Tuesday, January 5, 2010 2:16 PM, CST
Okay, let me see how many of you I can confuse, as I was there just a minute ago but I think we finally have this little dilemma figured out now. I still haven't heard from Dr. Hum yet concerning the results but Patrick did speak with our brother-in-law, John, who understands the family side of this waiting game but also has the means as a pediatrician to have the CT results faxed to his office in OKC.
We, at this point, are not declaring victory over the cancer in Sicily's abdomen yet because our hospital here does not have a copy of the most recent scan, the baseline post surgery, of her kidney/liver area due to the fact that the baseline was done in OKC on November 10th. The radiologist could only compare yesterdays abdominal scan to the one from October 9th when the recurrence was discovered. Since surgery was performed in between the two scans done here, we can't rely on the results and will need a copy of the other scan from OKC before we can determine how well the treatment has worked. We do know that there is still cancer remaining behind Sicily's liver near the vena cava and that is what we are waiting to find out how much, if any, it has shrunk. Does any of that make sense?
We did, however, have the baseline for her chest done here and the comparison from the November 18th scan says the lungs are CLEAR. “That”, we will accept as a victory!!! I'm still inhaling and exhaling slowly until I am told the percentage of change in the tumor still in her tummy. It is safe to say it has not grown any, which is definitely a good sign!
I have no idea what the next step in treatment will be as it needs to be determined based on the results we are having to wait a little longer for. I did not expect to hear that the cancer would be completely gone, and on the same note I did not expect to hear that the cancer had grown. I really tried not to “expect” anything too good or too bad. I'm maintaining my stance of remaining in the middle of the road... whether we find ourselves driving through the mountains or the valleys of our life! I feel safe in this mode...my safe mode! It works to help maintain the balance I so often strive for but many times can't quite acquire!
So, in a nut shell, we know a little but still crave a final “say” and will continue to wait as patiently as we can...prayers are being answered as I am still able to function and am not feeling my heart palpitate too much! ; ) It helps that Sicily is so healthy acting and feeling, other than the junk still trying to hold onto a spot in her body. She smiles and giggles and plays. I'm very seriously considering taking her to school the next two days to let her live it up a bit before we continue with the next phase of treatment. Even though my head wants to keep her in the confines of our house to protect her, my heart knows to let her enjoy life and grab at the chances to fill it with experiences that will help her get through the tough times yet to come! I haven't talked myself into it yet, but I am leaning towards it.
I don't know if I can handle being home without her here with me for four and a half hours. She is my constant companion, and even though we can wear on each others nerves, the house is just too quiet when she's not here chasing the cat around with a stethoscope or singing out of tune at the top of her lungs any song that comes to mind. She's a hoot, but I'm willing to make the sacrifice of facing loneliness if she is able to enjoy a couple of days of “normal life” by getting to go to school!
I'd better sign off as the princess is snoozing on the couch and I can go up and down the stairs briefly without having to tell her my every move! ; ) I'll report if or when we get anymore news. Thanks for the abundance of prayers. Living proof...that's what we are...living proof! By the way, Isabella chose the new background for this site yesterday. I think she made a good choice!