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Old 03-10-2009, 12:44 PM   #195
caterinafmig
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Join Date: Jan 2008
Location: Reisterstown, Maryland
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MONDAY, MARCH 09, 2009 03:46 PM, CDT

Afternoon,

It definitely feels like it's a Monday...and the Monday following day light savings, at that. Can't get myself motivated or energetic about anything. Corinthian called from school a little after 9:30 and asked me to come and get him as he was running a fever. He said he didn't feel horrible, but definitely felt something coming on. He hates to miss school, but he had no choice. Dang it...we were doing so good.

I've taken his temp a couple of times since he's been home and once it was 99.3 and just a bit ago it was 98.6...perfect. And that was without any medication. He has been resting in his room so that may account for the decline. I just hope he's not coming down with something. It's hard to keep Sicily from hanging around her big brother. She loves being around him.

She is doing good. She fell asleep in a chair in the living room earlier this afternoon. As long as it's her idea!

I've been feeling the blues a lot more lately. Can't explain the reason, just happens. Goes with the territory, I guess. One day I'm feeling good and positive, the next I'm down and depressed. The fluctuations change quicker than the Oklahoma wind!

Another hospital stay is right around the corner, so I think my heart gets heavy when I think about that. As great as all the people at the hospital who work with us may be, I'm tired of going! This will be hospital stay number four (treatments only) and if Sicily can do as well as she has done thus far, we'll be half way done and will have four more stays to go. We're hoping for an end of treatment in June sometime.

I can't say that we'll celebrate too much. It really doesn't mean much, not like she's cured. There's a lot of publications that say after five years one can be considered cured. But that isn't always so. There's a girl who's mom is involved in the online support group I'm in for Wilm's kids who happened to relapse after 13 years. Who would've ever imagined? Another parent commented that we may never be able to "exhale!" We will never let our guard down ever again with these children who have had to engage in the cancer battle. I guess it's thoughts like those that really eat away at my strength.

I want a cure; I want more attention and funding given to pediatric cancer research; I want the words, "Your child has cancer" to not be the words related to dispair, anguish and grief; I want this to end! The days when I learn of another child prematurely earning their angel wings are almost too much to bare!

Sorry for unloading! Sometimes it just needs to be done...and I usually feel better afterwards. So thanks for the ears! ; ) And the prayers, as I know they help us get through the low times!

Kerry
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