names are.

I have been working full-time since David was 2. We are blessed to have a wonderful daycare that has worked with him. This summer will be his last year at his daycare and I know he will miss it next year. He loves going there and playing all day with the other kids. I'm not sure what we will do next summer. I don't feel comfortable sending him to a private sitter.

Thanks to everyone for sharing your stories. It's great to know we are going through this alone.
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Old 06-28-2006, 05:55 AM   #55
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[
Eating is tough for us. Aaron prefers cereal. Both prefer junk. It's hard keeping them out of junk, so I tend not to buy it. For a long time they only hate yellow or white things (chicken nuggets, mac-n-cheese, fries, corn). Then of course we've been on the PB&J kicks, then just plain PB, then PB&Fluff...each for about 1.5 years. Neither kid is much of a meat eater. They'll really only eat chicken. No casseroles. I hate meal planning.


Funny who somethings are so second nature, I forget they are not normal. We also deal with eating issues. He will not try anything new if he doesn't like the look of it, likes french fries but won't try any other form of potato. He's been a picky eater from birth but has gotten worse the older he is getting. Used to eat grilled cheese sandwiches, won't touch them now. Planning meals are so hard, a lot of times I end up making a meal for DH & me and something else for David.

Obsessions are trains, trucks and spongebob. He left a train at daycare one day and realized it after we were home, he had a major meltdown and wouldn't calm down until we went back to get it. His meltdowns are not as frequent as they used to be. He mainly has them if something like the train incident happens, when his routine is off track. He has also become a lot easier to deal with when it happens as he's become older. He normally can be reasoned with.

David sometimes likes to make "train" noises while playing with his trains. They can be really high pitch and annoying at times, we've learned to tell him to park the train at the station to quite him when it gets too loud.

His social skills are really improving, he will introduce himself to people at the park and ask them what their names are.

I have been working full-time since David was 2. We are blessed to have a wonderful daycare that has worked with him. This summer will be his last year at his daycare and I know he will miss it next year. He loves going there and playing all day with the other kids. I'm not sure what we will do next summer. I don't feel comfortable sending him to a private sitter.

Thanks to everyone for sharing your stories. It's great to know we are going through this alone.[/QUOTE]

I can completely relate to the fries thing Megan will also eat fries but not any other form of potato.
I can relate as well to the leaving behind of objects, I have had to drive her back to school to get her molly dolly before, grandma has has to bring toys or books back in the evening after megan has realized she had left them behind.
Megan also makes loud noises while playing lately it has been role playing with the Cars toys from Mc Donalds, reinacting the movie. Stephanie always plays horses and has a neigh as loud as a real horse, or she whistles, both are high pitched sounds.
It is so nice to hear there are other people going through the same things as we are, I too forget my girls are not your average kids.
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Old 06-28-2006, 05:56 AM   #56
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Don't know what happened with the quote thing kind of merged everything.
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:17 AM   #57
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I finally had a few minutes to read all the post so far. You all are making me feel so sane!! It's nice to know there are so many others that know exactly what it's like in my world!! I can usually read posts while nursing, but not so good at typing with only one hand, but I will sneak on and update you on some of our issues.
I thought I would start out telling you more about me. I will be 33 on Sunday. I have been married to my Dh for 8 years. I have an 11 year old stepson that lives with his mom in Sweden. As for the group we have here... Teegan is 6, Gavin is 4, Keelin is 3, and little Bergen is 4 months old. I am a SAHM that never seems to get anything done!! We live in Northern Minnesota.
I have issues with the kids sleeping, eating, staying dressed, meltdowns, obbsessions, I could go on, and on, they are all different, so I have to learn how to deal with each one differently. It's a ton of work. My Dh works full time, is in school full time and travels alot, so It's pretty much up to me to do everything on my own. I haven't had time to stamp in more than a year!!
My Dh will be gone on Saturday for 3 1/2 weeks, so maybe I can get on here in the evening and catch up with all of you. He usually uses the computer when he is home for school.
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:18 AM   #58
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This is so great - its really nice to meet you ladies!

Here's a little something to ponder! I went to a seminar by Tony Attwood who's a reknowned bod in the field of ASD in Australia (he's British and comes over a lot!) He said that one of his interns noticed that of all the children he see's in his clinic a high proportion of them began with the letter J. We called our son Joshua, it was the name I had picked out even before I was pregnant! I wonder if there's any truth in this?
Hi! He's (Tony Attwood) well known to "Aspie Moms" in the states, too! One of my favorite lines from TA is that he says the only difference in HFA (high functioning autism) and AS (Asperger Syndrome) is the spelling!
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:33 AM   #59
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I haven't had time to sit down & read all of these, but will intro myself for those I've not 'met' online yet!

I'm Mom to 2 special kids. Bethany, my older dd is almost 10. I ALWAYS (I mean, from the beginning when she SCREAMED non stop instead of eating & sleeping) knew she was not "normal" at least according to the books. No doctor would believe me that she was not normal. She was just "slow at developing certain skills, but she'd catch up" is what I heard all the time. Yet, she had developed other skills long before she should have. I laughed about the only thing she did on time was getting her first tooth! She could do those tiny motor skills (push buttons, find the hole in the toy where the screw goes in---yeah, all kids under a year old turn their toys over to find the screw holes, and so much more of the "intricate" things), she was mimicking voice by the time she was 3 mos. Was saying multiple sounds by 5 mos. and spoke words well before a year. At 13 mos. I had her in the carseat in the back & was sitting with her (we were so goofy---one of us ALWAYS sat with her!). I sang "the itsy bitsy spider" and she was doing the hand motions--or trying! Yet, she had never taken a step, and didn't til nearly 18 mos.! Socially, she just was not "there". By 4, she could not answer "yes/no" questions.

She was dx'd right after turning 5, only because I pushed & pushed for the "approval" to get her tested. Love insurance & doctors---ha!

At that time I could not leave her without a MAJOR meltdown. I had decided to homeschool (which I am glad Tony Attwood supports---it gives me a bit more "accredidation" though I really am not that concered about what others think---but that, and my teaching degree at least keep me from the "20 questions about homeschooling game). I could not leave her in a Sunday school class. We started going to a co-op for homeschool mainly so she could get used to other kids in a SMALL safe environment knowing I would be there. She really hated it at first. AT birthday parties she would hide under the tables. She would not eat in front of anyone but us. On & on the list goes.

As an encouragement to those with younger kids, this week she is at Vacation Bible School with a friend! Her sister is there, too, but they are not in the same group. She is with the 2nd graders (she plays better w/ younger kids). I sit with her during the first "assembly" time, then leave her. She goes, but I can see a fear in her walk and her face. Still, she GOES! It is such an improvement! She also LOVES co-op & playing with friends! She wants to play with friends every day! That is one reason I homeschool. I want her to have time to play with friends for social development, so we school for less than what a class day would be and the rest of the time is "life skills" . A lot of how we do school is life skills, not so much workbooks.

My big concern now is that she is hitting "pre-teen" days. She is nowhere near puberty officially, but she is going through an emotional stage, which other moms say is normal at this age. Great, she chooses THIS to be "normal!" LOL! At least she is showing emotions! BOY, is she! I am trying to be firm, but still loving. I tend to "cave" easily to her. She is very tender hearted, which is so atypical of Aspies! She is also very giving, which is atypical.

Quickly, my other dd is 7 1/2, has ADHD, OCD & other alphabet soup! She's too social!

Looking forward to visiting more.
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:03 PM   #60
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. She is very tender hearted, which is so atypical of Aspies! She is also very giving, which is atypical.

.
Lori,
Thanks for sharing. I get a giggle out of experts telling me what is "typical" for ASD anymore. Because the more ASD kids I meet the more I think maybe there is no typical. Caleb is

Okay I must go now. Caleb obviously thinks I was ignoring his request for water play so he just made his own spit puddle in the hallway to play in. Anyone want to get their suit???
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:14 PM   #61
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Lori,
Thanks for sharing. I get a giggle out of experts telling me what is "typical" for ASD anymore. Because the more ASD kids I meet the more I think maybe there is no typical. Caleb is

Okay I must go now. Caleb obviously thinks I was ignoring his request for water play so he just made his own spit puddle in the hallway to play in. Anyone want to get their suit???
I've got my swimsuit all ready Laura! It's funny isn't it - how different they all are even though they have similar diagnosis (Sp!)

J can be left on his own for ages - he doesn't wreck, explore, mess up, destroy or anything 'cos that would be against the rules (I love THE RULES!) , whereas his friend who has dyspraxia spends the whole time trying to find out how it works and the breaking point!
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:17 PM   #62
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OK - this is not to offend anyone, but do you call other kids normal? Not that mine isn't! he's all the normal I've ever known! it's just that everything is so PC now and here in the UK we have to talk about children having whatever difficulty eg Joshua is a child showing the signs of ASD. I find it such a mouthful that I have normals and Aspies - am I gonna offend anyone with using normal?
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:23 PM   #63
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I am very excited about tomorrow - J goes to a mainstream primary school and gets very little support from the state, he struggles and we have bad times and good, but he told me (in a by the way sort of way) that tomorrow at school mass he's going to be reading. I am so chuffed - he usually gets missed out of doing anything like that 'cos he can be unpredictable, but his teacher this year is great, so he gets to read - the good thing is he's got a great memory and this won't phase him one bit - he's got the AS that thinks everyone wants to listen to him and loves him to bits! Anyone else have the confident sort? The child that cannot imagine that you don't want to listen to a 3 hour verbal on how the wheels on a low loader lorry are doubled up etc yawn yawn! You can't even call them a conversation, 'cos you're not supposed to have an answer!

Well I'm excited about tomorrow - thank goodness he told me as I wasn't going to go to mass in the afternoon and then I'd have missed it!

I shall bore you all silly tomorrow with how he did!

Going to bed now as its very late here - nearly 11.30 pm and I need as much beauty sleep as I can get.

Have a good day ladies and hope all your troubles are little ones that are now fast asleep!
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:36 PM   #64
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Fiona,

I'm so excited for you all. Can't wait to here how well he does.
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Old 06-28-2006, 02:43 PM   #65
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Oh and "normal" doesn't offend me. OUr dev ped calls typical developing kids neurotypicals or NTs. That term makes me laugh for some reason. I always want to say, "Oh my goodness. That child is neurotypical!" It sounds so technical I guess. Okay, I never said I had a "normal" sense of humor.
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Old 06-28-2006, 06:17 PM   #66
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Wow themrs you sure sound like you have a lot to contend with, must be hard with hubby on the road. my went away for the first time this month it was only for a week and I felt a little overwhelmed.
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Old 06-28-2006, 06:23 PM   #67
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Hi, Lori! Welcome. It's nice to hear of someone else with girls almost everyone I have met has boys. Your oldest and My oldest sound like they started life out the same way, Stephanie cried and cried didn't eat or sleep much, she seemed to talk on schedule though and she was early to walk 7 months old ran by 8 months old. She has mellowed a lot over the years. Both my girls have entered puberty both are now wearing bras fulltime and I don't think it will be long before they get a monthly visitor. I am very scared at how they will handle the change.
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Old 06-28-2006, 06:25 PM   #68
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HaHa my Speech path. calls them neuro typical too I alway get a kick out of it too....lol
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:00 PM   #69
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Originally Posted by fiona
This is so great - its really nice to meet you ladies!

Here's a little something to ponder! I went to a seminar by Tony Attwood who's a reknowned bod in the field of ASD in Australia (he's British and comes over a lot!) He said that one of his interns noticed that of all the children he see's in his clinic a high proportion of them began with the letter J. We called our son Joshua, it was the name I had picked out even before I was pregnant! I wonder if there's any truth in this?
Tony Attwood is my hero. If it weren't for his book, I'd have never had the courage to stand up for my son, insist I was right and the rest of the world wrong, about him being "not quite the same" as other kids. And guess what, my Aspie son's name is Jordan and he is a first born (also quite common for Aspies.) Yes, his name was chosen before birth...

Hello, I'm Lisa and I have a 16 yo son with Asperger's. He was officially dx'd in the 5th grade, only because I spent my own money and took him down to UCLA. He has been almost totally mainstreamed throughout school, and will be a senior next year. His grades are not the best, especially in History and English, where he must regurgitate things he's read in long passages, but he aces Drafting and has perfect pitch and plays the violin by ear. He is an absolutely wonderful kid! I was extremely fortunate that he is not ADHD and never had meltdowns of any significance. He does, however tune you out when stressed, and gets very forgetful and still, upset with the slightest change. He has a big heart, and is fully aware of his weaknesses, constantly striving to do the right thing and act the "right" way. Since about 8th grade he finally has his own friends who really are "friends" as we neurotypicals define it. Jordan is very fortunate to have my other son Landen (NT) so close in age (almost 15 now) to unwittingly teach and guide him. I am long divorced from his father, but my ex is equally supportive in Jordan's dx.

Current obsessions: ice skating, roller coasters, iTunes, U2 (the band), chatting on MySpace

Now the really weird part. My second husband (married now 5 years but dated over 6.5 before marriage), who is no blood relation to my son, I firmly believe is also Asperger's. He has not been officially dx'd, nor does he see the point in finding out, LOL! My DH, now that he has learned all about AS because of my son, also firmly believes he is an Aspie. I could type on for an hour telling you all about his eccentricities, but I won't bore you now! He is much harder to deal with, in a lot of ways, than my son is, mostly just being stubburn in his ways and hating to socialize. He is a hard worker and is extremely intelligent-- has an IQ of about 140 and holds a professional occupation. I love him very much, and I now believe that I had a better time understanding and accepting him (because he is so different) because of my son, although I did not come to this conclusion until fairly recently. We have two daughters together, and I believe my 4 yo Alexandra probably is also an Aspie. She is more social than Jordan ever was, but she has MANY AS traits, like lining things up, hoarding toys, rocking, collecting (buttons, ribbons, tiny confettis she finds in department stores, etc.) My baby Juliana who is now 2.5, seems pretty NT like her brother Landen.

Thank you and kudos for starting this thread! I have tried to join other Aspie/Autism groups, but I never really felt I fit in. Anyone out there have an Aspie spouse? And I so agree with Tony Attwood about the AS/HFA issue!
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:21 PM   #70
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Lisa,
My spouse isn't an Aspie. but I suspect my dad is on the spectrum. He's got a lot of quirks, and he is not at all social. My grandma says he barely spoke as a child. He is still fairly quiet, but will go on for hours about his interests even when no one wants to listen anymore.
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:30 PM   #71
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Hi, Lisa and welcome. My first hubby may have been, actually our social worker thought he may actually have schizophrenia. He refused to see anyone she mentioned there are a few different types, his would be mild leaving him to be able to function, unless you really knew him.
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Old 06-28-2006, 10:45 PM   #72
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- he's got the AS that thinks everyone wants to listen to him and loves him to bits! Anyone else have the confident sort? The child that cannot imagine that you don't want to listen to a 3 hour verbal on how the wheels on a low loader lorry are doubled up etc yawn yawn! You can't even call them a conversation, 'cos you're not supposed to have an answer!
Yup, mine is one of those. My ped. used to ask at each visit "on a scale of 1 to 10, where is his self-esteem?" I always put it at 10. He's had so many long "conversations" where he doesn't even care if people are listening that I don't listen most of the time. I even have it in his service plan about him being egocentric. Most people will say "All kids are that way". I say, "Not THIS egocentric!" And yet he is very tender-hearted (but he has a way of turning it back to him).
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Old 06-28-2006, 11:03 PM   #73
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StampinMamaTo4
Tony Attwood is my hero. If it weren't for his book, I'd have never had the courage to stand up for my son, insist I was right and the rest of the world wrong, about him being "not quite the same" as other kids. And guess what, my Aspie son's name is Jordan and he is a first born (also quite common for Aspies.) Yes, his name was chosen before birth...

Hello, I'm Lisa and I have a 16 yo son with Asperger's. He was officially dx'd in the 5th grade, only because I spent my own money and took him down to UCLA. He has been almost totally mainstreamed throughout school, and will be a senior next year. His grades are not the best, especially in History and English, where he must regurgitate things he's read in long passages, but he aces Drafting and has perfect pitch and plays the violin by ear. He is an absolutely wonderful kid! I was extremely fortunate that he is not ADHD and never had meltdowns of any significance. He does, however tune you out when stressed, and gets very forgetful and still, upset with the slightest change. He has a big heart, and is fully aware of his weaknesses, constantly striving to do the right thing and act the "right" way. Since about 8th grade he finally has his own friends who really are "friends" as we neurotypicals define it. Jordan is very fortunate to have my other son Landen (NT) so close in age (almost 15 now) to unwittingly teach and guide him. I am long divorced from his father, but my ex is equally supportive in Jordan's dx.

Current obsessions: ice skating, roller coasters, iTunes, U2 (the band), chatting on MySpace

Now the really weird part. My second husband (married now 5 years but dated over 6.5 before marriage), who is no blood relation to my son, I firmly believe is also Asperger's. He has not been officially dx'd, nor does he see the point in finding out, LOL! My DH, now that he has learned all about AS because of my son, also firmly believes he is an Aspie. I could type on for an hour telling you all about his eccentricities, but I won't bore you now! He is much harder to deal with, in a lot of ways, than my son is, mostly just being stubburn in his ways and hating to socialize. He is a hard worker and is extremely intelligent-- has an IQ of about 140 and holds a professional occupation. I love him very much, and I now believe that I had a better time understanding and accepting him (because he is so different) because of my son, although I did not come to this conclusion until fairly recently. We have two daughters together, and I believe my 4 yo Alexandra probably is also an Aspie. She is more social than Jordan ever was, but she has MANY AS traits, like lining things up, hoarding toys, rocking, collecting (buttons, ribbons, tiny confettis she finds in department stores, etc.) My baby Juliana who is now 2.5, seems pretty NT like her brother Landen.

Thank you and kudos for starting this thread! I have tried to join other Aspie/Autism groups, but I never really felt I fit in. Anyone out there have an Aspie spouse? And I so agree with Tony Attwood about the AS/HFA issue!

I so agree with you - my DH is way up there on the spectrum - just never realised it! Now even he says he is Aspie - trouble is - he sometimes uses it as an excuse for not doing stuff - I think its his age too! Down side is that his (DH) parents will not accept that J has it and his cousins are showing signs and both sons are 'eccentric' - that would be seen as a weakness and we don't have any weaknesses in HIS family - must be mine and my SIL genes! My mum is so accepting and reads about and helps and his are a pain - we haven't spoken to them in over 2 years because they will not adapt for J and I'm not willing to let my little one go into a war zone with them and have them shouting (particularly MIL) at him as he has a meltdown or they don't do things his way!
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Old 06-28-2006, 11:05 PM   #74
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Quote:
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Hi, Lori! Welcome. It's nice to hear of someone else with girls almost everyone I have met has boys. Your oldest and My oldest sound like they started life out the same way, Stephanie cried and cried didn't eat or sleep much, she seemed to talk on schedule though and she was early to walk 7 months old ran by 8 months old. She has mellowed a lot over the years. Both my girls have entered puberty both are now wearing bras fulltime and I don't think it will be long before they get a monthly visitor. I am very scared at how they will handle the change.
Kelly - if this is any help - the school I work in has a whole ASD unit with about 40 kids all 11 - 16. The girls all do cope - some may not like the changes, but they do cope - we have to give gentle reminders to be clean! but other than that it's OK - hope that helps!
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Old 06-29-2006, 05:17 AM   #75
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That does help Fiona thank you.
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Old 06-29-2006, 05:34 AM   #76
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StampinMamaTo4
Tony Attwood is my hero. If it weren't for his book, I'd have never had the courage to stand up for my son, insist I was right and the rest of the world wrong, about him being "not quite the same" as other kids. And guess what, my Aspie son's name is Jordan and he is a first born (also quite common for Aspies.) Yes, his name was chosen before birth...

Hello, I'm Lisa and I have a 16 yo son with Asperger's. He was officially dx'd in the 5th grade, only because I spent my own money and took him down to UCLA. He has been almost totally mainstreamed throughout school, and will be a senior next year. His grades are not the best, especially in History and English, where he must regurgitate things he's read in long passages, but he aces Drafting and has perfect pitch and plays the violin by ear. He is an absolutely wonderful kid! I was extremely fortunate that he is not ADHD and never had meltdowns of any significance. He does, however tune you out when stressed, and gets very forgetful and still, upset with the slightest change. He has a big heart, and is fully aware of his weaknesses, constantly striving to do the right thing and act the "right" way. Since about 8th grade he finally has his own friends who really are "friends" as we neurotypicals define it. Jordan is very fortunate to have my other son Landen (NT) so close in age (almost 15 now) to unwittingly teach and guide him. I am long divorced from his father, but my ex is equally supportive in Jordan's dx.

Current obsessions: ice skating, roller coasters, iTunes, U2 (the band), chatting on MySpace

Now the really weird part. My second husband (married now 5 years but dated over 6.5 before marriage), who is no blood relation to my son, I firmly believe is also Asperger's. He has not been officially dx'd, nor does he see the point in finding out, LOL! My DH, now that he has learned all about AS because of my son, also firmly believes he is an Aspie. I could type on for an hour telling you all about his eccentricities, but I won't bore you now! He is much harder to deal with, in a lot of ways, than my son is, mostly just being stubburn in his ways and hating to socialize. He is a hard worker and is extremely intelligent-- has an IQ of about 140 and holds a professional occupation. I love him very much, and I now believe that I had a better time understanding and accepting him (because he is so different) because of my son, although I did not come to this conclusion until fairly recently. We have two daughters together, and I believe my 4 yo Alexandra probably is also an Aspie. She is more social than Jordan ever was, but she has MANY AS traits, like lining things up, hoarding toys, rocking, collecting (buttons, ribbons, tiny confettis she finds in department stores, etc.) My baby Juliana who is now 2.5, seems pretty NT like her brother Landen.

Thank you and kudos for starting this thread! I have tried to join other Aspie/Autism groups, but I never really felt I fit in. Anyone out there have an Aspie spouse? And I so agree with Tony Attwood about the AS/HFA issue!

oh my goodness!! I started laughing when I read your post. Yes My DH and I both now believe he is An Aspie as well. After learning so much about it for the kids he is the first one to say "that sounds just like me!" He is very unsocial, but is such a hard worker. I tell him that I think work and school are his obsessions. He also must always tell me what year a movie was made when we watch an older one....and always comment on I can't believe it's been x amount of years since that came out.....EVERY time!! He has weird obsessions with Bee's for the last couple of years. We now know everything there is to know about bee keeping and honey ect... and have never actually done it, just know all about it. And if he is obsessed with a certain actor, we must own every movie they have ever made, even the dumb ones. Glad to know others have Aspie kids AND spouses!
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Old 06-29-2006, 05:48 AM   #77
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My kids are all still sleeping!! I think I will just start with one at a time...
Teegan is my first baby. He has always been such a great kid. He seemed smart from very early. I remember at least 3 seperate times when he was a baby when strangers would comment to me about how he was concentrating so much and how they had never seen a baby seem so focused on them like they were memorizing everything. He is still like that. He remembers everything (except the ABC's that seems to be a hard concept for him). He is a sweet tender spirit and wants to be everyones friend, but doesn't always understand when total strangers don't want to play with him. He never had meltdowns or tantrums of any kind. He is just the opposite, he tries so hard not to cry. You know his heart is really breaking when you see his lip start to quiver and he tries to rub any tears away and act like he is just fine. He has lots of sensory issues. We have never taken our kids to a movie , because they are dark and loud and he can't handle either of those. He has a hard time falling asleep. I used to get so mad at him for not staying in bed at night, when he was about 3 years old and he had been in so much trouble for not going to bed he started crying one night and actually told me that he didn't know how to go to sleep! Poor thing, I feel so bad now because I know he really doesn't know how. We are just learning about Aspergers since January. We do some brushing/joint pressure therapy every 2 hours and that has helped him fall asleep on his own now. He still has to sleep with us every night. He still wears pullups to bed.
He loves dinasours and anything that seem science related. I always find him mixing things in the kitchen to experiment. He discovered that tobasco sauce and backing soda makes a great volcano.
He is distracted by everything around him and can't concentrate on anything at school.
oops, baby is awake now. i ran out of time!! talk to you later!
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Old 06-29-2006, 11:41 AM   #78
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Well ladies I'll be off for the long weekend this evening, Canada Day here. I look forward to coming back and seeing all your posts. Have a great weekend ladies.
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Old 06-29-2006, 01:39 PM   #79
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Well ladies I'll be off for the long weekend this evening, Canada Day here. I look forward to coming back and seeing all your posts. Have a great weekend ladies.

Have a good weekend BTW what's Canada Day - you have to explain everything to us slow Brits! You wouldn't believe we speak the same language!
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Old 06-29-2006, 01:43 PM   #80
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Well I said I'd bore you silly - J did his reading at mass today - he had to read the Gospel acclaimation. He had so many changes to cope with - I was proud of him. He had to sit with the other readers, not his class, he had to stand on his own - the only one - everyone else was reading in groups - he had to wait for us to sing and then say his bit - his school is St Peters and it was Saint Peter and Saint Pauls day today - he had to use a mike - which he couldn't switch on - but he calmly asked the teacher to help and then beautifully and clearly he spoke - I was nearly in tears! I am sooooo proud of him - can you guess? LOL Then he sat down with the school and .......... flapped!! It must have been just about all he could take by that time!
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