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Old 05-25-2007, 02:29 PM   #81
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I got this saying from a different thread and used Oh so sweet (chocolate covered cherries and strawberries, chocolate chips)


Now that food has replaced my sex life, even I can't get into my pants.
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Old 05-25-2007, 02:35 PM   #82
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Kathy, thanks for finding this for us! I've got a list somewhere, I'll try to find it and see if there's anything on it that isn't already here.
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Old 05-25-2007, 02:36 PM   #83
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Quote:
Originally Posted by victorial View Post
I got this saying from a different thread and used Oh so sweet (chocolate covered cherries and strawberries, chocolate chips)


Now that food has replaced my sex life, even I can't get into my pants.
Too hilarious!
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Old 05-25-2007, 03:22 PM   #84
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hmmmmm I feel a 'quirky' swap going on!!

I was actually thinking of this yesterday in my car while I was driving to the hospital.

What fun it would be to have a sarcastic swap, or quirky, or just something out of the ordinary.

Any volunteers to host? teehee

I'd volunteer, but I'm moving in 4 weeks and just don't have the time to dedicate to it. However, if no one steps up to the plate by the end of June then I will gladly host a swap of this nature. I think it would be a load of fun!

OK, c'mon, tell me I'm brilliant for thinking this up LOL
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Old 05-25-2007, 04:06 PM   #85
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Just found this. Laughed so hard. Subscribing so I don't lose it.
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Old 05-25-2007, 05:41 PM   #86
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For Birthday: You know your getting old when your pet can't stand to see you naked any more.

For Friends: Another great thing about small towns. Kinda chunky girls can win the beauty pageant.

For Graduation: You know your out of college when your salary is less than your tuition.

Encouragement: Never take life seriously. No one gets out alive anyway.

Of course I would never use these! LOL
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Old 05-25-2007, 06:38 PM   #87
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Oh my goodness! These are sooooooo funny!

I have my thinking cap on now.
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Old 05-25-2007, 07:43 PM   #88
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Quote:
Originally Posted by jeaniebean55 View Post
Kathy, thanks for finding this for us! I've got a list somewhere, I'll try to find it and see if there's anything on it that isn't already here.


I just couldn't believe that the little box next to the thread was BLACK, and it had been almost a year (6-5-06) since anyone posted to it......I thought it was very clever, and needed to "post" to make it come back up near the top of the thread forum! I know there are a lot of "fun stuff" out there! I laughed my tushy off at this thread!! I am very happy to see others have noticed it!
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Old 05-25-2007, 07:46 PM   #89
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Quote:
Originally Posted by wenchie View Post
hmmmmm I feel a 'quirky' swap going on!!

I was actually thinking of this yesterday in my car while I was driving to the hospital.

What fun it would be to have a sarcastic swap, or quirky, or just something out of the ordinary.

Any volunteers to host? teehee

I'd volunteer, but I'm moving in 4 weeks and just don't have the time to dedicate to it. However, if no one steps up to the plate by the end of June then I will gladly host a swap of this nature. I think it would be a load of fun!

OK, c'mon, tell me I'm brilliant for thinking this up LOL
WENCHIE~ YOU ARE SO BRILLIANT FOR THINKING THIS UP!!!!

will have to keep checking back to see if anyone signed on as a "hostess"!!
*shaking head NO, but I will participate
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Old 05-25-2007, 08:02 PM   #90
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These are great! I love this thread!!
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Old 05-25-2007, 08:10 PM   #91
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I've never hosted a swap before. But if someone can give me some private tutoring, I'd be happy to do it with a deadline before June 25th....How big should the swap be? Full cards or card fronts? LMK what you want and I'll compile the wishes and post to this thread on Monday!!!( Am I crazy or what?)
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Old 05-26-2007, 05:37 AM   #93
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OMG!!!! How have I missed this thread before?!!! BWHAAAHAAAA!!! I have to say, this is one aspect of store bought cards that I REALLY miss (ya know~the sugary, gooey, sweetness that is sooooooo my personality!! LOL!!)
I'll be checking in often!!
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Old 05-26-2007, 06:18 AM   #94
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OMG, those are hilarious!!! SEE you fit right in!!
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Old 05-26-2007, 06:35 AM   #95
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I was in a grumpy mood this morning cuz I have to steam clean the carpet, thanks to my dog who hates the rain and chose not to go outside! This thread has lightened my mood immensely. Anyone interested in steam cleaning for me? Thanks for the laughs.
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Old 05-26-2007, 09:13 AM   #96
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Default more quirky sayings

Here's some I just got in an email this morning

--Now that food has replaced sex in my life, I can't even get into my own pants



--Marriage changes passion.
Suddenly you're in bed with a relative.

--I saw a woman wearing a sweat shirt with "Guess" on it.
So I said "Implants?" She hit me.


--How come we choose from just two people to run for president and over fifty for MissAmerica ?

--A good friend will come and bail you out of jail..but, a true friend will be sitting next to you saying, "Wow...that was fun!"


-- I signed up for an exercise class and was told to wear loose-fitting clothing. If I HAD any loose-fitting clothing, I wouldn't have signed up in the first place!

--When I was young we used to go "skinny dipping," now I just "chunky dunk."

-- Don't argue with an idiot;
people watching may not be
able to tell the difference.

--Wouldn't it be nice if whenever we messed up our life we could simply press 'Ctrl Alt Delete' and start all over? AMEN , AMEN !!


-- Why is it that our children
can't read a Bible in school,
but they can in prison?

--Wouldn't you know it...
Brain cells come and brain cells go, but FATcells live forever


--Bumper sticker of the year:
"If you can read this, thank a teacher -and, since it's in English, thank a soldier".

Can't wait for the swap info to be posted. If I knew how to do one, I'd offer to help out. Enjoy your day!
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Old 05-26-2007, 09:32 AM   #97
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Come on now stampers! I haven't gotten any direction on what you want in this swap yet. I have decisions to make and I want it to be YOUR swap. Talk to me, please. I'm going to the gym now and will be back in about 1 1/2 hours and expect good suggestions, numbers or limits, etc. (Not really, but it would be nice!) Keep those quips coming!
Sara
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Old 05-26-2007, 01:52 PM   #98
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These are so great!!!
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Old 05-26-2007, 02:27 PM   #99
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara in WI View Post
Come on now stampers! I haven't gotten any direction on what you want in this swap yet. I have decisions to make and I want it to be YOUR swap. Talk to me, please. I'm going to the gym now and will be back in about 1 1/2 hours and expect good suggestions, numbers or limits, etc. (Not really, but it would be nice!) Keep those quips coming!
Sara
depending on how many sign up...I would put them in small groups of 8 or 10....I like doing "full" cards, but just "fronts" is ok with me too, I would also do a No Vender Restriction(NVR), oh, have them make at least one or two layers and some kind of embellishment....AM I BEEING TOO BOSSY?!?!
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Old 05-26-2007, 02:36 PM   #100
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No....you are not too bossy! I need input before posting this on Monday. It will definitely be a full card....probably a white card with at least 2 layers so that we can stamp on the inside if appropriate and No Vendor Restrictions. So that should give anyone who's ready to start thinking about this some more food for thought!
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Old 05-26-2007, 02:41 PM   #101
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I'm all over it like a fat kid on a smartie! It'll be great to see what people come up with!

I like the 'front only' full card approach.
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Old 05-26-2007, 02:45 PM   #102
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For my friends with surly teenagers:

Remember, sometimes "mother" is only half a word.
 
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Old 05-26-2007, 10:31 PM   #103
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What a fun thread! Just found it... TFS, everyone. The Ladies Who Lunch in my neighborhood (that is, those of us whose last child had started first grade, and believe me, we had dreamed of this for years!) used to go out to lunch once a month and celebrate all birthdays during that month with funny cards. Many of these were saved from those cards, because they were way too good to throw away! Others are quotes I've saved along the way.

Cake always makes another birthday easier to swallow!

It's customary to blow out the candles on your cake, but I guess you could beat them out with your cane.

It's your birthday. That makes me smile. I'm too polite to laugh.

You know you're getting old when birthday cake makes you worry about calories instead of pimples.

Happy Birthday! You've finally cornered the candle market.

Zip-a-dee-doo-dah, zip-a-dee-ay, my-oh-my, how our hair has turned gray!

As your birthday dawns and the number sinks in, remember -- sound carries. Scream into your pillow.

How does one say Happy Birthday to someove over 40? Very carefully!

You know you're over the hill, when trying to look older has lost its appeal.

You're how many?

If life's a beach, where are our cabana boys?

It's your birthday, whether you like it or not.

You know what they call it when you say you don't feel any older? B***S***.

Age is a case of mind over matter. If you don't mind, it doesn't matter.

A true friend remembers your birthday but not your age.

You’re not old! You’ve just been young for a very long time!

There is still no cure for the common birthday.
-John Glenn

Birthdays are nature's way of telling us to eat more cake.
-Unknown

Why is a birthday cake the only food you can blow on and spit on and everybody rushes to get a piece?
-Bobby Kelton

As you get older three things happen. The first is your memory goes, and I can't remember the other two...
-Sir Norman Wisdom

Birthdays are good for you. The more you have, the longer you live.
-Unknown

Aging seems to be the only available way to live a long life.
-Daniel Francois Esprit Auber

The first hundred years are the hardest.
-Wilson Mizner

Middle age is when you've met so many people that every new person you meet reminds you of someone else.
-Ogden Nash

You know you are getting old when the candles cost more than the cake.
-Bob Hope

You know you're getting old when all the names in your black book have M.D. after them.
-Arnold Palmer

Age is a number and mine is unlisted.
-Anonymous

Old age isn't so bad when you consider the alternatives.
-Maurice Chevalier

Age is something that doesn't matter, unless you are a cheese.
-Billie Burke

You're only young once, but you can be immature forever.
-John Greier

Just remember, once you're over the hill you begin to pick up speed.
-Charles M. Schultz

The secret of staying young is to live honestly, eat slowly, and lie about your age.
-Lucille Ball
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Old 05-26-2007, 10:56 PM   #104
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Subscribing - This is just too hilarious.

I love my Dad's old sayings: For birthdays -

You know you are getting old when - - the bank sends you a calendar one month at a time.

Or

you know you're getting older when - - you will your body to science and science contests the will.

Lin
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Old 05-26-2007, 11:09 PM   #105
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These are hilarious! I have a lot of new ideas for my co-workers' cards!
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Old 05-27-2007, 08:59 AM   #106
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How about...

"Congrats on your Birthday (on front)....(inside) In Dog Years You'd be Dead by Now"

Or a stamp with bunny behinds in a row "What do you call a row of bunnies hopping backwards? A receding hareline." (got the idea from Custer's Last Stamp)

Or I bought a card for my brother that had a picture of a bald guy on it and said something to the effect of "Holding in your gut all these years has blown the hair right off your head! Happy Birthday!"

Jane
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Old 05-27-2007, 10:47 AM   #107
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a few of my favs are :-
I know you hate hospitals, but at least you get breakfast in bed!

The Irish gave the bagpipes to the scots as a joke, but the scots haven't got the joke yet.

I rang the fire brigade there standing by....now you can light the candles on your CAKE!

Go bra less it pulls the wrinkles out of your face!

Man cannot live on chocolate alone,
But women can.

If you can't eat all your chocolate, it will keep in the freezer. But if you can't eat it all what's wrong with you?

Want to have fun this Easter?
forget the eggs Hide the remote control.

Give a man a fish and he has food for a day, teach him to fish and you can get rid of him for an entire weekend.
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Old 05-27-2007, 06:27 PM   #108
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This is a great quote from Gracy Allen,perfict for a moving card,..."It takes a heap of humble house to make a living home like noplace,...be it ever so."
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Old 05-27-2007, 07:55 PM   #109
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I love these - I just printed the insides for six cards! Thanks to everyone for sharing!
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Old 05-27-2007, 07:59 PM   #110
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Sneak peek of the up-coming swap:
1) 10+1
2) full white cards so that the sentiment can continue into the inside
3) Must e-mail me at: sjk@mhtc.net
4) NVR
5) at least 2 layers and 1 embellishment
6) the usual mailing recommendations to include your cards in zip-lock bags with full name and address, plus your screen-name written on the bag
7) Self-addressed mailing label with Priority postage
Cards to reach me in Wisconsin before June 25. Turn around time dependent on the number of participants but hopefully right away. I will provide the return boxes/envies.
9) When you sign up for the swap I will e-mail you my mailing address! Have fun! These should be classics!
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Old 05-27-2007, 08:04 PM   #111
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Here's a cute one:

Housework won't kill you, but why take a chance?
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Old 05-27-2007, 08:15 PM   #112
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HeHe....I don't know how I got that smilie in the above post...but there it is!

Anywaaaaay. The SWAP is POSTED! Let the fun begin! Please e-mail me at:

sjk@mhtc.net
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Old 05-27-2007, 10:29 PM   #113
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Bumping for the night owls.......
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Old 05-27-2007, 10:39 PM   #114
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subscribing ... this is great!
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Old 05-28-2007, 08:38 AM   #115
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Me too~Haven't laughed this hard since I fed my little brother to the pigs!!
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Old 05-28-2007, 06:28 PM   #116
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara in WI View Post
Sneak peek of the up-coming swap:
1) 10+1
2) full white cards so that the sentiment can continue into the inside
3) Must e-mail me at: sjk@mhtc.net
4) NVR
5) at least 2 layers and 1 embellishment
6) the usual mailing recommendations to include your cards in zip-lock bags with full name and address, plus your screen-name written on the bag
7) Self-addressed mailing label with Priority postage
Cards to reach me in Wisconsin before June 25. Turn around time dependent on the number of participants but hopefully right away. I will provide the return boxes/envies.
9) When you sign up for the swap I will e-mail you my mailing address! Have fun! These should be classics!
I'm a remedial swap girl.... can someone please tell me what NVR means? Is it Not Very Raunchy Don't wanna break the rules before I even get started!
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Old 05-28-2007, 06:31 PM   #117
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Quote:
Originally Posted by StampBee View Post
depending on how many sign up...I would put them in small groups of 8 or 10....I like doing "full" cards, but just "fronts" is ok with me too, I would also do a No Vender Restriction(NVR), oh, have them make at least one or two layers and some kind of embellishment....AM I BEEING TOO BOSSY?!?!
answered my own question.... why do I always read from bottom to top?
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Old 05-28-2007, 06:33 PM   #118
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Cute! No....NVR means No Vendor Reguirements. In other words you can use any stamps and paper that you want to use. hehe

Sara
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Old 05-28-2007, 06:56 PM   #119
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Nooooo. I must go to bed. NVR is No Vendor Restrictions. Aaargh. 'Nite.
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Old 05-28-2007, 07:05 PM   #120
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sara in WI View Post
Nooooo. I must go to bed. NVR is No Vendor Restrictions. Aaargh. 'Nite.
requirements or restrictions... we still think you're a good hostess Sara G'night!
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Michele :)
<--------- No more braces! After 4 years, 4 months and 8 days - my teeth are free.
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