The only holiday I get with my kids and grandkids is Christmas breakfast. We used to do others, but they complained about having to go to two houses in one day. My daughter-in-law's mom is Madam Queen Bee, and MUST have them on holidays. So I would rather give in than cause problems. I do insist on breakfast which is around 10:30 or so, and then they go to dinner at HER house. One year SHE decided to have brunch instead of dinner, and my wonderful son spoke up and said "All my mom has ever had with us is breakfast on Christmas day, and you are not taking that away from her. You may have your brunch and your daughter can come if she wants to, but I and MY SONS will go to MY MOM'S." That solved that and there hasn't been another word about changing. We used to do New Years Day, big meal with collards and blackeyed peas and chicken and dressing etc. But now that all but one are grown up, they are probably too hung over for that. The last time we did it everybody was quiet and grumpy and I just decided not to deal with that either.
Never understimate the power of a HISSY FIT!