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Old 01-20-2015, 06:39 AM   #1
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Default Just feeling sorry for myself

This is my first post to the forums. When I saw the "Need a Lift" thread, I felt I had found some new friends. My husband and I have been married 44 years. In August of 2011, we thought he had a sinus infection. When it didn't get better and he started walking with a limp and slurring his speech, we knew it was much more than an infection. A brain scan showed a tumor the size of a grapefruit in his brain--glio blastoma. It was successfully removed and after a few rounds of chemo and radiation, all was well for a couple of years. In the mean time, he also had prostate problems but not cancer. September of 2013 the brain tumor returned. Another successful surgery but he suffered a stroke during the procedure and is paralyzed on his left side. He has been in a nursing home since October of 2013. I still work 40 hours per week because we can't afford for me to quit. Cost of his room is $160 per day plus medications.
Here is my daily schedule:
Get up at 4 AM and start laundry. (I do his because you never know if you are going to get his clothes back if the nursing home does it even if his name is on it!!)
Shower and dress
By 6 AM, I am visiting him for about 45 minutes.
At work by 7 AM
Lunch is 11:30-12:30. Run home to get the mail and fix a meal to take to him. (Food is HORRIBLE where he is!!)
Visit for about 30 minutes.
Back to work until 4 PM.
Fix another meal.
Stay with him until 7 or 8 PM.
Home to drop in bed.

Hope I haven't broken any rules by posting a thread this long. I have no one to "unload" on. My best friend lives in Georgia and I'm in Illinois. It's just been a very hard couple of years and I'm exhausted.
Thanks for listening.
Marsha
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:34 AM   #2
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Dear Marsha, my heart goes out to you. I will hold you up in prayer. Do you have children near that could maybe help you out for one of the meals? I know it is hard but you, as the caregiver need to take care of yourself or you won't be a help to your husband. You have a grueling schedule.

I had to have a discussion with my mother's care center concerning meals also. I gave the facts of why I thought certain meals were not good for seniors and they did address those concerns. Please feel free to pm if you need to talk.
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Old 01-20-2015, 10:51 AM   #3
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Hello Marsha,

No you did broken and rules here. I will be prayer for you! If you need friend I am here for you too. I know not easy, for handicapped and mom has cancer too. And is my care take too. So, I understand that somewhat. If you go to church the church should be able to help you with meals and etc. Hugs Hotwheels Linda
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Old 01-20-2015, 12:58 PM   #4
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Thank you both very much for your kind words. Sometimes I feel that I just can't go on anymore. I have 2 adult children--one is a divorced mother of 2 who lives about an hour away. She is holding down two jobs so I don't feel I can ask her for help. The other one is a son who works 45 hours a week---3PM-2AM and then 5 extra hours on the weekend. And trust me, I wouldn't ask him to help with meals!!! He would bring McDonald's 7 days a week!! As for the church, I am very discouraged by them lately. Last year there was another lady from our church right next door to my husband. I can't tell you how many people came to visit her and would stop and see David on their way out. She went home after about 3 months (good for her!!) and NOT ONE person has been back in that whole time to see David. And it's not like we're not good members. He was an elder for many years and I was secretary of the congregation for 5 years and on various boards for several years. Guess that doesn't matter, tho.
Thanks again for your replies. I appreciate them very much,
Marsha
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Old 01-20-2015, 01:03 PM   #5
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Marsha - I will be praying for you and your husband as well. It is so hard when the church lets you down. My parents are dealing with that right now themselves. Do you have a good friend at church that you could bring this up? Just flat out ask? I know my parents won't do that. Yet they were the ones who were always running people places, sending cards, making meals, etc. Bring it to their attention and that might help. SCS is a great community - not just for cardmaking but for support. It's a shame we all don't live closer together!
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Old 01-20-2015, 02:28 PM   #6
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Hey Marsha - welcome to Splitcoast! You will find friends and encouragement here. You are definitely in my prayers - that caregiver role - exhausting doesn't even begin to describe it. Big hugs to you. Let me know if I can help you with anything on the site!!
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Old 01-24-2015, 09:00 AM   #7
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Dearest Marsha, please know you have caring friends here. What you are going through is not an easy road to travel.

Sending you much loving support, encouragement and prayers.
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Old 01-26-2015, 06:07 AM   #8
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Again, thanks for your support. I cherish each one of my new "friends" here. It's nice to know I can come here and have you all share in my pity party!
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Old 02-15-2015, 12:26 PM   #9
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Just checking in Marsha, I wanted to ask how you're doing. You're such a trooper to keep up a schedule like that, but we do pretty much anything for the ones we love, don't we?!

I know it's difficult to ask for help, especially for the older generation. I'm only in my early 40s and I find it really tough because I've always been the 'fixer'. Oldest of 8 kids, you see. That being said, are there other community groups you can reach out to? I'm always amazed at the great variety of organizations in my community. It's tougher when you're in a small place, but if your town has a Community Services organization, reach out to them even if just for them to help point you in the right direction. I had to fight hard to get help for my mom when she needed it, but after many phone calls, emails and conversations, I was able to get community help for someone to come in once a week to help her bathe, at no charge. Any little bit helps. Granted, I'm in Canada and things are a little different here, but I hope there are resources in your area that you can tap into.

Sending happy thoughts your way!
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Old 02-15-2015, 10:08 PM   #10
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Oh Marsha, I'm so sorry to hear about your DH. It's heartbreaking to hear your soulmates health is declining, and the stress that comes with any job is overwhelming. My DH is total care, I've been caring for him at home, luckily I was able to retire. I tried to work past retirement, but couldn't manage working without sleep any longer. I know your nights are often sleepless too, and I wish you had someone close by to help and talk to. My DH is in the hospital right now, he is 3-days post below the knee amputation. I'd just love to give you a big HUG, and remind you there is always someone to talk to here. I will be praying for you and your honey. Don't forget you have to stay healthy too! You can PM me anytime, I'm usually here every couple of hours.
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Old 02-17-2015, 05:45 AM   #11
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Thanks, Annecards. I have been hanging in there. Had the flu last week for a couple of days. Missed 2 days of work. Hadn't missed work for any sickness for me personally for about 15 years. David has an MRI this Thursday so we are hoping for good news. He has an MRI every 3 months just to keep an eye on things. He has been "clear" since his last surgery in September of 2013. I so wish I could get him home but without a total remodel of my house, I don't see that happening.
Thanks again for your kind words. I will let you all know about the MRI.
Marsha
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Old 02-17-2015, 06:20 AM   #12
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Coming by to leave many hugs, lots of love, encouragement and prayers.
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Old 02-17-2015, 06:39 AM   #13
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Originally Posted by grandmamarsha View Post
Thanks, Annecards. I have been hanging in there. Had the flu last week for a couple of days. Missed 2 days of work. Hadn't missed work for any sickness for me personally for about 15 years. David has an MRI this Thursday so we are hoping for good news. He has an MRI every 3 months just to keep an eye on things. He has been "clear" since his last surgery in September of 2013. I so wish I could get him home but without a total remodel of my house, I don't see that happening.
Thanks again for your kind words. I will let you all know about the MRI.
Marsha
Yes, please keep us posted. I'll be praying for your honey & you. I totally understand not everyone is able to care for their loved one at home. I will tell anyone, it's not easy. One does have to have a home that can be adapted to equipment. And, even with equipment it's not easy if your loved one is dependent on transfers and activities of daily living. Although my honey is totally dependent, my house is adaptable, I'm strong and able to transfer him, and I'm retired. I retired from the medical profession, a RN for 40, makes caring for him at home easier I'm sure. Everyone has to do what is best for them. Then, there's the financial factor to figure in.

There's one thing you cannot afford to neglect, you! If you get sick who's going to take care of you? Who's going to make sure your honey is getting good care, by making sure the staff is doing their job? Who's going to pay the bills? You must plan time for you. I have my dear friend stay with my honey while I go for a massage once a month.

I'm here for you. We will all get through this together.

HUGS
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Old 02-17-2015, 12:02 PM   #14
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I know I need to take care of myself but it's hard. I feel so guilty if I leave him even for an hour to get my hair or nails done. Our daughter has invited me to go to the Mall of America with her for 4 days towards the end of March. I really would like to go (especially since she WON the trip and our only expense will be getting there!) but I feel like I shouldn't spend time and money on myself. A month or so ago I spent the night at my daughter's house which is about an hour away. He called me 8 times between 10 PM and 5 AM. I finally just came on home. MOA is about 7 hours from here so it won't be as easy just to pack up and leave if he should get nervous or upset. What I would REALLY like to do is to TELL him I'm going but just stay home and clean and rest and do whatever I want. How selfish is that????
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Old 02-17-2015, 02:27 PM   #15
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I know I need to take care of myself but it's hard. I feel so guilty if I leave him even for an hour to get my hair or nails done. Our daughter has invited me to go to the Mall of America with her for 4 days towards the end of March. I really would like to go (especially since she WON the trip and our only expense will be getting there!) but I feel like I shouldn't spend time and money on myself. A month or so ago I spent the night at my daughter's house which is about an hour away. He called me 8 times between 10 PM and 5 AM. I finally just came on home. MOA is about 7 hours from here so it won't be as easy just to pack up and leave if he should get nervous or upset. What I would REALLY like to do is to TELL him I'm going but just stay home and clean and rest and do whatever I want. How selfish is that????
That's not being selfish at all. You are going to have to take some time, or you are going to crash! I'm lucky to be home with my DH, because I can manage to steal a little time to work on a card here and there. He just had another surgery this last Friday, amputation just below the knee, but my Son is coming in for the weekend so I'll be able to get out for a few hours. He won't change him, so I'll have to scurry right home if he has an accident other than urine. Still, it will be good to have my Son here for a couple of days. My daughter is coming in April, she's a RN, so I can get away for more than a couple of hours. I am blessed to have loving & caring kids, I wish they didn't live so far away.

Sorry, getting back to you. Is it possible to take at least one or two days off, and forward all calls to your daughter? You can always call your daughter directly to check on how it's going. You're going to have to take time or you will, I promise, crash! I've seen it happen.

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Old 03-09-2015, 03:09 PM   #16
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God Bless you! Love to you and your husband. I will pray for your strength to cope.
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Old 03-10-2015, 10:20 AM   #17
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Thanks again for your prayers and encouragement. His latest MRI came back clear again---thank God! I don't know if there are any medical people on this board but I have a question. Every time (and I mean EVERY TIME) he has an MRI, he gets a UTI. They have to use the contrast dye since it's a test of the brain. I mentioned this to the nurses at the care facility and they didn't especially want to believe me. He has an MRI every 3 months so I told them to check his records--I even told them what months to check. Lo and behold---I'm not as dumb as they think I am!! They have forwarded the info to the doctor so we are just awaiting his response. Has anyone else ever had this problem? They also just did an ultra sound of his kidneys and bladder just to make sure there were no problems there and they also came back clear. He told me over the weekend that he's ready to give up--that he has no willpower left. I can understand that. The first surgery was about 3.5 years ago and he's been in the nursing home for about 1.5 years. I think I would have given up long ago. To say he is my hero is putting it mildly. I love him to the moon and back.
Thanks for reading this far. I know it's long. Sometimes I get "wordy"!!!
Marsha
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Old 03-10-2015, 11:17 AM   #18
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Thanks again for your prayers and encouragement. His latest MRI came back clear again---thank God! I don't know if there are any medical people on this board but I have a question. Every time (and I mean EVERY TIME) he has an MRI, he gets a UTI. They have to use the contrast dye since it's a test of the brain. I mentioned this to the nurses at the care facility and they didn't especially want to believe me. He has an MRI every 3 months so I told them to check his records--I even told them what months to check. Lo and behold---I'm not as dumb as they think I am!! They have forwarded the info to the doctor so we are just awaiting his response. Has anyone else ever had this problem? They also just did an ultra sound of his kidneys and bladder just to make sure there were no problems there and they also came back clear. He told me over the weekend that he's ready to give up--that he has no willpower left. I can understand that. The first surgery was about 3.5 years ago and he's been in the nursing home for about 1.5 years. I think I would have given up long ago. To say he is my hero is putting it mildly. I love him to the moon and back.
Thanks for reading this far. I know it's long. Sometimes I get "wordy"!!!
Marsha
I'm a RN. 40 years and just retired last year. The contrast used for MIRs is excreated through the kidneys. If he's experiencing burning it could be the contrast and not an actual infection. If he has prostrate problems he may not be fully emptying his bladder and this can often result in chronic bladder infections. There's no way to know without a urinalysis. If his urine is milky he may have a yeast infection requiring an antifungal medication and not antibiotics. I'd call and make an appointment with his doctor, or see if the doctor will give an order for an urinalysis.
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Old 03-10-2015, 12:09 PM   #19
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He says he never experiences burning and there isn't any pain of any sort. The doctor does urinalysis each time and they always determine it's a UTI. Urine has never been milky colored---just dark. He has had 2 prostate surgeries to reduce the size but they have deemed him "cured" on that part.
Thanks for your response. Hope I'm not getting too graphic!!
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Old 03-10-2015, 12:37 PM   #20
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Hi Marsha - glad to know the scans came back clear. That is very good news.

Have you decided to go with your daughter? I really think you should go. You need the break and some time to enjoy yourself. I know it is probably a hard choice, but I think more caregivers need to do this for themselves.
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Old 03-10-2015, 12:48 PM   #21
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I know I need to take care of myself but it's hard. I feel so guilty if I leave him even for an hour to get my hair or nails done. Our daughter has invited me to go to the Mall of America with her for 4 days towards the end of March. I really would like to go (especially since she WON the trip and our only expense will be getting there!) but I feel like I shouldn't spend time and money on myself. A month or so ago I spent the night at my daughter's house which is about an hour away. He called me 8 times between 10 PM and 5 AM. I finally just came on home. MOA is about 7 hours from here so it won't be as easy just to pack up and leave if he should get nervous or upset. What I would REALLY like to do is to TELL him I'm going but just stay home and clean and rest and do whatever I want. How selfish is that????
Marsha, my heart goes out to you. My husband died of a brain tumor so I know what you are going through. I went out of town for a few days the weekend before he went into the hospital for the last time. Talk about guilt! That being said, you MUST take care of yourself. See if you can make and bring several lunches to the facility so you don't have to do that every day. The mail can wait. Tell him you will visit on Sunday, Tuesday, Thursday and Saturday and that you need time for yourself or you won't have the strength to take care of him. This is especially true if he has a good prognosis (i.e. he is expected to live for an extended period of time). There are caregiver support groups on line. They will all tell you the same thing - you have to take care of YOU.
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Old 03-10-2015, 03:41 PM   #22
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Grandmamarsha,

My husband passed away after an eighteen month battle with glioblastoma on September 17, 2013--ten days before our 35th wedding anniversary. I would give anything to have him back. You are fortunate to have your husband still with you as most GBM patients do not survive long after diagnosis.

The work is hard--it's worth it.
The exhaustion is, well, exhausting--it's worth it.
The heartache is unbearable but nothing to compare to after they're gone.

Do take time for yourself. Take it in small increments rather than large segments. I say this because you already feel guilty when you take an hour. Even seventeen months after my darling left this world, I still think of things I should have done for him and feel guilty because I didn't do them.

I didn't do them because I was too caught up in keeping him clean, fixing him nutritious, fiber-filled,enticing meals that half the time he couldn't eat, getting his meds on time, reordering medications, checking his urine output, stressing about the bills, readjusting him to prevent bed sores on top of the regular chores (both mine and his) around the house.

Enough rehashing my own pity party. Let's make you a new, easier schedule.

Stop getting up at 4AM.
Start doing the laundry one day a week. Toss a load into the washer anytime you are at home.

Take a weekend chunk of time to make a couple casseroles and a pot of soup. Divide those meals into single portions and freeze at least half of them. Keep the other half in the fridge for daily consumption. Take two meals per day with you to work and store in workplace fridge. If they don't have a fridge, use a cooler. When you visit at lunch and at the end of the day, take the meal with you. No more trips home to pick up the mail (it will be waiting when you get home in the evening) or preparing a meal. You'll be saving time, gas and energy.

After visiting in the evening, you'll have enough energy to go home and take a bubble bath.

As for those things I wish I had done? My husband loved to be rubbed--feet, head, tummy, arms, back--it didn't matter. He loved it all and I failed to give him one single massage the entire time he was under hospice care. I don't know if I can ever forgive myself that.

I'm going to ask you to do me one favor. Please give your husband a kiss from me--and rub his tummy (if he likes that) for me.

Be kind. Not just to him, but to yourself.

Almost forgot, there is an online support group for brain tumor patients and caregivers over at http://www.inspire.com/
Lots of good advice, excellent news articles, discussion about various treatments, etc.

Hugs,

Rainsong
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Old 03-10-2015, 03:47 PM   #23
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Dearest Marsha - I hope you will be able to either get away for a few days with your daughter or as you have said, just take a much needed break quietly at home. Know in your heart that your DH will be OK and taken care of by skilled people who know you both. It's like an extension of your family and you need to trust that others can lift some of your burden and he will be OK. If he prefers your cooking to the nursing home fare, perhaps you could make a few meals, label and refrigerate at the home for an aide to heat for him. With enough notice and the reason, I can't imagine that they couldn't accommodate the occasional needs of a loved one. My own mom has been in a nursing home for several years and the staff helps as much as possible. As for constant phone calls, hopefully if you explain your need for a short break, your husband will understand that if you fall apart he could lose you for more than a couple of days. There shouldn't be any guilt on your part and I agree that maybe phone calls could be forwarded to a family member. Bless you for all that you are doing and taking care of yourself is part of that responsibility. Have a peaceful evening - keep us posted.
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Old 03-17-2015, 12:22 PM   #24
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Rainsong--I don't know what to say. My heart goes out to you on your loss. I know the pain will be unbearable when the time comes. With God's help, I will get through it.
I like a lot of your ideas and will try to work on a couple of them. I honestly don't know WHY I get up at 4 AM--I'm just a morning person, I guess. I like the quiet that time of day and I really can get a lot done. Maybe that's when I could make that casserole or pot of soup.
I know what you mean about the massages. David likes those also. But I get upset when he wants me to give him one because I'm tired after working all day and I just want to sit and rest. I SHOULD NOT FEEL THAT WAY!!! I do end up giving him the massage but I always feel like he's invading my time. Now THAT is selfish.
On a good note---(2 of them actually!) I have decided on a retirement date. It's a little over 2 years away but if we give a 2 year notice, we get our regular raise for that year plus an additional 2% raise. I won't retire until around Christmas of 2017 but I can finally see the light at the end of this long tunnel.
The other good thing--my boss's son was selling raffle tickets for a 50/50 drawing. I bought mine right after the holidays and had forgotten all about it. They called me Sunday night and told me I won $420!!! How cool is that? And, yes, I think I have decided that I am definitely going the Mall of America with my daughter and grandkids next week. My husband told me to spend all $420 on myself. And you know what, I think I'm going to!
Thank you all for being there.
Marsha
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Old 03-17-2015, 06:19 PM   #25
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Marsha, I'm so happy to hear that you're going to take some 'me' time! When you spend the money, try not to be too thrifty! If you're anything like me, I try to figure out how I can maximize the money I'm going to spend. Which of course is a good way to be, but sometimes you just need to splurge. Go for a manicure, or a pedicure if you like those, or heck why not both?! Think of something you like but that you would never spend the money on, and just do it.

Rainsong has such excellent suggestions, I hope you're able to make some of them work for you. I know it's easier said than done, but you can do it!

Please continue to check in with us and let us know how you're doing... we especially want to know how you spend your money, and we want to hear all about your trip to the Mall of America!
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Old 03-17-2015, 06:19 PM   #26
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I'm so sorry to read you are having so many problems Marsha. I agree with everyone else though, you also need to take care of yourself...or you won't be able to take care of him. I pray you can figure out a schedule that allows for this, and allows you to not be so tired when you are with him so you can do those little things he loves...that will ease your heart and mind once he's gone. Hang in there! Even if your church has abandoned you, God hasn't.

Hugs,
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Old 03-18-2015, 12:03 PM   #27
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Marsha- I pray that God holds you and your husband in His tender loving arms. Please take care of yourself.
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Old 03-30-2015, 07:16 AM   #28
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Marsha, you and your husband might find this of interest. 60 Minutes Video - With the polio trial's early success the team raised the dose in hope of an even better result. But that's when the polio trial encountered its first tragedies - CBS.com

It's about a clinical trial at Duke. Immunotherapy using polio virus injected into the tumor has caused glioblastoma tumors to collapse into themselves and disappear. I wish this had been available for my husband.

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Old 03-30-2015, 11:33 AM   #29
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Sending prayers your way. You are one strong woman.
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Old 03-30-2015, 11:48 AM   #30
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Thanks, Ruthie. I don't feel very strong. I did not get to go on my trip to the Mall of America with my daughter and grandkids. He had such a panic or anxiety attack on the day before I was to leave that I thought I was going to have to take him to the hospital to get him drugged or something. Almost as soon as I told him I wasn't going, he calmed down. He told me I should go ahead and go but if something would have happened to him while I was gone I would never have forgiven myself. Do I feel cheated? You bet! I even found myself being angry with him for getting sick in the first place. That's not fair to him--he didn't want to get a stupid brain tumor. My whole week's vacation was spent at the nursing home for 8-12 hours a day.
I'm sorry for all the whining. I just have no one else to talk to.
Thanks for listening,
Marsha
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Old 03-30-2015, 03:10 PM   #31
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Rainsong, I saw that episode on 60 minutes! Amazing and the new things taking place today.
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Old 04-29-2015, 11:56 PM   #32
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Marsha,
how are you today?
I just want to let you know that I think you are great!
Is there still no help for you?
I feel so sad about! Why don't I live next to your door?
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Old 04-30-2015, 10:30 AM   #33
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Thank you for thinking I'm "great". That really brightened my day!!
Haven't found any additional help yet but we are still looking. My daughter is an elementary school secretary and will be off in a few weeks for the summer. Maybe she can help out a little more.
I wish you lived next door too! There's a house for sale in my neighborhood---not exactly next door but less than half a block away. AND it has an in-ground swimming pool!!
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Old 07-05-2015, 08:10 PM   #34
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Just reading up on all of this and my prayers are with you all
God bless and if you need an ear to talk to email me
Good luck and thank goodness for threads like these to have people care for you even if its just through emails

Quote:
Originally Posted by Rainsong View Post
Grandmamarsha,

My husband passed away after an eighteen month battle with glioblastoma on September 17, 2013--ten days before our 35th wedding anniversary. I would give anything to have him back. You are fortunate to have your husband still with you as most GBM patients do not survive long after diagnosis.

The work is hard--it's worth it.
The exhaustion is, well, exhausting--it's worth it.
The heartache is unbearable but nothing to compare to after they're gone.

Do take time for yourself. Take it in small increments rather than large segments. I say this because you already feel guilty when you take an hour. Even seventeen months after my darling left this world, I still think of things I should have done for him and feel guilty because I didn't do them.

I didn't do them because I was too caught up in keeping him clean, fixing him nutritious, fiber-filled,enticing meals that half the time he couldn't eat, getting his meds on time, reordering medications, checking his urine output, stressing about the bills, readjusting him to prevent bed sores on top of the regular chores (both mine and his) around the house.

Enough rehashing my own pity party. Let's make you a new, easier schedule.

Stop getting up at 4AM.
Start doing the laundry one day a week. Toss a load into the washer anytime you are at home.

Take a weekend chunk of time to make a couple casseroles and a pot of soup. Divide those meals into single portions and freeze at least half of them. Keep the other half in the fridge for daily consumption. Take two meals per day with you to work and store in workplace fridge. If they don't have a fridge, use a cooler. When you visit at lunch and at the end of the day, take the meal with you. No more trips home to pick up the mail (it will be waiting when you get home in the evening) or preparing a meal. You'll be saving time, gas and energy.

After visiting in the evening, you'll have enough energy to go home and take a bubble bath.

As for those things I wish I had done? My husband loved to be rubbed--feet, head, tummy, arms, back--it didn't matter. He loved it all and I failed to give him one single massage the entire time he was under hospice care. I don't know if I can ever forgive myself that.

I'm going to ask you to do me one favor. Please give your husband a kiss from me--and rub his tummy (if he likes that) for me.

Be kind. Not just to him, but to yourself.

Almost forgot, there is an online support group for brain tumor patients and caregivers over at http://www.inspire.com/
Lots of good advice, excellent news articles, discussion about various treatments, etc.

Hugs,

Rainsong
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Old 08-21-2015, 08:52 AM   #35
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Quote:
Originally Posted by grandmamarsha View Post
Thanks, Ruthie. I don't feel very strong. I did not get to go on my trip to the Mall of America with my daughter and grandkids. He had such a panic or anxiety attack on the day before I was to leave that I thought I was going to have to take him to the hospital to get him drugged or something. Almost as soon as I told him I wasn't going, he calmed down. He told me I should go ahead and go but if something would have happened to him while I was gone I would never have forgiven myself. Do I feel cheated? You bet! I even found myself being angry with him for getting sick in the first place. That's not fair to him--he didn't want to get a stupid brain tumor. My whole week's vacation was spent at the nursing home for 8-12 hours a day.
I'm sorry for all the whining. I just have no one else to talk to.
Thanks for listening,
Marsha
Is is possible for him to get some counselling, so that he can perhaps deal with his anxiety issues? It might help him to talk it out with a professional. Maybe even a joint counselling session with you, so you could both vent. I don't know if there are therapists available where he is, but there must be someone who does counselling that could do it in house.
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